FireAnIce Vs. ELMO | Che Vs. Akira | Ryu Vs. Hystalin the Black Paladin | Archangel Gabriel Vs. Spawn | Guyver & Devilman Vs. Team Rocket | Lina Inverse Vs. Happosai | Ukyo Vs. Najaro the Wind Wizard | Erlos & New Wave Dave Vs. Nellos & Vivalis

Fire N’ Ice v. ELMO

Ralph – It’s time for one of our tag team fights tonight — Fire N’ Ice versus ELMO.
BoB – It’s sort of strange that an untried team like ELMO should debut against the veteran and undefeated Fire N’ Ice, isn’t it?

Ralph – Indeed it is, BoB, but practically everything about ELMO is strange, if you ask me.

BoB – I can’t dispute that. It will be interesting to see how they fight.

Ralph – That’s right. For anyone who hasn’t been keeping up with the recent UCTF rookies: El and Mo are both big globs of gunk.

BoB – Yeah. They’re jello, or gelatin, or jelly, or something. It’s hard to say. Especially since no one seems to have seen them aside from their weird home videos.

Ralph – Here come Fireball and Ice man now! And the crowd loves it!

BoB – They are getting some serious fan support!

Ralph – Fireball takes his place in the ring. And that must be ELMO entering now.

BoB – El and Mo have formed legs in their masses and are walking to the ring in single file. It’s kind of funny looking — big balls of glop on top of pairs of legs.

Ralph – Listen to that, BoB! ELMO is getting some fan support too!

BoB – It’s true. The reaction doesn’t seem to be what Fire N’ Ice got, but you have to listen closely to tell!

Ralph – The grey blob, Mo, climbs into the ring. His legs immediately give way, and now is just sort of sitting there as a formless shape.

BoB – Can it fight? Because we know Fireball can… we’re gonna start any time now.


Ralph – Here we go! Mo drops and begins to spread across the floor, nearing Fireball. Fireball steps… uh… into the midst of it. He stomps upon the jello, but it just shifts around his foot!

BoB – And Mo grows again about Fireball. He squirms and climbs up Fireball’s legs! Fireball is trying to shake it off, but it isn’t working well! I don’t think he knows how to deal with it! But is Mo really doing any damage?

Ralph – Mo is climbing higher and higher up Fireball. Most of him must be off the floor now, and he starts to wrap around Fireball’s neck! This doesn’t look good at all!

BoB – A trio of ice spheres, one after another, slam into the blob, coming from the sidelines. Ice man is doing all he can to help! He’s lucky he didn’t hit his partner, though. It seemed to hurt Mo, who slides down onto the canvas again.

Ralph – Mo slithers to his corner, where he is replaced by ELMO’s other member, El, the green gel.

BoB – The green blob replaces the grey one. It shoots a long string of gel across the ring and wraps it about the turnbuckle. El launches himself towards the turnbuckle, slamming into Fireball along the way! And Fireball is trapped in a sticky mass of glop! Yuck!

Ralph – It’s a sticky situation, all right. Fireball is having some serious trouble getting his limbs to move right. He utilizes a fire attack! And that scorched off much of El! The proximity of the blast, however, wasn’t good for Fireball. Fireball falls to his knees, but sends another scorching blast after El, which incinerates a good portion of his body… or whatever.

BoB – El is quiet and on the floor, which must be the equivalent of unconscious for him. Mo pulls him from the ring and enters again… but on the other side, Fireball is in no shape to fight, either. Ice man replaces him for FAI.

Ralph – Ice man attacks again with his ice projectiles, but Mo is prepared and slides aside. The two draw together to battle in the center of the ring.

BoB – Ice man smacks Mo with a roundhouse kick… but Mo seems to grab his foot. Mo twists and twirls Ice man by the foot, right with him! Ice man pries himself free and moves to his corner.

Ice man – How the hell do we beat these things? Kicks and punches aren’t doing a damn bit of good!

Fireball – Unh… the elemental attacks have some effect…

Ice man – You know what this means, don’t you? Wake up and gimme all the effort you’ve got, Fireball!

Ralph – Fireball outside the ring pulls himself up slowly by the ropes. Back inside, Mo slams against Ice man, knocking him into the turnbuckle! Ice man leaps into the air, and…

Fireball – Prepare for the Fire N’ Ice Final Attack!


BoB – Ice man releases a huge spiked ball of ice at Mo! Fireball adds his respective element, increasing the speed of the ice and setting it on fire! The ball smashes into — and right through Mo!

Ralph – Egad! There’s a big hole in him!

BoB – Mo slumps to the ground, as does Fireball… but Ice man is still standing in the ring! Mo is staying down…

Ralph – Still down…

BoB – And the count is finished! Fire N’ Ice remain undefeated by winning tonight against ELMO!

Ralph – But you gotta admit, BoB, ELMO put out a surprising fight on their part against the most capable tag team in the UCTF!

BoB – That was certainly something, Ralph. Let’s see if things get even better as the night progresses….

Winners: Fire N’ Ice

Che v. Akira

BoB – One of the many treats we have in store for us tonight is the debut match of Che, who will be facing off against Akira. How do you see this one going, Ralph?
Ralph – That’s difficult to say, BoB. We don’t really know what this Che can do.

BoB – It looks like we’ll find out soon enough. Che is already in the ring with not one, but two elaborate swords. Akira is approaching, meanwhile, and he isn’t on his motorcycle.

Ralph – Thank the bananaman for that!

BoB – The who?

Ralph – The bananaman, man!

BoB – Yeah. Sure.

Ralph – Akira steps into the ring. We’re ready to begin!


BoB – Che wastes no time rushing toward Akira and lashing out with a high kick! Akira dodges and draws back in a defensive mode!


Ralph – Che releases a sphere of energy at Akira, sending Akira sprawling! Che draws closer, but Akira is on his feet quickly. Akira ducks a sword slash from Che and leaps foreward, tackling him! Che hits the ground hard and one of his blades is sent scattering along the ring floor!

BoB – Che takes a tough punch from Akira, and… #$%@! Look at that, Ralph! Something is happening to Che!

Ralph – Che throws Akira and rises from the floor! His eyes begin to glow and his shirt is torn from his body. Che looks mad!

BoB – I think it’s something more than mad, Ralph. A series of white wings sprout from his back and… uh oh, Akira doesn’t look so good!

Ralph – I don’t think he knew what he was getting into, BoB.

BoB – Che floats just above the ring towards his opponent. Akira dodges a swipe but falls right into Che’s foot! Che drops to the floor and retrieves his second blade. Akira catches Che in the side with a blow, but he’s not in a strong enough condition for it to do much damage! Che throws Akira across the ring, where he rebounds off the far ropes.

Ralph – Upon Returning, he takes a serious smack from the pommel of Che’s Murasamane! Akira hits the floor, but Che isn’t done! Che slams a clenched fist against the ground! Sparks of energy flow from the floor and smack into Akira, who looks to be out cold!

BoB – What does Che think he’s doing? He continues to kick Akira while he’s down! And the ref is trying to wave him off…

Ralph – Che seems to finally be regaining his senses… he draws back. And the referee begins the count.


BoB – Che is holding his head… that’s strange, Ralph. Akira didn’t hit him in the head.

Ralph – Well BoB, I don’t know if Che is a normal human.


BoB – And that’ll do it, folks! Che takes out Akira in his debut, and deals a little extra!

Ralph – It will be interesting to see where this guy goes in the UCTF, BoB. In any case, they’re dragging Akira from the ring, and it looks like it’s time to move on to our next fight.

Winner: Che

hystalin v. ryu

BoB: Okay, our next fight up for tonight is Hystalin the Black Paladin going up against fello street fighter, Ryu.

Ralph: This fight was supposed to be up Thanksgiving Day, but due to a technical glitch, it was was postponed until tonight.

BoB: Here comes Ryu now! Man, is he hyped tonight.

Ralph: I’ll say, he’s ready to kick some major ass tonight.

BoB: Do you see Hystalin around here?

Ralph: Look, she’s right over there. She’s coming to the the ring. I heard that in a freak accident, she was transformed into a giant were-monkey and caused massive damage.

BoB: And now, the two come to the center of the ring and shake hands. (DING!)

Ryu: I’ve been waiting a long time for this.

Hystalin: As have I been. I’ll have revenge for what you did to me in the rumbles!

Ralph: Ryu throws a fireball at Hystalin, but she easily blocks it.

Hystalin: That was too weak… FIRE3!!!

BoB: Hystalin throws a Fire3 spell at Ryu, but Ryu easily dodges it easily.

Ryu: You’ve seen to have grown stronger since your interference in my fight with your tag team partner Naga.

Hystalin: I think it has to do with the tail.

Ryu: Oh yeah, I’m sorry that happened.

Hystalin: Thank you, now we continue the fight!

Ralph: Hystalin jumps in the air and throws an Aero2 spell on Ryu. Ryu is standing firm.

BoB: I’m surprised by this. It’s getting really windy in here.

Ralph: I’ll say. (The winds pick up some of the spectators in the ring… one of which is Ukyo.)


Ukyo: How many times do I have to tell you? Stop calling me that, or I’ll shove a spatula up your ass!

BoB: HAHAHAHA!!!!! (The winds pick up Ukyo and blows her all over the ring.)

Ralph: Bye U-Chan!

BoB: Oh God!

Ralph: Look down there! Hystalin is still going strong on Ryu.

BoB: I’ll say.

Ralph: What is she doing?

BoB: Hystalin is not moving. What is that shining on her?

Ralph: Look up there! Someone is shining that weird light on her.

Victoro: HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Now the UCTF will fear the wrath of Victoro! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Ralph: Isn’t that the mock moonlight spell he did a few days ago.

BoB: I think so, and look! Hystalin is slowly transfroming in a giant were-monkey!

Ralph: This does not bode well!

Hystalin: Not again!

Victoro: Don’t ever fuck with me Black Paladin!

Hystalin: Victoro!

Victoro: I told you that you will never have a moment’s rest of normalcy without my say so, and I’m proving it now! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

BoB: Hystalin turned around, knocking Ryu off the ring.. and he’s out cold! Now it’s a fight between Hystalin and Victoro!

Hystalin: You will pay for that lunacy bit you did on me!

Victoro: Will you take my Visa or my Mastercard?

Ralph: Hystalin is running towards Victoro, and bellowed out an energy blast from her mouth! It only grazed Victoro!

BoB: Now Victoro is chanting some sort and dark magic spell on Hystalin, and survives unscathed by the assult!

Ralph: What is he doing now?

BoB: He’s running away, and turned off his mock moonlight attack. Hystalin is slowly turning back to normal…. but she’s naked!

Ralph: This is not for young eyes to see.

BoB: Wait, what’s going on now?

Ralph: JESUS CHRIST! It’s Happosai, and he’s trying to cop a feel.

BoB: That is disgusting!

Beowulf Get away from her you old fart! Happosai: Back off wolf-boy! I’m trying to have some fun!

BoB: Beowulf grabbed Happosai and threw him across the ring. Surprisingly, he lands safely on his bag of women’s undergarments.

Ralph: Hystalin is still in the ring, although she’s naked. It looks like Hystalin is the winner.

BoB: Someone dress up that girl!

Winner: Hystalin

Gabriel v. Spawn

BoB- here comes on of our next competiors, newciommer gabriel.. the archangel. .he’ll be fighting spawn who is already in the ring

ralph- her ecomes th ebell


BoB=The two size each other up as spawn launches two chains at gabriel.. he manges to block one with the sword but the other ctaches around his leg.. he merely bends over and gives it ahearty yank sending spawn to his back.. he then leaps or uhh flies into the air and attemts to divebomb spawn with his sword

ralph- but spawn moves out of the way just in time.. gabriel looks a little hur or sutnned as spawn attmepts a backbreaker.. but gabriel grabs spanwn’s neck on the way down and flips him over…

BoB- gabriel take shis sowrd.. he’s ready to finish him off now.. but ait here comes beowulf…

ralph- he’s pulled gabriel away from spawn.. but sapwn is out cold already…

Winner- Gabriel

Guyver/devilman v. team rocket
BoB- here coem the unlikly combo of guyver and Devilman.. it seems devilman has a pokeball with his as does guyver.. and here comes team rocket!!

Jessie: get ready for trouble

James: better make that double

Jessie: To protect the world from devistation..

James: To unite all peoples within our nation..

Jessie: To denounce the evils of truth and love!

James: To extend our reach to the stars above!

Jessie: Jessie!

James: James!

Jessie: Team Rocket! Blast off at the speed of light!

James: Surrender now or prepare to fight!

Meowth: Meowth! That’s right!

BoB- here comes good ole mr bell

Guyver- WIAT! I have a proposition.. to make this fair I challenge you to a two on two pokemon fight.. jessiea nd jame seach get one and devilamn and I each get one.. we fight untill one side is gone

James: yes let’s do it

Jessie: you probably would have murdered us the other way

James: I choose.. Ratata

Jessie I choose… Vulpix!!

Devilman- I will be using Charmander

Guyver- PIKACHU! I choose you!!

Jessie- he’s using pikachu?

James how rare and exquisite we must have it… here’s something if we win we get your two pokemon.. if you win.. you get ours deal?

Guyver- deal


James: Ratata.. TACKLE ATTACK!!

Guver Pikachu!Thunderwave!

BoB: and pikachu’s thunderwave attack knocke dback james’s Ratata…

Devilman: charmander.. Flamethorwer

Jessie- VULPIX.. flamethorwe

BoB- the trwo seemed to cancel eahc othe rout..


ralph- oh my it’s.. the lovely miss sarah chan.. hello sarah.

Sarah hi ralph. What are they doing with my pokemon?

BoB- your pokemon? Sarah- yeah.. I was training my vulpix this morning when these two rhymers stole him.. they also got my ratata.. and I almost had him evolved nito a raticade too (snif sniff)

Guyver- you mean you two have been bettnig with sarah-chan’s pokemon?

james- you don’t think we’d put our oWN on the lien would you. Sarahchan- VULPIX,FIRESPIN!!! Ratata SUPERFanG!!!

BoB- ohh it looks like vulpix and Ratata have turned on jessie and james.. they’re fleeing the arena…

Meowth- hey wait for meeeeeeeowth!!! Guyver- I guess that’s a win.

Pickachu -pika pikaCHU!!!

Devilamn- hehe yeah I guess so

guyver- you can keep that charmander by the way.. I have naother

Devilman- oh uhh thanks

Charmnader- cahr..charmander (looksloovingly at devilman)

ralph- ahh isn’t that cute?


BoB- security!!! )Security comes and takes azusa off

Azusa oh what a cute badge.. gimme my little enrique

Winner: Devilman and Guyver

Lina v. happosai

BoB- here comes lina inverse.. ready to beat the living tar out of happosai.. need I show why?

ralph- please do.. (the big screen tv on the jumbotron shows what happened when happosai removed all o flina’s cliothing with a voodoo doll

Lina- you can turn that off now!!

BoB- sorry.. heyhere comes happosai.. he’s entering, as usual down throgh the crowd, flipping up skirts and the such…

happosai- what a haul I just raided the girls lockerroom here.. let me tell you that hystalin’s got a nice set of

Lina shut your trap.. and face me… LINA INVERSE

Happosai- of course.. but I won’t like it.. yiu se.. your chest isn’t that big

Lina- cut it out will ya?


Lina- not her..

Naga- HAHAHAHAHAHAH see I told you.. look at me.. I have a chest to di for

happosai- hubbahubba yes (he grabs a breast and is flung around helplessly into a rope..

Lina- naga.. I want to do this one on my own..

naga- you can’t lina.. you’re too flat chested.. I suppose I’ll defeat this one fo ryou.. flare arrow!!

Happosai- heyu what’d you do that for!?

naga- freeze arrow<> happosai that smarts


Happosai uhoh

BoB- it looks like happosai is out for a while.. fried by naga

Lina- you bitch.. this wa smy fight,P> naga- yeah.. well not tonight HAHAHAHAHAHA

lina- ok.. here it is you and me and happosai, next week.. three corners last one standing.. got it?

naga- hahahahahahaha of course I’ve been wanting to geta shot at you for a long time HAHJAHAHAHAHAH Lina- ok… it’s on then

BoB- winner- Lina via naga

Ukyo v. najaro
BoB: Now that everything has somehow returned back to normal, we can to the next fight, Najaro the Wind Wizard Vs. Ukyo the Spatula Girl.

Ralph: Ukyo? U-CHAN IS HERE?

BoB: Calm down Ralph.

Ralph: GO U-CHAN!

BoB: Ahh.. that cage and the water tank is now set up. Ukyo & Najaro both enter the cage.

Ukyo I see you’ve kept your promise Najaro.

Najaro: Por supuesto! Guardo siempre mis promesas.

Ukyo What did you say?

Najaro: Yo habla espanol.

Ukyo Whatever, now let’s see how you Storm Wand fare against the almighty spatula!

BoB: Ukyo rushes in and attacks Najaro. Najaro blocks easily with his wand.

Ralph: GO U-CHAN!

BoB: Najaro looks like he’s trying to cast a spell.

Najaro: Damn! My magic will not work in the cage!

Ukyo Didn’t you know? There is a magic ward around the arena. Your wind magic will not work in here.

Najaro: Puta!

Ukyo What did you call me?

Ralph: What was that? Puta? What does that mean?

BoB: It means “bitch”.

Ralph: How dare he call my U-Chan a bitch! KILL HIM U-CHAN!

BoB: Najaro leaps from one of the cage walls and catapults himself on Ukyo! Ukyo throws some tiny spatulas at Najaro, but Najaro blocks them easily with his Storm Wand.

Ralph: Hey? What is Najaro going to pull off his voodoo doll trick?

BoB: Najaro made a promise with Ukyo before the fights that he will not pull the voodoo doll trick he did with Lina Inverse.

Ralph: Damn! That sucks!

Najaro: Y ahora, esta lucha terminará pronto!

Ukyo Care to speak english Najaro? I don’t understand a fucking word you’re saying!

BoB: Najaro uses the top end of his Storm Wand on the floor. What the? He triggered the trap door mechanism! They both fall out of the cage!

Ralph: NO!!!!! U-CHAN!!!

BoB: It looks like the fight ends in a draw… wait a minute! Najaro’s cape is caught in one of the hooks. Lucky for him! Najaro wins the fight!

Ralph: What?!?! Najaro won?!?!?! HE BEAT U-CHAN???!?!?!?!?!

BoB: Uhh… yeah.

Ralph: Excuse me…

BoB: Najaro gets his cape out of that snatch and lands safely on the floor. It looks like he’s helping Ukyo out of the water. He’s saying something to Ukyo.

Najaro: Senora Ukyo, usted hizo bien en el duelo enjaulado. Es una compasión que usted ha perdido. No se preocupe, allí no es ninguna vergüenza en incidente. Le deseo suerte en cualquier otra lucha que usted consiga en Senora Ukyo.

BoB: I wish someone would bring a translator in here. What the?

Ralph: You’re gonna pay for getting my Ukyo wet!

BoB: Ralph? He’s attacking Najaro!

Najaro: Senor, calmate. No hay necesidad de ser hostil.

Ralph: Shut your mouth Wind Wizard! This is for Ukyo!

BoB: Ralph, get back here! You know you’re not supposed to interfere with the fights.

Ralph: I will fight for the one I love! This is for you U-Chan… HUH?

Ralph: Oh my god! Ukyo got out of the water tank and shoved one of her spatulas up Ralph’s ass! This is disgusting!

Najaro: Ukyo? Que pasa?

Ukyo English please?

Ralph: U-chan, what did you do to me?

Ukyo: I told you I would shove one of my spatulas up your ass if you stop calling me U-Chan. I kept my promises, didn’t I?

BoB: Ukyo violently pulled the spatula out of Ralph’s ass! He has doubled over! Serves him right! What’s this? Ifurita?

Ifurita: It serves you right for interfering with the fight! Now, I’ll be putting you back up to the announcers box, and you better stay there, or I’ll uhh… do something… I don’t know what, but you won’t like a bit.

BoB: Thank you for bringing Ralph back up here.

Ifurita: No problem

BoB: Ifurita returns back to her seat. Ralph?

Ralph: Oh, my ass!

BoB: It serves you right.

Ralph: Can we get to the next fight please? I think I need something for my ass.

BoB: Whatever, let’s go on to the next fight of the evening.

BoB- All right everyone, it’s time for the fight if the century, Talon and Erlos vs. Vivalis and Nellos!!

(Crowd explodes)

Ralph- It is a capacity crowd here in the huge open air arena in the UCTF stadium, and these people here are the few that will actually witness first hand, the deciding moment on weather or not humanity as we know it will go on!

BoB- That’s right Ralph… And the arena has gone totally dark! But wait!

(Lightning strikes inside the arena and the moment it touches down the lights come back on from what appears to be a new generator on top of the UCTF arena, and Nellos and Vivalis are standing in the ring)

BoB- There is lightning in the arena and the lights are once again restored!

Ralph- And there’s Nellos and Vivalis!

BoB- OH my gosh! I didn’t even see them!

(Music starts to play as NWD and Erlos enter)

Ralph- And here come NWD and Erlos!

Erlos- Now to finish this…

(Erlos enters the ring)

BoB- And Nellos and Vivalis don’t even wait for the bell! Both demons leap on Erlos! Erlos trying to throw them off is unsuccessful, but here comes NWD, with Dragon’s Fang! NWD slashes at the back of Vivalis, but Vivalis wearing spiked armor on his forearms spins around and blocks the deadly blade!

Ralph- Erlos grabs the back Vivalis and pulls him away from NWD and throws him on the ground!

BoB- That was really impressive. Vivalis standing a near ten and a half feet tall with a long thin body covered with jutting spikes is not the easiest one to man-handle.

Ralph- And not to mention Nellos. For those of you who don’t know, Nellos is only about six and a half feet weighing 525 lbs of sheer brute strength. He has long dagger-like claws on both hands that are approximately four inches each.

BoB- They are truly a intimidating sight. However it doesn’t look that much like NWD and Erlos are intimidated. Because they are both attacking full force against the demons! Erlos is trying to immobilize the much larger Nellos, while NWD is brutally attacking Vivalis with Dragon’s fang!

Ralph- And Vivalis grabs the wrist of NWD’s hand that is holding Dragon’s fang and twists it around!! And…

BoB- OH MY GOD!!!!!!

Ralph- Oh my!!! Vivalis has broken the wrist of NWD! NWD drops the sword as he is picked up by Vivalis and thrown out of the ring! And just about lands on Charleston and Lenny who are in the front row!

BoB- But I think there are bigger problems now! Nellos grabbing both arms of Erlos, who is wearing his traditional skull mask, throws him into the turn buckle! Nellos lunges in and slashes Erlos in the face, and rips right through his chrome mask like butter!!!! Erlos is now bleeding profusely from the face!

Ralph- And Vivalis turns around and is also heading for Erlos! But Vivalis engulfed in flames! And Shayla Shayla makes a leaping entrance into the ring! And the flames die out but Shayla Shayla creates another fire ball!

Vivalis- Stupid bitch…

BoB- Shayla launches another fire ball at Vivalis, but he passes through it like it were just wind, and grabs Shayla around the neck, and picks here up!

Shayla Shayla- Aaaahhh!!!!!!

Ralph- Meanwhile Nellos just beat the crap out of Erlos in the corner and Erlos is down!


(Looking down at Erlos) I told you I was the most powerful demon, but you did not listen because you are a fool. You pathetic little time jumping fag.

BoB- Did he just call Erlos a fag?

Ralph- I think he did.

BoB- And Nellos walks towards Vivalis who is still holding Shayla up by the neck!

nellos- Talon’s girl huh? Well, I suppose that we can..

NWD- Stop!!

BoB- And NWD is back up!

Ralph- May I remind the listeners that this is a fight to the death, there are no knock outs, and no count outs.

BoB- Thanks Ralph. NWD craws back up into the ring with a limp hand, and dives for Dragon’s Fang, but it is picked up by Nellos first!

Ralph- This could kill NWD because he is half demon!

BoB- That’s right, and Nellos strikes the Neck of Dave, and… Only sends him down! Huh?

Ralph- Dave’s conscious must be the dominant one, because Dragon’s Fang had no affect on him!

nellos- Just as well, ripping you apart limb from limb will be just as easy.

BoB- And Nellos picks up Dave by his good arm, and now Vivalis slams down Shayla Shayla and grabs the other arm of Dave! This could get messy.

Ralph- But Up comes Erlos, and he slams Nellos in the back with a punch which sends him to one knee! Nellos quickly gets back up, turns around, and crushes Erlos on the side of the head with a hook! Erlos was blocking there but it didn’t really do too much good considering the immense strength of Nellos!

BoB- Erlos staggers back, and is now sent to the canvas by another devastating hook from Nellos!

Vivalis- Come on! Let’s do this!

BoB- Vivalis is still holding the arm of Dave, but he is hit by and elbow shot from NWD! Vivalis was not expecting that one, and follows through with a thy kick! Nellos now charges at Dave with his shoulder! He connects and sends NWD bouncing off the ropes and back into his clutches!

Ralph- And Nellos, and Vivalis each take an arm of NWD again and begin to tear!

Erlos- Nooooo!!!!

(Erlos raises a single hand and shoots a burst of energy at Nellos, making a small but severe burn on his back)

BoB- A shot from Erlos Staggers Nellos but he quickly regains his composure, and begins to pull outward on Dave!

Shayla Shayla- N…. no.. Some one… help him…

Vivalis- Hahahahahah!!!!!!

(A tearing sound is heard, and blood is now able to be seen soaking through Dave’s shirt)

BoB- NWD is being torn apart! Erlos gets up and attacks the back of Nellos but is sent back by a backhand smack! But look!! Here comes Beowulf, Fireball, Ice man, and Hystalin!

Lina- Guyver, Ryu, Duncan.. we have got to go find the battle do you know where it is?

Ryu- it is in the open air arena.. let’s go!!

Mechafelix2- mmreeeooowwww

Guyver- uhh guys.

Lina- hey!

Guyver- you too lina.. we have got problems… sayien-C and Jin enters

Jin- the mecha cat…

Sayien-C- let’s get it… Duncan- not a good idea guys..

Ryu- it looks like were stuck here

Lina- DAMN!! what if.. what if something happens?

Guyver-Iwouldn’t worry about that, lina… Dave and Erlos know what they’re doing they will win.. they must win

Lina- yeah…


(to self) so who’s gonna convince me?

back at the open air arena
Beowulf Time to die, you demon f*cks!

Erlos- What?

Beowulf oh sorry, I mean, you other demon f*cks!

Shayla Shayla- What… about.. Talon…

Beowulf No not him, just the other… Demon f*cks!

Erlos- Hey!

Beowulf Not you! Those…. Demon f*cks!

(Points at Nellos and Vivalis, who are looking at Beowulf like he is stupid)

Erlos- Now that’s just racist.

Beowulf Damn it! fine, those Demon Americans.

Ice man- I don’t think that they are in America.

Beowulf Why don’t we just kill em, okay?

Fireball- Okay.

Ice man- Fine by me.

Hystalin- Well spoken finally,

Ralph- I don’t think that was very PC.

BoB- Shut up Ralph. And Beowulf draws his war hammer, and Lunges at Nellos! Nellos grabs the shaft of the hammer and stops it though, but Beowulf hits Nellos with an uppercut and sends him back!

Ralph- Look at this! Fireball and Ice man both fly towards Vivalis with a flying kick, which connects and sends Vivalis back to the ropes! Vivalis swinging his arms about blindly hits Fireball in the head making a substantial cut!

BoB- Ice man hurls a cantaloupe sized ice ball at Vivalis and seems to do some damage to his face. But Nellos hurling the much smaller Beowulf into the turnbuckle where Erlos is leaps at Beowulf and slashes him down the back! Hystalin now enters the ring!

Hystalin– Bahamut! I summon thee!!!!!

Bahamut- What’s up Hyst?

Hystalin– What the f*ck do you think!

(Bahamut turns around and sees the claws of Nellos slashing through his own face)

Bahamut- AAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ralph- She can’t say f*ck here but that’s beside the point. Nellos now picks up the much larger Bahamut, and throws him to the ground out of the ring like a rag doll!!!

Hystalin– You son of a……

BoB- Hystalin, leaps and attacks Nellos with a flying kick, but is bitch slapped away like a little bitch!

Ralph- Like a Black Bitch.

BoB- That’s racist Ralph. Hystalin hits the ground but Beowulf now leaps on the back of Nellos and puts him in a sleeper hold!

nellos- What a dumb shi+….

Ralph- Nellos pinches the elbow of Beowulf that is on his neck, and he shatters it!!!!! Beowulf falls off!!!!

Beowulf AAAHHH!!! okay! That wasn’t bright!

Hystalin– Wulfie!!!!

BoB- Nellos his hit by an ice ball but does not seem to be affected by it very much! And he grabs the skull of Beowulf and I think he intends to crush it!!!

Ralph- Vivalis has just beaten the shit out of Fireball, and he shoots a spike out of his arm at Hystalin who is charging Nellos! Hystalin is stabbed through the arm and is taken back and pinned to the turnbuckle!

Vivalis- Hahahah!!! Kill him!!!!

BoB- Nellos is starting to stab his claws into the brain of Beowulf.. But.. What the….

Charleston- Brnz on the canv’s? Hell no!

BoB- Charleston enters the ring and hits Nellos on the back of the head with a bucket of Lenny’s shi+!

Ralph- That’s not shi+, it’s a bucket of rotten yams that he feeds to Lenny.

BoB- No, I think that that’s shi+

Ralph- No, it’s old yams! And we are not even supposed to say shi+ here Bob.

BoB- Fine! I won’t say the S word then. Charleston hits Nellos on the head with a bucket of Lenny’s dung!

Ralph- It’s rotten yams Bob, not dung!

Charleston- Dat, buk’t a rocks will teach yeh!

BoB- Whoops! I guess it was rocks.

Ralph- Yeah, we kinda jumped the gun a bit there I guess.

BoB- Yeah. Well, Charleston hitting Nellos on the back of the head with the bucket of rocks bought Beowulf just enough time to escape! Nellos smacks Charleston out of the ring, and now heads for NWD who is laying unconscious on the other end of the ring.

Charleston- Lenny! s’k em!

(The goat with glasses stares at him)

Charleston- I sed s’k em Lenny!

(The goat with glasses stares at him)

Charlestin- Damn it Lenny!

nellos- Now you die!

Ralph- And Nellos Approaches NWD and raises his claws above his head! This could be some serious trouble!

nellos- There is no escaping me now!

(Nellos thrusts his claws into the neck of NWD)

BoB- I can’t believe he just did that! There are NO signs of movement from NWD now! He does not even appear to be breathing! Oh my God!

Ralph- This is like a ping pong game!

nellos- There! there is your champion! One down, and one more to go!

Vivalis- HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Now our goal can finally be completed! Life as you know it shall soon end!

Erlos- Not quite @$$ hole!

(Erlos holds out his hand and the blue orb appears in it)

nellos- Ha! you are far too weak to have enough power to kill us even with your little demon slaying weapon!

Erlos- You’re right, I am… But they’re not.

(Erlos tosses the orb over to where Fireball and Ice man are. The orb hovers about six feet above the ring)

Ice man- That’s right. It’s the attack of the…

Fireball- BURNING!!!!!!

Ice man- WINTER!!!!!!!!!!

(Ice man and fireball leap in the air, and Ice man creates a large spiked ball of ice in his hands and as he hurls it through the orb, towards Nellos, and Vivalis, it is set ablaze by a stream of fire from Fireball’s hands.)

BoB- And Fire N’ Ice have just used their most powerful attack, the Burning Winter through the orb which magnifies power and hits Nellos!!!

Ralph- Vivalis dove out of the way but Nellos is dead!!! The fierce power of the burning winter magnified by the orb was more than nellos’s body could withstand! Along with most of the ring!

BoB- That’s right! Nellos has been killed, and everyone who is unconscious is now even more unconcious I think, however Hystalin’s arm is unstuck now!

(Hystalin hurries off to find Beowulf)


(To himself) Take that f*cker.


(out of breath) You’re next Vivalis.

nellos- I don’t think so…

Erlos- What the hell???

nellos- Do you think I would be so stupid as to face the entire world on my own? HA! I copied myself as soon as I heard that we were going to fight, I let you fight him, if you won, I would kill you, if you lost, just as well.

(And odd red cloud has started to develop above the corps of NWD)

nellos- What is that?

(The cloud takes form of a large demon that resembles the devil. Hunched over the demon stands over 12 feet. He his long thin claws, and a thin body which is lined with black spines. He has two long black horns about 4 feet each, and long bone white teeth. His wings ate tattered, black on the outside with red lining, and a red interior. The demon’s wingspan is approximately 20 to 25 feet.)

Demon- Miss the real me Nellos???

nellos- Talon… It’s been a long time.

Talon- Too long. Now I will kill YOU just like I did G’dar.

nellos- He, I’m sure you think so. Bu I have something that you don’t have.

(Erlos, still on the ground, outstretches his hand and appears to be transmitting some energy. Suddenly the Blue orb shatters)

Talon- What was that?

nellos- This….

(From nowhere, Vivalis leaps on the back of Talon, and strikes him with a blue staff, the staff passes through Talon’s body like butter)

Talon- AAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Erlos- NO! He has the staff of Xiahau! How the hell did he get that?

Vivalis- A mind is a terrible thing to waste…

BoB- And somehow Vivalis has gotten Xiahau’s staff!! but wait! Here cones Touchstone!

Ralph- This does not bode well for Talon.

BoB- And Touchstone enters the ring!

Touchstone- well this certainly does explain a lot of things. that night when i had the fleeing you were there and I saw Dave.. it was you in Dave.. Talon. i have waited a long time for this.. DIE!!! ,P>

BoB- and touchstone just attacked Talon with his sword and manages to cut his leg.

Talon- what have you got there? that hurt.. I don’t know what your quarrel is with me touchstone but it’s not the time nor place. I’m busy trying to save humanity here

Touchsotne- revenge knows no time nor place.. you… BASTARD

Talon -I still don’t know what I did

Touchstone- I’m from the village of Porton, famous for this sword. You came one day and killed everyone.. including my family.. my darling clarissa… I managed to escape with this sword and the only other survivor, Jacques… in search of you.. for vengeance..

Vivalis- that was your town…

Talon- what the hell are you talking about fiend.

Vivalis-Ihad you destroy that town for the sword he has.. it is.. important to me..

Talon- you controlled me!?!

Touchstone- so it was YOU!!!!

Vivalis-Isuppose so…

Touchstone- then you will die by my hands this night… ,P>

Ralph- touchstone just slashed at Vivalis who catches him and throws him at talon.. touchstone is unconscious…

Talon- you used me to destroy a village.. a peaceful village…you will die tonight Vivalis.. if I go with you that will be fine as long as you go too.

Vivalis- aww isndatcute? da widdodeamon is threating me…

BoB- what the!? Talon is down!!! but Vivalis didn’t do anything.

Vivalis- ha ha fool.. you let anger guide you and it will be your downfall..

Ralph- he just picked up touchstone’s sword. it is glowing red now

Vivalis- it’s time I end your life now…

BoB- he charges at the immobile talon but… oh my NO! that ain’t right.. Touchstone dove in front of the blade and took it into his body…

Touchstone- clarissa.. i.. have failed you… forgive me for not avenging you.. this is a far better thing for me to do.. I’m.. I’ll se you.. you’re beautiful I…

BoB- this is not good.. touchstone is dead.. but the sword disappears into his body..

Talon- that was the last straw… cough

Ralph- talon is trying to move but it looks like his attempts are futile.

nellos- hehe.. that fool…

Vivalis- it’s your turn now

BoB- And Vivalis now with the blue staff again leaps at the injured Talon. But is knocked away by a fire ball from Shayla Shayla!!!! She has regained he senses!

Shayla Shayla- Talon! Save Dave!

Talon- That rhymes.

Shayla Shayla- Damn it Talon! Just do it! If you go back into him both of your lives will be saved! Now just go!!!

Talon- If it for the best…

(Talon reverts back into a gas form and returns to the body of NWD, which heals him, and he rises)

NWD- your right… it is my turn…

nellos- Erlos couldn’t kill me, and I’ll be damned if some little prick like you can. Talon! You are an embarrassment to demons everywhere!

NWD- Cut the shi+.

Erlos- Here!

Ralph- And Erlos rolls over and grabs Dragon’s Fang, and throws it to NWD! Who lunges at Nellos!

(Vivalis dives in front of Nellos and slashes at NWD with the Staff)

BoB- And NWD blocks the impact of the staff but is still sent back unharmed. Wait a minute! Here comes Devilman!

Devilman- Nice try, but it is my job to see that all demons in this world are eradicated, and it’s your turn now!!!!!!

nellos- Another feather-weight.

Ralph- Devilman flies towards Nellos, and Vivalis, but is struck by the blue staff, and…

BoB & Ralph- Holy shi+!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BoB- Oh my God!!! The staff that struck Devilman is made for killing demons, but something has gone terribly wrong I think!!! The impact of the staff has somehow separated Amon from his host!

Amon- For years, I was frozen in ice. When I finally awaken, I am trapped in the body of some little bastard. Who???

Erlos- Well, there goes the neighborhood…

nellos- Well, if it isn’t Amon, I was wondering where you have been hiding all this time?

Vivalis- Well, have I some news for you Amon, An kind of weapon has been created which can slaughter demons like cattle…


(Still on the ground, to himself) Wait a minute, if Talon could be absorbed into Dave like that, then….

Ralph- Well, Amon is here and the world is about to end. What do you plan to do?

BoB- The world is about to end? I plan to probably f*ck anything that moves. What do you plan to do?

Ralph- Keep real still.

(Erlos slowly rises for the first time since he was knocked down, he holds out his hands in a circular shape, and begins to focus. The three demons have just circled around NWD)

nellos- You could have helped up

Amon- Yes, you could helped rule the world, and now you will die.

Erlos- Not quite!

(A charge of energy comes from the weakened hands of Erlos and he absorbs Amon, and all of Amon’s power)


(Glowing) I feel much better!!!!!!!

Ralph- And Erlos charges at Vivalis! Vivalis swings the staff at Erlos but Erlos catches it and kicks Vivalis down!

NWD- (to himself) I’ve been waiting for this….

BoB- As Nellos is looking at Erlos and Vivalis, NWD is..

Ralph- He isn’t!!!

BoB- He is!!!!!

NWD- 80’s EXPLOSION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(NWD does the 80’s explosion and takes Nellos down)

BoB- and Nellos is down!!!!!!!!!!!!! For the first time tonight Nellos has fallen to the ground!

Ice man- We still can do it…. Final attack!

Fireball- Burning!!!!

BoB- Fire N’ Ice prepare to execute the Burning Winter technique, but Fireball is knocked to the ground by Xiahau!!!!

Ralph- What is this? Since when has Xiahau been on the side of Nellos and Vivalis?

BoB- Since the beginning you fool!

Fireball- What the… Xiahau?

BoB- Xiahau attacks Fireball but is knocked back by NWD!

NWD- What the hell is wrong with you?

Erlos- We have bigger problems than him right now!

NWD- Yeah!

BoB- Fireball and Ice man take down Xiahau, Dave grabs Dragon’s fang, and Erlos grabs the blue staff, and both fighters leap at Nellos!

Ralph- Look! Nellos has been struck by both weapons! And I think He’s dead! The devastation of Nellos looks like it may be no more! Again.

Vivalis- You will never win!!

Erlos- I think you’re wrong there pal.

Fireball- BURNING!!!!

Ice man- WINTER!!!!!

BoB- Fire N’ Ice cast the burning winter again, and wait! Erlos shoots a stream of light from his hands as NWD executes his whisper blast technique!!! All four fighters have shot Vivalis with something!!

Ralph- And Vivalis is ripped in half by the blast, but still appears to be alive!!!

Vivalis- We… may.. not kill you…. n…now.. But.. we… will never… y…y… you succeed, Now…. Xiahau!

(Xiahau reaches in his robe and pulls out the book of death)

Erlos- NOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! That will kill us all!!!!!!!

Xiahau– Hayo graciyaa, zugzug, snorbu, lokedar, bad morus tiyrak….

Erlos- The end…

(The whole world goes silent when Xiahau reads the words from the book, every body sitting in their seats trembling with fear, hoping that this is not their last day on earth. As the earth starts to rumble)

NWD- What’s going to happen Erlos?!?!?!

Erlos- The demon from beyond has been summoned.

NWD- How do you stop it?

Erlos- There is no way. Once he has been summoned, there is no way to stop him from running his course. Not you, I, and all of the demons in the world could ever hope to compare to this.

NWD- So this is it? we are all dead?

Erlos- I am afraid so. He will be coming soon….

(The demon’s evil presence is felt by all, but no one sees anything. Everyone is looking around, when out of the crowd, a goat’s head with glasses pops up. And begins to quickly grow)

BoB- What the???

(Lenny starts to hover in the air and grows until he almost totally fills up the entire open air arena)

Charleston- Lenny! Gt down ere!

Erlos- I made the Demon Lenny. World- WHAT???

Erlos- Sorry.

(The huge 100,000 ton goat with glasses begins flying over the land and sucking up everything. Earth, sea, and sky.)

NWD- What is that up there?

(All attention focuses to the new generator)

Mourl- ………… …………… …………………………………. ……………………… …………….. ………………….!…………………… ……………… …………?

Tetsuko- Let’s go!

Mourl- ……………. ……………!

(Mourl pushes a button releasing the huge tranquilizer that the Beakless Mourls have been making. The missile strikes Lenny right in the side.)

BoB- And Lenny has been hit by a huge missile made by Mourl!

Ralph- Look! Lenny has reverted back to his goat form!

(Lenny falls back into the arena and is caught by Charleston)

Charleston- Lenny! I tld ye not to do stuff like dat!

(The goat with glasses stares at him)

NWD- Is it gone?

Erlos- Yes! The demon Lenny was only made to become that form one time! The chemicals on Mourl’s rocket must have neutralized him! We won…

(Everyone in the whole dimension explodes in mass cheers)

(Erlos returns the power of Amon to Devilman, and then passes out. And when Vivalis finally dies Xiahau is returned to normal. Dave holds Shayla in his arms as they stare into the horizon.)

NWD- farewell touchstone…

(Fireball and Iceman give each other a high five)

Shayla Shayla- he you two.. I uh have something to say.

Fireball- what?

Shayla Shayla- it’s about the burning winter…

Iceman- $hit.. not now.. we’re celebrating

Shayla Shayla- no this can’t wait.. thank you.. it saved us all.. just.. be careful how you use it, ok?

(Fireball is at a loss for words.. for a change while iceman just grins)

Iceman- will do!

(Xiahau walks up to Devilamn)

Xiahau– What happened Devilamn- I’m not entirely sure… but.. well.. I don’t know.

Xiahau– ahh.. I see.

NWD- something doesn’t seem right…

Shayla Shayla- what?

NWD- just.. I gotthis nagging feeling that this isn’t over yet.

Fireball- are you kidding? we thrashed em.

NWD-IknowIknow.. it’s just.. well.. something’s not right.

Shayla Shayla- don’t worry about it hon.. we did good.. a lot of good.

NWD- yeah. I supopse so.

(they turn back to look at the horizon, to the future an more importantly.. to the unknown.)

BoB- Well, hell of a fight I’d say.

(Ralph has passed out)

BoB- What a weak hearted man… well, I guess we’ll see you next week… good night all!!!! winner: all of humanity

Lina- hey look!!!

Guyver- the sun? it’s been awhile.

Ryu- they must have won.

Lina-Iknew they would…

Duncan- uh huh..

Saien_c- Hey where’d the cat go?

Duncan- likely, straight into the middle of what’s next.

Jin- what is next?

Lina- that’s a good question.. how about dinner?

Guyver- you would say that.

Ryu- well I am a little hungry

Lina- YES!!! Let’s eat!!


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