Tag Team Tourney

Misu Sisters vs. Civil Justice | Team Rocket vs. Adrenaline Express | Ikari Warriors vs. Ushio and Tora | Black Bitches vs. Mai and Athena | Fro Dawg, Kaede, Joesph Crow vs. n.U.r | Fei vs. Shotori Samurai

*The event starts off showing scenes from the Mega Pay Per View then coming into the arena with thousands of screaming fans in attendence!*

Bob: Hello Everyone and welcome to the New UCTF’s Friday Fury! I’m Bobby Hinden

Ralph: And I’m Ralph Gerrard! Get ready for a great program!!!

*The UCTF’s new intro starts off showing highlights from the New Talent of the UCTF like Kaede, Rofel, Egypt, and Clark to the veteran stars like David GSM, Fei, and the Ikari Warriors. The cameras start rolling back in the arena as a gray mist is released from the turnbuckles as the pyrotechnics explode from the ceiling.*

Ralph: Before we get down to business tonight, the new kid in the UCTF announce team, Scott Williams caught up with the new UCTF President and had a few words with him…

(Earlier Today: Vegeta, Jeice, and Burter are walking through the UCTF hallway and Scott comes running up from behind them)

Scott: umm.. excuse me! President Vegeta?

Vegeta: :| What?

Scott: What are you planning for the UCTF now that you are the president? What are you going to do with all of those belts?

Vegeta: What in the hell do you think I’m going to do with all the belts Jack ass?! I’m going to put them up for grabs!

Scott: oh oh.. uhh… Well, Why is the Mechazilla/Pulsion match going to be held so far away from the Arena?

Vegeta: What are you stupid?!

Scott: I..I’m sorry

Vegeta: Where in the hell did you get those stupid questions from? Who the hell hired you?

Scott: Uhh uhhh.. I’m sorry sir. can I ask one more question?

Vegeta: :|

Scott: This is actually for Jeice and Burter.. why are you guys here in the arena? We thought you..

Burter: SHUT YA DAMN MOUF!

Scott: *shuts his mouth*

(Jeice, Burter, and Vegeta walk away)

Scott: back to you guys… *sighs*

Bob: Man.. I feel sorry for that kid.. I wonder who made up those questions for him??

Ralph: I have no idea.. *hides the question sheet*

Bob: Well, moving on… Our first match for tonight will be the UCTF’s first ever Mecha Match!

Ralph: Yeah! This oughta be cool! Where is it going to be held?

Bob: Tokyo, Japan!

Ralph: Ah man… *chuckles*

Mechazilla vs Pulsion

*The UCTF Satellite Focuses in on Tokyo, Japan and the picture picks up on the Big Screen. Pulsion comes flying from over the horizon and lands in the middle of the street. People see him and start runnin like hell! Behind him in the water. Mechazilla emerges from underneath and makes his way onto the land. Thousands of screaming people begin to flee as the two enormous machines stand across from each other waiting.*

Ralph: I guess the president forgot to inform Tokyo about the match.

Bob: That’s not good for those people……….. OH WELL! Let’s get ready for a brawl!

Ralph: And for old times sake, we are going to watch this battle in it’s original Wide Screen Version!

*Kai finds Mechazilla’s frequency on his communication system*

Kai: Hey, good luck man. This should be interesting. over

Pilot: Heh.. you two.. but you’ll be needing good luck more than me. *turns it off*

*Mechazilla fires his eyelaser blasts at Pulsion. He dodges to the right quickly to avoid it. The stray blasts go into the crowd of people running away and of course, that one woman who never runs away, the one who just stands there screaming like a dumbass gets hit dead on!*

Bob: Ouch!

Ralph: don’t worry bob, she didn’t die, she just vanished into the next dimension!

Bob: Heh…

*Pulsion  runs behind one of the sky scrapers and pushes it over on Mechazilla. Mecha punches the building and it explodes like Micheal Jackson’s hair on that pepsi commercial. Pulsion creates his lance and attacks Mecha.*

Ralph: OH NO! Kai has pulled out the blazing sword!

Bob: Wrong Mech

Ralph: Whoops

*Pulsion swings at Mecha’s head but misses at it does his big tail sweep. Pulsion manages to jump over it, firing it’s plasma cannon.. It connects in Mecha’s chest and sends him through another building, leaving a huge hole behind. Pulsion slices the building in half with his lance and advances towards Mecha. Mecha grabs onto the Tower of Tokyo and pulls it out of the ground! Mechazilla swings the tower around and it catches Pulsion in upper body, sending him down to the ground. Mechazilla jumps ontop of him and gives him the Ultra Stomp!*

Plasma Cannons destroyed.. Plasma Cannons destroyed…

Kai: Shit!

*Pulsion grabs onto Mecha’s foot and trips him up. He gets up and grabs the Huge Tail and begins spinning around, knocking out buildings from every direction then releases! Mecha flies into the atmosphere as Pulsion begins to produce energy waves from his chest*

Bob: I think he’s about to go for the win now!

Ralph: This is cool!

*Pulsion fires his attack into the sky towards Mechazilla. He sees the energy coming towards him and fires the Mega Baster the blast from his mouth and it connects with the waves! The Mega Baster cuts through the energy waves and connects with Pulsion! The area surronding explodes and a massive shockwave runs through the city! When the smoke clears, Pulsion is at the bottom of a crater*

Kai: That was luck! Just wait until I get out of this hole!

…engine failure…engine failure…

Kai: :( Nevermind

Ralph: Well, I guess that makes Mechazilla the winner!

Bob: Hey, that was pretty good for our first mecha match

Ralph: yeah, but I wonder who’s going to take responsibility for the damage?

*Vegeta beeps in*

Vegeta: whoops, did I forget to tell everyone? The Loser of this match has to pay for any damage sustained.. that is all

Ralph: Oh man!

Winner: Mechazilla

Ralph: Awww.. finally we’re back in the arena!

Bob: Not just yet.. we still have another outside fight!

Ralph: Oh? Who is it?

Bob: Don’t you ever read your transcript? It’s

JackTurner vs.C-Murder

Backstreet Brawl

Ralph: Oh yeah.. I have a feeling this one is going to be really really bad!

*The cameras cut to outside the arena in the ghetto neighborhood as Jack Turner leans against the wall smoking a cigarette.  Cmurder is walking down the street through a crowd of people looking for Jack.*

Jack: oh sh*t…. *sees Cmurder and ducks down*

Ralph: ducking down? I don’t see how that’s going to work with his big ass

Bob: Don’t let him hear you say that!

Ralph: He’s all the way out there, he can’t do anything to me

*Jack Turner pulls out a trash can lid and sneaks into the group of people. He nails C-Murder in the back of the head. The crowd turns around and sees the two guys Trading rights and lefts and they surrond them in a circle. Turner picks up Cmurder and throws him into a pile of trash. People on the street get too close to Turner and they get knocked out. Cmurder picks up a PVC pipe from the pile and swings at Turner. Turner ducks and then rams him into the brick wall! C murder starts dropping several elbows on Turner and pushes him off. Cmurder pulls out brass knucks puts them on.*

Jack: Don’t hurt yourself now..LOL

Cmurder: I’m about to hurt you bitch!

*Cmurder swings at Jack but misses and falls back down in the alley. He gets up with a brick in his head and launches it at Turner, it connects right in his forhead and it breaks the skin. Blood begins to trickle down his nose! Cmurder charges in and tries to tackle Turner to the Ground but his gets rabbit punched right in the back of the head! The crowd is still watching the fight and Turner throws Cmurder into  the back of a parked car. The back of the window shatters and Cmurder stumbles into the street. He turns to his right and gets hit by a fu*king bus!

Ralph: WTF?!?!?!?

Bob: Oh man! Cmurder isn’t going to recover from that!

Ralph: *almost pukes*

Winner: Jack Turner

(backstage)

Scott: Mr. Vegeta, Mr. Vegeta!

Vegeta: What do you want now?

Scott: Cmurder has just been hit by a bus!

Vegeta: Oh man.. that’s terrible.. Jeice

Jeice: Yeah?

Vegeta: go to the hospital where he is and fire him

Jeice: It’s done!

(Back in the arena)

Bob: …………………..

Ralph: …damn.

Shingo vs.Dark Knight Proto

*Dark Knight Proto’s theme music starts to play over the pa system.*

Ralph: Finally! an inside match!

Bob: Tonight we are going to have the debut match for Shingo Yabuki

Ralph: I heard that he might be… ya know

Bob: Might be what?

Ralph: Well.. he was stranded on an island with nothing but beautiful chicks that wanted him!

Bob: You know those weren’t really girls

Ralph: They weren’t?

Bob: No, they were all demons

Ralph: Ugh!

*Dkp makes his way down the aisle and gets into the ring.*

Bob: Dkp is looking for his first win tonight and here comes Shingo!

Ralph: He’s a young one isn’t he?

Bob: I think he’s around 17

Ralph: Well, thank goodness he didn’t go through with it. He wouldn’t know what to do!

*Shingo glares over at the commentator table*

Ralph: Damn! did he hear me!?

*Dkp and Shingo get into the ring and the match starts! Proto starts off by firing his Super Blast at Shingo. Shingo runs up the turbuckle and jumps off. The blast hits the top turnbuckle and burns off the padding. Shingo hits the ground and goes a frontwards roll as DKP fires hundreds of stray fireblasts at him. Shingo jumps in the air and connects with his Dynamite Kick,  Dkp falls out of the second rope and hits the floor. Shingo jumps over the top rope but gets blasted back into the ring by Proto’s FreeBird attack!*

Bob: Shingo just took a hard fall from that bird blast!

*Dkp jumps back into the ring and wraps his legs around Shingo’s waist. Shingo lays there helplessly as DKP shoots a blast right into his face!!*

Ralph: Damn! I think it’s over!

Bob: Nope, Shingo is still moving!

Ralph: Yeah, but his face looks like hamburger meat!

*Shingo gets to his feet one more time and hits DKP with a crecent kick. Shingo lands on his neck then kicks back up. Dkp comes off of the ropes and punches him in the jaw! Shingo hits the ground again and his face begins to swell up. DKP fires an iceblast and Shingo slides down and it goes into the crowd! It hits a Mammoth guy in the balcony and turns him into ice. He falls off of the balcony and hits the floor, shattering into hundreds of pieces!*

Ralph: Frozen Hamburgers for everyone!

Bob: That’s cruel! LOL!!!!!

*Shingo jumps to the top rope and hits the blockbuster on DKP! He covers him up and goes for the pin! DKP presses him off  at the 2 count.*

Bob: That was a close one for DKP, Shingo almost snuck away with the victory!

*DKP swings his upward and connects onto Shingo’s chin. Shingo falls into the opposite corner and then fires out! He connects with DKP with a Hyper Tackle! DKP flips him off and shoots off his Rockets. Shingo dodges them but and connects with his Demon Scorcher uppercut! DKP lands on the ropes and fires his Proto Blast. Shingo jumps over it and gives him a few overhead punches followed by a flurry of lefts! Dkp punches Shingo right in the stomach but Shingo continues through and gives him his Burning Attack! Dkp hits the ropes and gets hung up!*

Bob: Dkp is hanging from his neck on the ropes!

Ralph: He can’t get loose!

*The Ref counts him out and Shingo wins!*

Bob: That one could have gone either way! If it wasn’t for the ropes, I think DKP would have taken it!

Ralph: Me too.. I don’t think Shingo could have held out much longer

Winner: Shingo Yabuki

Zack vs.MegamanX

Bob: We have two more debuts out of many tonight on the show!

Ralph: I was looking forward to seeing these two guys fight it out. Zack is a first class Solider, from what I heard, he’s pretty damn handy at a sword.

Bob: I heard the same thing, but this Megaman X kid has a lot of spunk. We both know that he has one hellacious grip!

Ralph: SHUTUP!!! *Thinks back*

(Bob: Megaman’s breaking Uyko’s hand!

Ralph: UCHAAAN!!!

Uyko: I QUIT!)

Ralph: Poor uchan… she’ll bounce back from it!

Bob: Yeah right.. she got fired!

Ralph: What?!?!!?

Bob: Where have you been man!?!?

Ralph: *Starts crying*

*Zack comes running out from behind the curtains like on those final fantasy games with his Buster sword on his back.*

Ralph: How come those final fantasy guys are always running?

Bob: Beats me Ralph

*And from No where, Mega Man X appears in the ring with a flash of light! He lands on the ground and the match starts!*

Ralph: Whoa! talk about an entrance!

Bob: O_O

*Zack pulls out the Buster Sword and does the Braver Slash. MMX blocks the sword with his right arm. Sparks fly through the ring and MMX lands a Shoryuken. Zack does a backflip to recover and lands on one knee. MMX fires an X-buster shot and Zack slices right through it!*

Ralph: I didnt know Zack could do that!

Bob: He can do alot with his Buster Sword…

Ralph: Oh?

Bob: Yeah, check this out, I’ve seen him train before

*Zack swings his sword around and brings it backdown. A huge lightening bolt comes from the sky and hits MMX dead on!*

Ralph: What was that?!

Bob: lightening I believe!

*Mega Man’s circuits get a little scrambled from the bolt which gives Zack enough time to preform the Meteorain attack! About 5 small Meteors fall from the sky towards MMX. Mega man shots his Xbuster super shot which cancels them out. Zack flies across the ring and shoots off his blade beam. Mega man rolls out of the way then fires a Hadouken! The ball of energy hits Zack and he flips over the top rope but lands on the apron. Zack twirls his sword around again, but this time MMX is engulfed in flames.*

Bob: Zack is showcasing his Materia tonight!

Ralph: yeah, but Mega Man has some powerful blasts himself!

*Zack jumps back over the top rope and does his Cross Slash Technique on MMX which paralizes him!  Zack steps back and begins to charge up for some attack! MMX breaks out of it spell at the last second and fires his Xbuster Hyper Shot! Zack gets hit by the beam and the sword flys out of his hand! Zack tries to go for it but Megaman sends his knee right into Zack’s medsection and then they start trading hits*

Ralph: I don’t think Zack’ll be able to fight hand to hand with Mega man!

Bob: yeah, I bet that space aged metal doesn’t feel too well against his skin!

*Zack does a somersault kick that lands to quick hits to Mega Mans head. Zack slides across the mat and grabs a hold of the buster sword! Mega Man fires a plasma cannon but misses as Zack charges up and attacks with the Omni Slash! He hits Mega Man X 15 times with the sword then finishes off with the Braver! Mega man gets blown away and hits the ground outside!*

Bob: Zack used the Omnislash and it’s all over!

Ralph: Omnislash? looked like 16 hits to me.. not one

Winner: Zack

Alex vs.Akuma

Bob: tonight for the first time in singles action will be Dragon Master Alex!

Ralph: Man, I wonder who assigned him this match? He has to face Akuma..

Bob: That’s the way the ball rolls I guess

Ralph: *watches Akuma walk down to the ring* Hey, do you think Akuma wears contacts?

Bob: I doubt it.. why?

Ralph: I just saw a Limp Bizkit video where they guy had eyes like him

Bob: Maybe he was a fan. Alright, both participants are in the ring!

*Alex circles the ring as Akuma stands there calmly awaiting the bell.*

Ralph: Alex looks a little excited for his first match

Bob: I would be too, especially if I had to fight Akuma, that crazy bastard

(DING!)

*Alex attacks with a rising uppercut but Akuma ducks. Alex’s missed uppercut leaves him open for a spit second

and that’s all that Akuma needs. He does a dragon uppercut himself and connects right on the butt of Alex’s chin!

He falls back and lands on his neck! Alex falls back and lands on his neck*

Bob: Akuma gets a clean hit on Alex and he’s down!

Ralph: I wouldn’t be suprised if he didn’t get up from that Robert

Bob: Robert?

*Alex returns to his feet and tries to take Akuma’s head off with the sword! Akuma ducks and the sword takes off

a locke of his hair! Akuma looks down  and picks up the patch of hair*

Akuma: You just had to do that.. .didn’t you?

Ralph: He looks a little mad about that hair thing

Bob: yeah, I think I can see a tear about to come out of his beady eyes

*Akuma fires a hadouken at Alex but misses. He jumps into the air and releases three more at Alex. Alex gets

away from two but the third hits him. He falls on his chest and Akuma almost lands a knee on his spine! Alex rolls

out of the way and onto the outside! Akuma does a baseball slide to kick Alex but misses.. he slides out of the ring

and lands on his feet, but Alex is waiting and clotheslings him to the ground. Alex stomps him on the chest but

Akuma grabs his leg and sweeps him to the ground. Alex picks up his sword from the apron and swings at Akuma!

He gets out of the way and backs up!*

Bob: Alex almost took Akuma’s head!

Ralph: I thought this was the uctf, not the highlands of scotland!

Bob: I guess you’ve gotta do what you gotta do to win

*Alex gives Akuma the power sweep but he recovers by doing a backwards cartwheel. Alex jumps into the ring

and Akuma follows firing a Hadouken  into Alex’s back. Alex hits the ropes then gets dropkicked to the back of

the neck!*

Bob: Akuma getting two big hits on Alex! He’s starting to stagger!

*Alex gets a hard roundhouse to connect with Akuma that sends him to the ground! Akuma gets back to his knees

and bounces off of the ropes! Akuma jumps into the air to avoid another swipe from Alex. He spins around and

connects with a Hurricane Kick! Alex spins around and hits the ground face first!*

Ralph: I think it’s over!

*The ref counts… 1..2..3!!!!!!!!!*

WInner: Akuma

Bob: Our Next Debuter will be The Irregular hunter, Fathom against Morrigan

Ralph: Let’s hope Morrigan doesn’t trip and fall this time

Bob: LOL!!!!

(Backstage, Mick Foley is talking to Jin)

Mick: Hey Jinny Pooh.. you know.. if you want me to cheat in this match… ya know.. hehe

Jin: No thanks man.. I’ll win this one on my own. You just count to three whenever I beat her ass!

Mick: *shrugs* no problem

*Jin walks away*

(Back in the arena)

Ralph: Well then! Jin had an opportunity to cheat and he didn’t!

Bob: I guess he wants to win this one on his own eh?

Morrigan vs.Fathom

*Morrigan come down to the ring her wings fully spread. Fathom is in the Corner charging up both ladys bow to

each other then the bell sounds.*

Ralph: Well, good sportsman ship tonight I see

Bob: Ralph, not every one here has grudes against each other!

Fathom: It’s a pleasure to have the honor to fight you…

Morrigan: Bite me Bitch!! or will it be me bitting you *she laughs evily*

Bob: O_O

Ralph: You were saying?!

Bob: Wow.. the only one who would like hearing that is Marv Albert!

Marv: YEEEES!

Bob: WTF?

*As soon as the bell rings, Morrigan Immedeatly goes for a high kick. Fathom stumbles back Morrigan flaps her

wings creating a wind that knocks fathom off of her feet. Fathom get up unsteady, and does a drop kicks Morrigan.

Morrigan looks up at her wildly, She sweep fathom, and come up with an uppercut knocking Fathom into the

ropes. Fathom blast her with a ki blast. Morrigan assends into the air, her wings outstretched. Morrigan goes

airborn with a spear.*

Bob: Wow! They’re getting it on!

Ralph: I see that Morrigan is staying air borne in this match to avoid any… slip ups..

Bob: hhehe

*Fathom rolls out of the ring. Morrigan glares at her and jumps over the top rope with a spin kick. She plus

Fathom by the head and throws her back into the ring.*

Morrigan: I havent had a soul in over 3 years!! How about I take yours. You are young and cute!

Bob: *shivers*

*Fathom’s blinks back. Morrigan rushes into her and bangs her head into the turnbuckle. SHe then turns fathom

around fathom Recovers with a knee to Morrigan stomach. Fathom throws Morrigan into the center of the ring,

and Pins her. before the ref can even come over. Morrigan puts Fathom in the crab. Morrigan then twists her over

she grabs her to her feet, and Choke Slams Fathom to hell!*

Ralph: It looks like it’s over!!!

*Morrigan rolls on top of her and 1……2….3!*

Bob: Morrigan wins!!! and what’s this?

*Taiyou Comes running down the asile and Jumps into the ring, and Grabs Morrigans other hand, He escorts her

out of the ring.*

Ralph: What’s with that? Morrigan is old enough to be his ancestor!

Bob: LOL!

Ralph: She’s so old, Jesus signed her highschool yearbook!

Bob: LOL!!!

Ralph: She’s so old…

Bob: That’s enough!

Ralph: sorry

Winner: Morrigan

(Backstage in the Black Paladins Locker Room)

Carbunkle: You sure you want to go through with this Hystalin?

Hystalin: Of course!

Carbunkle: Ok.. but if you need me, you know where to find me! *vanishes*

*Hystalin continues Lacing up her boots*

(Back in the arena)

*Badd Crew’s theme music starts off and Ryuhaku Todoh comes walking from behind the curtain being followed

by Jack Turner, who has a bandage on his forehead from the last match.*

Ralph: Hey! Our first tag team match of the night!

Bob: Yup, these two teams were squeezed in at the last second, but they still weren’t able to make it to the tag team

tourny.

Ralph: Oh well, maybe they’ll get to face the champions if they do good tonight

Badd Crew vs.Clark and Edge

*Clark and Edge come out next, but Turner and Todoh don’t even let them get down the aisle! They brawl all the

way back behind the curtains! A few cameramen scurry to the back to catch the action*

Ralph: Is this a hardcore match?

Bob: I guess it is now!

*The cameras switch backstage right when Turner is stuffing Edge into a trash can! Clark throws Todoh into a

brick wall and pulls and picks up a lead pipe!. Turner puts a trash can on the Edge’s head then gives him a flying

lariat! Clark tries to strike with his sword but Todoh pulls out his at the last second and blocks!*

Bob: This is unexpected!!

*Turner takes Edge over to the pay phones*

Turner: *singing* C-O-L-L-E-C-T!! SAVE A BUCK OR TWO OR THREE!

BLOAW!!!!

Ralph: LOL!!!!!!! Edge just got hit with a pay phone!

*Clark knocks the blade out of Todoh’s hand and starts nailing him with the pipe! Todoh gets a low blow! Clark

starts staggering away and Todoh hits him with an axe kick! Turner grabs Edge and throws him into the ladies

bathroom!*

Random Girl: AAAHH!!

Turner: Shut ya damn mouf! No one wants to see yo ugly ass anyway! Get out! All of you get out!

*all of the girls start running out*

Ralph: O_O! Women do that in the bathroom!?

*Turner takes Edge’s head and gives him a swirlie! outside.  Clark and Todoh are beating the hell out of each

other in the parking lot! Todoh picks up Clark and throws him into a windsheild, shattering it!*

Ralph: Oh no! That was Vegeta’s car!

Bob: Ouch.. oh well, he can fly

Ralph: I think Clark is out!

Bob: Edge is out too! So I guess  that makes Todoh and Turner the winners!

Winners: Badd Crew

Bob: Now, it’s time for a score to be settled!

Ralph: Hystalin has been wanting this match for a long time.. well, she’s finally got it!

*”Hardcore Legends” starts playing over the arena as Mick Foley comes out wearing a filthy shirt that he painted strips on himself! Terry Funk is walking behind him and they are getting a HUGE ovation from the crowd!*

Ralph: Say.. how did Terry Funk and Mick Foley get to come here tonight? I’m suprised Vince Mcmahon would let them

Bob: Well, Terry Funk is retired from wrestling, and Mick Foley would just choke out Vince if he had anything to say about it

Ralph: Oh.. well in that case! Let’s get ready for

Jin Saotome vs Hystalin

*”Blue Monday” begins to play as Jin Saotome comes walking out.  Bandages can still be seen a little under his

clothes as he jumps over the top rope.*

Ralph: bob, tell me again, why are there two different referees tonight?

Bob: One will referee the match, while the other watches ringside just incase someone interferes

Ralph: I see!

*Hystalin’s theme music starts up and she walks to the ring with purpose!*

Bob: She looks ready to fight

*Hystalin jumps in the ring and swings at Jin! Jin ducks out of the way and Hystalin hits the corner. Jin starts

sending a flurry of rights into the jaw of Hystalin. She kicks him in the chest and he staggers back*

Ralph: She’s using his injury to her advantage

Bob: That’s a good idea, she’s going to need everything she can!

*Jin leans on the ropes holding his chest. Hystalin runs in to attack him but Jin pulls the rope down on her and she

goes flying out of the ring! Hystalin hits the floor hard as Jin goes to the opposite side of the ring and gets a chair!

Hystalin finally gets back to the apron and gets met with cold steel to her face! Hystalin flies off of the apron and

hits the steel barrier chest first!*

Ralph: Oh man.. that had to hurt!!! What’s Hystalin going to do now?

Bob: We’ll see how she can get back into the ring with Jin holding the chair in his hand!

*Hystalin starts chanting something and the arena starts to feel cool… Hystalin vanishes and out from the sky, a

huge water dragon appears in front of Jin!*

Bob: It’s Leviathan!!!!

Jin: Oh shit!

*Leviathan screams and a Huge Tidal Wave comes towards Jin! Jin performs his Saotome Typhoon and cuts

through wave without gettin crushed! Mick Foley and Terry Funk jump out of the ring and get under it so they

won’t Die! The wave hits the fans and sends them flying all over the place!*

Ralph: the poor fans.. now they look like they’ve been to a Gallagher Show!

*Jin falls to his knees breathing heavily and Hystalin reappears in the ring! As Mick Foley climbs back into the ring, she lands a quick kick to the chest again that knocks Jin on his ass. He gets up again and she goes for a clothesline. Jin catches her up and gives her the Whirlwind Breakdown on the back of her neck! He bounces back up and gives her a knee drop on her chest! Jin picks up his chair and goes to the top rope!*

Ralph: What is he going to do now?

Bob: He’s going for the Arabian Facebuster! and if he hits it, this match is over!

*Jin jumps off of the top with the chair!*

Hystalin: Enchanted Inferno!!!

*Hystalin blasts Jin with red hot flames that sends him out of the ring! Jin starts to get back up as Hystalin leaps

over the top rope to hit him! Jin swings the chair and hits her over the head with it again! After hitting the ground,

Jin grabs the steel steps and takes them apart. Setting one over by Hystalin, he sets her up for the Thunderfire

Bomb! Just as he picks her up, she fires her Angel’s Blaze into his face and knocks him into the crowd! The back

of Hystalin’s head hits the steel steps and she falls out!

Ralph: That desperation move by Hystalin just saved her ass!

Bob: yeah, but the back of her head still hit the steps! She’s out like a light!

Ralph: That’s true, but Jin is out too! He just got hit with the Angel’s Blaze at point black range!

Bob: I don’t think Mick wants to count either of them out.. but they’re not moving!

*Mick checks to see if either of them can fight.. then finally, rings the bell!*

Ralph: A draw! How can things be any less solved?!

Winner: Draw

Bob: oh boy.. The first match of the Tag Team Tournament

Ralph: YEAH YEAH YEAH!!!

Bob: I think I’m going to take my break now. I’ll let Scott come out and commentate with you, alright?

Ralph: YEAHYEAHYEAH!!!

Bob: *sighs*

*Bob leaves and Scott arrives at the set*

Scott: Wow! I get to call this match!

Ralph: Shutup and let me call this match rookie!

Scott: Sorry

Misu Sisters vs Civil Justice

*Tira and Chocolate come down to the ring dressed in their hunter outfits*

Ralph: Ladies and Gentlemen, the new president of the UCTF has ruled this match a Submissions match!

Scott: That means that the only way you can win is if your opponent submits!

Ralph: Hahaha! This should be great! How will Cammy and Chun-li be able to make those S&M freaks say “I

quit?!” We’ll see!

*Coming down to ring side is Chun-li Escorted by Ryu and Ken they help her into the ring,  Right after that

Cammy comes Down to ring side Escorted by Venom. Cammy jumps in the ring and takes her place next to

Chun-li. Venom, Ryu, and Ken are glaring at each other!*

Scott: I don’t like the looks of this! a riot could start at anytime!

Ralph: Will you shut up about that?! It’s the misu sisters vs. civil justice time!

*Tira and Chocolate watch them intensely. as soon as the bell rings, and the 4 women go at it. Cammy snatches

Tira and Sankyo throws her. Mean while Chocolate has Chun-Li backed up into the turnbuckle, Chocolate has her

arms pinned behind her back, and rips open Chun-li’s kimono Exposing her breast partially. Chun-li Head butts

her, and Chocolate falls on her ass. Chun-li comes around her, and puts her in a head lock. Meanwhile Tira has

Managed to rip a hole in Cammy’s body suit. Tira has her whip around Cammys neck. She drags Cammy over to

the ropes Cammy Kicks up to her feet and over takes Tira with a killer bee assault. Tira goes down. Cammy flips

her on to her stomach ans bend Tira’s legs towards her head.*

Tira: Ouch!!!

Cammy: You give up??

Tira: No… Just a little Higher

Cammy: damnit!!!

*She tugs hard at Tira’s Leg untill her feet are touching her head.*

Tira: Come on Cammy… Fuck me like the whore you are!!

Cammy: WHORE??… thats it!!!

*As Lets go of Tira’s Leg, Chun-Li does a German Suplex on Chocolate.. A black dildo flies over to where Tira is.

Tira snatches it up quickly as Cammy flips her over and Pulls her to her knees.*

*Cammy Slaps her in the face with tremendous force.*

Cammy: Whats my Name Bitch??

Tira: OH YES CAMMY!!!! SLAP ME HARDER I HAVE BEEN A BAD GIRL!

*Tira gets off her knees to her feet. She elbows cammy to the face, Cammys  tumbles back and her back touches

the back of chocolate. Chocolate turns around and Grabs Cammy around the waist.

*Venom climbs on the ropes to pull Cammy out of the ring but Ryu and Ken start attacking him! They start

battling on the entrance way!*

Scott: See!! I told you!!

Ralph: Damnit! They’re interupting this match!

*”Hate Me now starts up over the arena and the president comes walking out!*

Ralph: What the hell?! Vegeta is out!

*Vegeta puts space between Venom, Ryu, and Ken and tell them to leave the ringside area! Venom puts his hand

on Vegeta’s shoulder! Vegeta turns around slowly and looks at Venom! Venom let’s go then all three men leave

the ringside.  Vegeta turns around and walks back to the locker room*

Ralph: YEEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!!!!!!! Now we can get back to our match!

Chocolate: Lay it on her Sweety!

*Tira rushes over quickly and rips Cammy’s clothes to shred. Chun-Li is on the top rope, she does a summersault

drop kick Which was ment for chocolate, Chocolate Quickly turns arouns with Cammy still in her arms, Cammy

gets the  kick right in her chest. Cammy falls over ontop of Chocolate, Tira spears chun-li into the ropes. Chun-li

seems to be out. Chocolate has managed to pin Cammy down by the hands. Tira come over swinging the dildo

wildly. She bends over Cammy and starts rubbing on her bare breast.Cammy’s Face goes red, she

is infuriated but yet hight intrigued and turned on.*

Tira: Let me take you please??

Cammy: HELL NO YOU CRAZY BITCH!!

Tira: aww dont be like that!

*She takes out her whip and ties it around her neck, and ties the other half to the Turnbuckle. Chocolate begins to

suck on Cammy’s Breast. Biting at her nipples. Cammy kicks wildly but tira restrains her by the knees. Tira

Spreads her legs apart and plays with her clit deviously.*

Chocolate: Agree to the f*ck!!

*Cammy shakes her head yes.*

Cammy: I WILL WEAR YOU OUT!!!!! I WONT GIVE IN!!!!

*Tira Pimp slaps Cammy*

Tira: Shut up bitch and enjoy this.

*Tira burries her head between Cammys legs, sucking ferousiosly at her love muscles nibbling on her clit. Chocoalte takes the dildo and shoves it in Cammys mouth. Cammy spits it out.*

Tira: Go work on Chun-li Chocolate!

Chocolate: Yes yes!!

*Chocolate runs over to Chun-li who is just beginning to get up. The referee  is bent over Tira and Cammy in the

corner*

Referee: DO you give up??

Cammy: NEVER!!!!!!

*Cammy’s starts to cumm all over Tira’s mouth Tira slurps it up indulgently. Tira massages Cammys pussy with her hands while kissing at her belly button  Cammy giggles slightly. Then Tira grabs for the Dildo Cammy Spew over with Love Juices it leaks all on the ring and its splurts out like pee, The referee catches Cumm in his Eye, he goes wild and curses*

Referee: AHH I CANT SEE!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAHHHHH!!!

Ralph: Oh no! The ref is out! I’m gonna go and help out!

Scott: I don’t think so!

*Tira slides the dildo into Cammy and begins to fuck her, With each stroke Cammy Moans loudly. Chun-li is finally to her feet. She see’s Cammy and Tiram she turns to her left and chocolate is there cracking her whip*

Chocolate:Time to play chunny!!

Chun-li:THere is no way!!!

Cammy Moans Loud as hell when tira clutches her left nipples between her teeth.

Chun-li: DONT GIVE IN CAMMY! …. we gotta win this.

*Chun-li does a spin kick to Chocolate, Chocolate cathes her foot with the whip and pulls her in towards her. Chun-li spits in her face, and she gladly licks the spit up*

Chocolate: You will give in to Me!!

*Chun-li Grabs chocolate by the throat. And Kisses her Nothing but tongue. They back up into the Turn buckle.

Chun-li grabs the whip from her hands and ties it to Chocolates wrist and neck. Chun-li puts her hand in

Chocolates Juicy web of Love, and Starts to tickle her muscle like crazy. Chun-li does it with such speed and

Agility that the process of orgasam is in increased. Chun-li’s hand is drenched with her Juices. and she continues

to tickle.*

Chocolate: OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Chocolate submerges into a high powered Orgasam. The referee wipes his eyes and squints to see whats going on

He runs over to Chun-li and Chocolate.*

Referee: YOu give up Chocolate??

Chocolate:….. MMMM UGHHH AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chocolate starts to convulse and Chun-li keeps playing with her clit.

Chun-li: Give Up bitch!!! Give up!!!

Referee: You give up?

Chocolate: y….. Ye…….yessssssssss YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS I GIVE

UP!!!!!

*At the sound of Chocolate saying Yes. Tira Jumps of Cammy who has been shaking in violent orgasmic spasams,,

her eyes barel open She is soaking wet with cumm and so is the ring around her. The Referee goes to pull chun-li’s

Hand in the air anousing Civil Justice as the winners, but he changes his  mind and pats her on the back*

Scott: Oh man! I think I’m gonna go get my crabs, herpes, and pennicillin shots now!! *staggers off*

Ralph: ENCORE ENCORE!!!!!!!!

Winner: Civil Justice

Bob: alright.. I’m back.

Ralph: Bobby you sure missed it!

Bob: DON’T tell me about it!

Bob:   Who’s next on the list?

Ralph:  Let me see… we have…

Adrenaline Express Vs. Team Rocket

Bob:  What?  Team Rocket?

Ralph:  Uh-huh.

Bob:  Oh boy.

Ralph:  Rumor has it that James has been seen in public, wearing a sailor scout costume.

Bob:  Now that is scary!

Ralph:  It sure is!

Bob:  Thanx for the mental picture Ralph!

Ralph:  I’m only saying what was told to me by reliable sources.

Bob:  Where’s AX?

(The song, “Right Now” by Van Halen begins playing.  Sailor Bowser & Midnight Rider makes their way to the ring with their motorcycle.)

Ralph:  What an entrance!

Bob:  That must be their new entrance.

Ralph:  Uh-huh.

Bob:  Now all we need is that team of no-hopers, Team Rocket.

(A puff of smoke burts in one corner of the area.  When the smoke subsides, we see Jessie & James… dressed in sailor scout fukus!)

Jessie:  Prepare for trouble!

James:  Make it double!

Jessie:  To protect the world from devastation!

James:  To unite all peoples within our nation!

Jessie:  To denounce the evils of truth & love!

James:  To extend our reach to the stars above!

Jessie:  SAILOR JESSIE!

James:  SAILOR JAMES!

Jessie:  Team Rocket — blast off at the speed of light!

James:  Surrender now, or prepare to fight!

(Bob & Ralph throws up.)

Ralph:  Oh man, now this is sick!

Bob:  I’ve seen lots of shocking events in the UCTF, but this could be the worst!

Ralph:  I know… what’s really sick is… James looks… pretty!

Bob:  Now  you’re really scaring me!

(DING!)

Jessie:  Well, who shall be first…

James:  …to face the Sailor Rockets?

Sailor Bowser:  Those fukus look so good on you!

Midnight Rider:  They make you look much better!

(Adrenaline Express bursts out with laughter.)

Jessie:  Laugh at us, will you?

James:  Remember the saying… “he who laughs last, laughs best”?

Jessie:  We will have the last laugh!

James:  So, HA HA HA to you!

Sailor Bowser:  Enough… BOWSER CRESCENT MOON CUTTER!!!!!

Bob:  Whoa!  Sailor Bowser makes the first move with her “Bowser Crescent Moon Cutter” technique.

Ralph:  Good thing Team Rocket dodged out of the way just in time.

Bob:  If it did hit, we’d have one hell of a mess in the ring.

Ralph:  Oh yes…

James:  I’m going first… Electrabuzz… GO!

(James throws a pokeball… out comes… Electrabuzz!)

BUZZ!  BUZZ!

James:  Electrabuzz, use your Thundershock!

BUZZ!

(James’ Electrabuzz zaps Sailor Bowser & Midnight Rider.  Adrenaline Express survives, but they are slightly singed from the thundershock.)

James:  That sure did it!  Good job Electrabuzz!

BUZZ!

Sailor Bowser:  BOWSER LASER STORM FLASH!!!

Bob:  Look at this!

Ralph:  After getting shocked by James’ Electrabuzz, Sailor Bowser counters with her Boswer Laser Storm Flash!

Bob:  Looks like James’ electrabuzz is out cold.

James:  Electrabuzz?

BUZZ!  (passes out)

Jessie:  My turn!  Dodrio… go!

(Jessie throws a pokeball and out goes… Dodrio!)

DO!  DO!  DRIIIIIIIIO!

(Midnight Rider turns his staff into a whip and trips the dodrio with it.)

DRIIIIIIIIIO!

Midnight Rider:  Stupid bird!

Jessie:  Fly Dodrio, fly!

DODRIIIIIO!

(Jessie’s dodrio takes flight… sort of.)

Midnight Rider:  FAN DART TOSS!

Jessie:  Dodrio, agility, now!

(Jessie’s Dodrio dodges all of Midnight Rider’s fandarts.)

Jessie:  Good, now use your Drill Peck!

(Jessie’s Dodrio uses its Drill Peck on Midnight Rider, knocking him to the ground.)

Jessie:  Wonderful!  My Dodrio did it!

James:  Our pokemon are so powerful!

Sailor Bowser:  Forget about me?

James:  I can handle this one… WEEZING, GO!

(James throws a pokeball and out comes… WEEZING!)

WEEEEEZING!

James:  Weezing, we have one more to beat this one, so use your sludge attack on both of them!

WEEZING!

(James’ Weezing inundates both Sailor Bowser & Midnight Rider with its sludge.)

Bob:  Now that’s disgusting!

Ralph:  You said it.  Now we have to the ring cleaned from all this toxic waste!

Bob:  I can smell it from over here!  YECK!

Sailor Bowser:  Grrrrr… YOU SLIMED ME!

James:  Looks like we angered her.  Weezing, use your poison gas!

WEEEEZING!!!!!

(James’ Weezing blasts both Sailor Bowser & Midnight Rider with poison gas, hampering AX’s vision.)

James:  Good job!  (lights a match)  Now for the coup de grace!

(James drops a lit match in the sludge, setting Sailor Bowser & Midnight Rider on fire!)

Bob:  What the hell?

Ralph:  Hey!  He can’t do that!

Bob:  He can do anything.  It’s the UCTF!  In here, anything goes.

Jessie:  Now I shall finish this!  Dragonaire, go!

(Jessie throws a pokeball and out comes… Dragonaire!)

DRAGONAAAAAAIRE!

Jessie:  Dragonaire, use your Water Gun!

(Jessie’s Dragonaire uses the Water Gun technique, putting out some of the fire.  The rest of the flames burn out and what’s left is Sailor Bowser & Midnight Rider… alive, singed, and out cold!)

Jessie:  We did it!

James:  Team Rocket, the ultimate pokemon tag team champions of all time, has won again!

Jessie:  It feels so good to win… even if it was done fairly.

James:  Now for the finishing touch… SAILOR HOMO ROSE SHOWER!!!

(James throws many roses, all of them land on the ring.  From above, the roses’ alignment is in the shape of an “R”)

Bob:  Look at this!

Ralph:  …and I was expecting Team Rocket to blast off again…

Bob:  This is just too weird.

Ralph:  Who would expect Team Rocket to win not one, but two fights?!

Bob:  Not me.

Winner:  Team Rocket

Ikari Warriors vs.Ushio and Tora

*Ushio and Tora’s music starts up as they start making their way down to the ring. The Ikari warriors come from

behind the curtains and attack them from behind! Clark starts beating Ushio in the back with a Kendo stick all the

way down to the ring!*

Bob: The Ikari warriors didn’t even wait! They have something to prove tonight!

Ralph: They’ve been pissed off ever since their loss to Ushio and Tora a few weeks ago!

*Clark throws Ushio into the ring and attacks him violently as Tora continues to snap at Ralf’s arm*

Ralph: Ralf better watch out! Tora looks hungry!!!

*Tora bites Ralf’s arm and starts shaking his head back to rip away at the flesh and bone! Clark comes from

behind and nails Ushio in the back of the head with a Kendo Stick! Ushio jumps on Ralf’s back with the beast

spear. Ralf spins his body around into the fireman’s carry position then gives him the Northern Lights Bomb!

Ushio bounces out of the ring!*

Bob: Uh oh! Tora’s the only one left!

*Tora goes after Ralf’s already lacerated arm again! Clark heads him off at the pass and hits him with a with a

powerful shoulder tackle in the ribs! Tora gets picked up and they put him in the Ikari Death Drop! Clark covers!*

1…….2……..3!!! It’s over!

Ralph: Damn that was quick!

Bob: Ushio and Tora had been laxxing after their last win with the Ikari warriors!

Ralph: Ralf better tend to that arm.. it looks pretty bad!

Winner: Ikari Warriors

Black Bitches VS.Mai and Athena

Bob: The last match for the first round of the Tag Team Tourny!

Ralph: This oughta be a slobber knocker!

Bob: Have you ever heard of copyright infringement?

Ralph: What’s that?

*Mai and Athena, come down to the ring and wait patiently for the Black Bitches.*

Bob: another debuting match tonight in the UCTF! They got picked by the president at the last second, let’s see if

they can use this opportunity and win against the black bitches tonight!

*The Bitches come down the Aisle and jump into the ring,  ready to fight! Athena And Mai stare at them closely.*

*DING!*

Hystalin: Enchanted Blizzard!!!

Ralph: Whoa! no waisting time!

*Mai and Athena jump out of the way. Mai rushes into Naga, and Hystalin and Athena go at it. Athena gives

Hystalin a hop kick. Hystalin recovers with an elbow to Athena’s Nose. Mai puts Naga into a shoulder throw!*

Hystalin: Enchanted Thunder!!!

*Hystalin directs her Enchanted Thunder at both Athena and Mai. They get the full affect of the Lightening

energy! Mai and Athena wobble and they fall to the ground.*

Ralph: If you ask me.. I’d say that Hystalin is still sore over her earlier match!

Bob: Same here!

*Mai spears Naga and does a leg lock slam. Mean while Athena has Hystalin in the booty bounce. Athena then

body slams her with a Psychic throw!*

Ralph: Uhh.. what was that move that Athena just did?!

Bob: Nevermind it and watch the fight Bob

*Naga drop Kicks Mai to the back of the head and then Fires a Fire arrow at her, Mai gets hit in the back and her

clothes start to burn up, she drops on the floor and rolls around the ring untill the flames are out. *

Ralph: Stop, Drop, and Roll! LOL!

Bob: You’re gonna get hurt one of these days talking like that!

Ralph: ahh.. they can’t hear me

Bob: but they can watch the video tape!

Ralph: O_O

*Naga does a leg drop across her chest. Athena has Hystalin in a head lock. Hystalin and bites Athena’s arm,.

Athena drops her. Hystalin grabs her by the head and slams her face into the floor. Over head flys the body of Mai

into the turn buckle and Naga follows up with a tackle, and then repeadtely rushes her shoulders into the

midesection.*

Bob: Wow, these women are getting rough!

Ralph: you didn’t know females were more aggressive than men? ^_^ That’s why I love them

Bob: :|

*Athena is at her feet again. Hystalin Drop kicks her in the chest. Athena flys over the ropes. Hystalin scrambles

after her. Mai does an upwards flame kick to Naga’s face, Naga falls backwards but kicks up as soon as she falls

down. Athena jumps back in the ring but Hystalin grabs her by the foot and drags her down into the ropes. Naga

uppercuts Mai in the jaw.Mai’s head flys back wildly.. Mai counter attacks with her Fan dive from the top rope.

Naga Kicks her off easily. Athena and Hystalin are back in the ring. Athen swings at Hystalin with the Psycho

sword. Mai back flips over Naga and Is standing Next to Athena. Hystalin and Naga are to there feet. Hystalin

looks at Naga and nods. Hystalin and Naga run up on Athena and Mai and do a double choke slam from hell!!!*

Bob: A new tag team move by the Black Bitches!!!

* Both girls are spwarled out on the floor.*

Hystalin: That’s it!! ETERNAL LIGHT!!!!!!!!!

*Athena flips up infront of Mai.*

Athena: Not so fast!!! REFLECTOR SHEILD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hystalin: What?!?!!?

*Hystalin’s spell is reversed!!!! Hystalin and Naga get bombarded by the bright light. Athena sweeps Naga and Mai jumps on top!

1….2….3…..!!!

Ralph: No way!!! Hystalin got hit with her own move!

Bob: What an upset! That was amazing!!!

Winners: Mai and Athena

Fro Dawg, Kaede, Joesph vs. Wiegraf, Rofel, Vormav

Ralph: Now we’re getting to the big matches!

Bob: Yeah, I think this match is the first of it’s kind here in the uctf!

Ralph: What are the rules?

Bob: Well, it’s just like a regular 6 man tag match, but the only way one team can win is by pinning all three of of

their opponents!

*Three members of the n.U.r…. Wiegraf, Rofel, and Vormav come out from behind the curtains and make their

way down the ramp.*

Ralph: Hey, aren’t these guys like against the UCTF?

Bob: I’m not sure, they are apart of the new Uctf revolution, so I guess they are with us

Ralph: hmm… interesting. What do you think their chances are against these next gentlemen?

Bob: I saw this match can go either way

*”NWNW starts playing and out comes Kaede, Fro Dawg and Joesph Crow from the back*

Bob: I’ve never seen so much young talent in the ring for a long time!

Ralph: This match is going to be fast paced! I can tell!

*Fro Dawg and Wiegraf get into the ring first off. Fro dawg connects with a rekka ken which sends Wiegraf into

the the corner. Fro dawg bounces off of the ropes and grabs him up in a head lock followed by a big Bulldog!

Vormav gets on the ropes and hits Fro with a spinning heel kick! Rofel jumps on the ring and lands a leg drop on

him. Kaede comes in and hits Rofel in the side of the head with a Dynamite Kick! Joesph Crow turns Wiegraf

around and gives him a jumping Powerbomb!*

Ralph: Hey! Isn’t that Burter’s move?

Bob: I guess Crow is a fan

Frodawg: Ok.. let’s see if I can do this shit again… Kame…Hame……… HA!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bob: Fro Dawg does a Kamehameha wave?!?!!? It connects with Rofel!

*Rofel starts staggering crouches over from the blast ! Kaede comes off the top rope with a move similar to the

Fame Asser and connects!*

1…2…3!!!!!!!!!

Ralph: Rofel is gone!!

Bob: It’s now two on three!

*Wiegraf clotheslines Joesph Crow over the top rope. Kaede comes from behind and hits him with a Lightening

Punch to the kidney!! Wiegraf bends backwards and Frodawg hits a reverse Ddt! Joey gets to the apron to get in,

but Rofel grabs his feet and holds on to them from under the ring! The ref counts Joey out of the match!*

Ralph: what?!

Bob: Joey couldn’t get in the ring because of Rofel! Smart play by n.U.r! Now it’s back to 2 on 2!

*Vormav grabs Kaede from behind and puts him in a sleeper hold. Kaede rams him into the corner then gives him

a shoulder throw! Fro Dawg catches him around the neck and follows through with a neck breaker! Vormav hits

the ground as Kaede comes off the top with a moonsault and connects!!!*

1…2…3!!!!

Bob: 2 on 1!! Wiegraf is all alone with Fro Dawg and Kaede!

Ralph: Look who’s coming in from behind!

*Nighthawk, Kamikazi, and the rest of the n.U.r. come running in before Fro and Kaede can finish off Wiegraf!

The attack them from behind and pull out Wiegraf! The ref calls for the bell!*

Ralph: n.U.r saves Wiegraf!!

Bob: and it’s a good thing! Wiegraf was done for!

Winner: Joesph Crow, Fro Dawg, Kaede by DQ

Bob: Hey, that match was pretty good! and I’m sure the rivalry between those two teams are no where from being

finished!

Ralph: That’s right! I hear it’s time for another first here in the uctf! The gauntlet match!

Bob: personally, I think Fei has a few screws loose if you ask me. He has to go against EVERY member of the

UCTF!

Ralph: Hold up! I just got a memo from Executive Booker Burter

Bob: He’s a booker?

Ralph: I guess so.. the memo says that Fei won’t be going against the ENTIRE stable, just four members, and those

four members are Galford, Hanzo, Genjuro and of course, Jubei.

Bob: Wow.. that gives him a better shot at winning, but still… his chances are TOO slim!

Fei vs. Shotori Samurai: Fei vs. Galford

*Fei makes his way down to the ring and gets in with a look of concern on his face. Shotori Samurai’s theme song

comes on…. Jubei, Hanzo, Galford and Genjuro come walking out then stop. Galford makes his way down to the

ring while the others watch him. He slides under the ropes and Fei waists no time attacking him! He stops him in

the head several times then picks him back up. Galford punches him in the stomach then throws him into the

corner. Fei starts kicking him in the chest the flies out of the corner with a clothesline! Fei bounces off of the ropes

and goes for a leg drop! Galford moves out of the way. Galford gets back up and puts on a blatant choke hold!*

Bob: I hope Fei doesn’t use all his energy from the start, he still has THREE men to go..

Ralph: and that’s ONLY if he gets past Galford!

*Fei kicks Galford away then rolls two his feet, Galford flies back and lands on the turnbuckle, Fei hits the ropes

and sweeps Galford up! he lands right on the turnbuckle… GROIN FIRST. Fei grabs him by the head then gives

him an inverted ddt from the top rope! He wraps Galford up!*

1………..2………….3!!!

Fei vs. Hanzo

Bob: That was smart! he rolled Galford up so he had no where to go!

Ralph: Hanzo is in the ring!

*Fei turns around and gets a flying knee right to the mouth! Fei almost falls out of the ring but Hanzo grabs him

around the neck and starts punching him in the stomach  Hanzo throws Fei into the turnbuckles. Fei falls to his

knees onto the second rope just as Hanzo jumps ontop of him in a bronco buster type move, only with Fei facing

chest first into the turnbuckle.*

Ralph: Hanzo is keeping on him!

Bob: Good idea by Hanzo…

*Hanzo is still sitting on Fei in the corner, he is bouncing up and down.. focusing the pressure on Fei’s chest and

neck! Fei somehow gets strength from within and gets on his knees! Hanzo starts punching him on the head but

Fei stands up fully! Fei backs away from the corner and falls back. Hanzo hits the ground and Fei’s head lands in

between Hanzo’s legs!*

Bob: Well.. the groin area is being well documented by Fei tonight

Ralph: You’d do the same thing if you were in his situation!

Bob: True!

*Hanzo tries to block out the pain and wraps his legs around Fei to try and choke him out*

Ralph: Hanzo is taking a page out of Egypt’s book

*Fei struggles to get free but Hanzo’s got him locked! Fei kicks up  and rolls ontop of Hanzo. Hanzo let’s go of the

choke hold but Fei locks onto his legs and pulls down!*

1……..2……..3!!!!

Fei vs. Genjuro

*Genjuro jumps into the ring! Him and Hanzo start kicking the hell out of Fei!*

Ralph: Umm.. isn’t Hanzo suppose to leave?

Bob: Damn right!

*Hanzo picks up Fei, Genjuro gets a chair and smacks Fei right over the head with it!!! Fei falls flat out!!!! Hanzo

walks out of the ring and Genjuro smacks  Fei around just a little bit before putting his foot on him.*

Bob: Well, it’s over, atleast Fei got half way through them.. there’s no shame!

Ralph: HOLY SHIT!!!!!

Bob: What?!?!?!

*Tom Dyron jumps into the ring and smacks Genjuro right in the back of the head with that same chair!! Genjuro

doubles over then gets hit again on top of the head!!!*

Ralph: Where in the hell did he come from!?!?!?

*Tom Dyron points to Jubei who is still at the top of the ramp with the chair*

Tom: First your brother, next my blade of souls BITCH!

*Tom rolls Fei on top of Genjuro*

1……..2………3!!!!

*Tom leaves the ring side area as Fei and Genjuro are still laid out! Jubei makes his way down to the ring slowly

and slides in. He rolls Fei over.*

1….2…..3

Bob: it’s over! Fei just couldn’t last one more fight!

Ralph: that was one hell of a match!

*Jubei picks up Genjuro who is bleeding from the back of the head. He helps him to the back. Elly comes to Fei’s

aid.*

Winners: Shotori Samurai

Guyver vs. Devilman

Bob: and now.. it’s time to say goodbye to two of the greatest super stars that the uctf has ever seen!

Ralph: All of these old guys like Vegeta, Devilman, and Guyver are leaving the uctf… the guys who paved the way

for the younger talent here.

*Guyver walks down to the ring slowly, greeting the fans one last time before he has his last battle in the uctf!*

Ralph: Do you think Guyver can pull it off this time?

Bob: Well, 3 times was suppose to be a charm, but it wasn’t. The fourth time wasn’t either. Maybe.. just maybe

somehow Guyver can come out on top against tonight!

Ralph: Well, we’ll see right now because here he comes!

*Dark sounding music begins to play as a fire lights around the entrance way. Devilman walks from behind the

curtain with an evil look on his face.*

Devilman: You ready to get your ass beat for a fifth time?

Guyver: We’ll just see about that DevilBitch

Devilman: Gasp! Is that a profanity that just came out of your mouth?

Guyver: Yes it was.. and blood is about to come out of yours…

Devilman: I see.. well, what would you do if I did this?

*Devilman slaps the shit out of Guyver like a 2 cent bitch then tackles him to the ground!*

Bob: Just like I thought! No love lost between these men!

*Devilman throws Guyver around then shoots him in the back with his anntenae ray.  Guyver hits the ropes.

Devilman grabs him around the neck then picks him up over his head! Guyver shoots an energy beam that hits

Devilman in the neck! Devilman falls to one knee then gets soccer kicked in the ribs by Guyver! In attempt to get

away, Devilman staggers into the corner where Guyver stomps away!*

Ralph: These two are giving it their all in their final match!

*Devilman gets back to his feet and Guyver jumps towards the corner to crush his opponent. Devilman gets out of

the way and Guyver hits all Turnbuckle! Devilman connects with a standing side kick to the side of the head of

Guyver that knocks him over the Top Rope! Guver hits the apron and gets clotheslined hard by Devilman! Guyver

is still somehow on the apron and he stands back up! Devilman grabs him and gives him a suplex back into the

ring!*

Bob: Devilman on the attack! If he keeps this up, this match is over!

*Devilman gets up and starts mocking Guyver! He picks guyver up by the head, but gets punched in the chest,

Guyver then whips him into the corner face first! Devilman bounces back and shoots Guyver in the face with his

antenae blast, followed by a kick to the stomach!*

Ralph: What’s Devilman about to do?

Bob: I think he’s about to use the same move he used to defeat Vegeta on December 8th!

*Devilman picks him up and gives him a Jackknife Powerbomb!!! Then Hystalin starts walking down the aisle!

Devilman walks away from Guyver and up to the ropes*

Devilman: Hey bitch, what are you doing down her?

*Hystalin gets on the ropes and gets right in Devilman’s face!*

Hystalin: I just wanted to say,  happy retirement!

*Hystalin grabs his head and jumps off of the apron, causing Devilman’s neck to slingshot off of the ropes! He

stumbles back and Guyver wraps him up in the small package!*

1…2…..3!!!!

Bob: GUYVER WINS! GUYVER WINS!!! GUYVER WINS!!!

Ralph: Give the assist to Hystalin!!! She’s walking back to her locker rooms laughing her ass off!

Bob: Hystalin had that one planned?!

*The entire Order of the Black Flame comes in and starts beating Guyvers ass!! Devilman walks away pissed and

his crew follows behind him!*

Winner: Guyver

(Backstage)

Doctor: Mr. Saotome! I can’t allow you to go out there!

Saotome: Get out of my face… I’m fine

Doctor: It’s my duty to order to stay! I’ll have to wrap your eyes now!

*Jin grabs the doctor and throws him into the wall, then he makes his way through the backstage area, towards the arena*

(back in the arena)

Jin vs. Krauser

*”Blue Monday begins to play one more time and Jin Saotome comes walking out with bandages all over his face

from the last fight he had. The hardcore Jin fans stand to their feet and show the Enforcer of Badd Company some

love.*

Bob: I don’t see how he’s coming back out again after that injury sustained from Hystalin…

Ralph: Me neither.. let’s see how long he’ll last against Krauser, who hasn’t had a fight yet in the UCTF. Who’s

fresh… who has no injuries and one of the most powerful fighters on the planet.

Bob: Wow.. that was pretty good Ralph!

Ralph: Thanks! I’ve been working on that line for a week!

Bob: Well folks, if you don’t know how Krauser got the title, about a month ago, it was handed to him by

Devilman who just retired a few minutes ago!

Ralph: it has been said that Krauser doesn’t deserve the title that he has.. but we’ll see right now, because here he

comes!

*Krauser comes to the ring, bringing a cold chill behind him as the fans quiet down for the German Superstar. He

gets in the ring and stands face to face with Jin, who’s eyes are still glazed over a little. Jin steps back a little as the

bell rings. Krauser goes on the attack! He punches him right in his injuried chest! Jin spins around and lands on

the second rope. Krauser stands on his back, putting all of the pressure on his chest*

Bob: Just like Hystalin, Krauser is going right to that injuried chest!

*Krauser throws him into the ropes and catches him with a clothesline, but Jin rides his arm and spins around his

entire body, turning it into his Deep Impact! Krauser’s head and Jin’s back hit the ground with tremendous force

and they bounce off of the mat like it’s a trampoline!*

Ralph: Good move by Jin! He has great ring presence!

Bob: He’s still two hurt to follow through though, and Krauser is still recovering!

*Jin and Krauser get back to their feet, Krauser quickly gouges Jin in the eyes! He puts him in the front face lock

and drags him across the ropes face first to add even more injury! Jin stumbles around then falls face first into the

mat! Krauser starts kicking him around the ring…*

Bob: Krauser is just playing around with Jin now!

Ralph: I don’t think Jin can come back but Krauser better do the smart thing and pin him while he’s got him down

Bob: You got that right

*Krauser stands Jin up and starts giving him straight body shots in the corner without letting up, Jin almost falls

down but he throws him back in the corner and keeps going! Suddenly Jin punching back! Krauser staggers back

but keeps working on Jin. Jin grabs his head and starts fighting back! Krauser knees him in the stomach but throws

him in the corner again! Jin pushes him away with his feet and comes out with the Saotome Hurricane Punch!!

Krauser steps back and gets hit with the Gale Blast Leg Lariat!!!*

Bob: Jin still has a little bit of fight back in him!!

*Jin gets up and starts screaming at the fans.. the begin throwing their chairs in the ring! Jin picks up a chair and

waits. Krauser gets up and gets nailed! Jin draws back and attacks Krauser with the chair! he hits him about 13

times then drops it.. Krauser is bleeding profusely! Jin puts his head between his knees and looks at the crowd*

Ralph: Uh oh…. UH OH!!!

*Jin screams again, picks up him and gives him the Heaven to Hell Thunderfire Bomb!!!*

Bob: Order of the Black Flame is out!!

Ralph: Look! Badd Company is out!!

*Ryuji grabs Devilman by the back and throws him into the backstage area!*

Ralph: Ryuji!!!!

Bob: look at the brawl all over the place!

*Jin covers Krauser*

1…….2…….3!!!!!!!!

Bob: New Champion! We’ve got a new champion!!!!

*Jin just lays on the ground as the referee lays the belt on him. Jin has a small smile on his face and falls out of the

ring*

Ralph: Well he’s finally got some gold…

*Eiji grabs Jin and helps him leave the arena as Piccolo checks on a fallen Krauser*

Winner: Jin Saotome

Egypt vs Miko Mido

Bob: Our last fight of the night!

Ralph: This is the fight I wanted to see the most!! hehehe!

Bob: :| I hope I won’t have to leave again!

Ralph: These two women go waaaay back! remember that little incident they had a few months ago?

Bob: Oh yeah.. do I ever!

*Egypt makes her way down to the ring, She hops into the ring. Miko winks at her and blows a kiss. Egypt glares

at her heavily. *

Ralph: Here we go!!

*Egypt rams Miko into the turnbuckle. Miko grabs Egypt by the head, and smashes her head into her knee, She

flips Egypt across the ring. Egypt Jumps to her feet imediately. Miko does a leg sweep, and Egypt falls back down.

Miko drags her by the legs to the center of the ring. Egypt sits up and is able to get her leg free and side kicks Miko to the head. Egypt Jumps up, as Miko is climbing to the top ropes, she does a Moonsault and connect into Egypt!*

Bob: The world Champion is hot!

Ralph: Damn right! She’s taking the fight right to Egypt!

*Miko scrambles ontop of Egypt to pin her. The referee comes over, Egypt grabs Miko’s knuckles, and force her to do a hand stand atop of her, she rolls out of the way before the 3 count is made, Miko falls head first into the

mat.Egypt grabs her by the back of the head, and rushes her into the turnbuckle. Miko is sparwled on the turn

buckle. Egypts scratches down her back. Miko perks up and grabs on to the turnbuckle, She lets go as she falls into a back flip landing behind Egypt and does a round house kick to her neck Egypt falls into the ropes, and slumps to her knees. *

Bob: Wow! I am really amazed!!! Miko is showing Egypt what’s she’s got!

Ralph: I think even Egypt is suprised!

*Miko comes around her and grabs her hair and forces Egypt to look up. Egypt looks up and throws an upper cut

into her jaw. Miko goes backward into and over the ropes. Egypt jumps over the top rope with a drop kick to

Miko’s chest and She falls back into the Metal barriers. Egypt gets up and Throws Miko back into the ring. Egypt

her self rolls into the ring. Miko and Egypt size each other up. Egypt throws a left hook, and Miko blocks. Egypt

throws another left hook, but as Miko blocks Egypt follow up with a spin kick. Egypt does a back flip. Miko gets to

her feet and glares up at Egypt.*

Miko: You fucking Bitch!!

Egypt: So I have been told.

*Miko grips Egypt by the waist and body slams her. Egypt recovers quickly and is up again. she has Miko in a

head lock. She twists her around and gives her the ddt.Miko makes a crunching sound. Miko rolls to her feet, and

catches Morrigan with a High kick . Egypt stumbles back. Miko acting quickly, does a drop kick to her for head.

Egypt goes down hard. Miko goes to pin her. at the 2 count Egypt grabs a hold of the ropes!!!*

Ralph: Another close one By Miko!

Bob: Miko is starting to look frustrated!

*Miko pulls her up to her feet, and swings her into the rope. Egypt bounces off the ropes as miko swings her to the

other side. Egypt bounce off and hits Miko with the Clothesline. Egypt grips her up by the neck, and choke slams

her. Egypt Pins her with her whole body. Miko smiles, and Kisses Egypt on the lips. Egypt Jumps off startled right

before the 3 count. Miko Gets up slowly, and runs toward Egypt. Egypt falls into a handstand and catches Miko in

ther killer thigh lock! Miko knees go week, and she falls on them. *

Ralph: that’s it Bob!! It’s over!!!

Bob: Don’t count Miko Out just yet!!

*Miko Bites into Egypts thigh, and head butts her in the groin. Egypt falls out of the position. Miko, does a leg

drop to the back of Egypts neck. Miko rolls away quickly and starts to climb up to the third rope she begins to do a

belly flop. Egypt rolls out of the way. Miko lands hard on her stomach!*

Bob: Big mistake by miko!! That might be just enough!! All Egypt has to do is roll over!!

*Both of them lay still……..Miko suddenly pops up dragging Egypt with her. Both women breathing heavily…

*Egypt Kicks away from her. and runs to the opposite side of the ring. Miko goes over to retrieve her, but is

welcomed by Egypts elbow. Miko flinches violently. she Grabs Egypt and gives her the frankensteiner!*

Ralph: Good lord!!

*Miko gets her pinned. the Referee gets to the 2 count, Egypt kness Miko in the stomach, and rolls from beneath

her. Miko gets up tiredly. Egypt is behind her she wipes some blood from her lip. Egypt does her Yurchenko attack

and Miko lands on the back of her neck!! a gash forms on her head and bleeds slightly. Miko is out.. Egypt looks

as though she is out too. Egypt crawls slowly over to Miko and puts her hand on Mikos chest….*

1……..2…….3!!!!!!!!

Ralph: Unbelievable!

Bob: Another New Champion tonight on Friday Fury!!!!

Winner: Egypt

*Egypt and Miko are still knocked out cold!*

Bob: Hey Ralph.. Look who’s coming out!!!

Ralph: O_O Yakuu!!

*Yakuu comes out and starts attacking Egypt in the back! She picks Egypt up over her head and starts choking her

out!!!*

Ralph: Now look who’s coming out!!

Bob: *looks at the entrance way and sees Burter!!!*

*Burter zips down to the ring and grabs up Yakuu. She drops Egypt back down to the ground and turns around!

Burter just looks at her.. kicks her in the stomach then gives her the Burter Bomb!!!*

Ralph: Holy shit!!!

*Burter picks up Egypt and puts her over his shoulder! he takes the World Belt and steps out of the ring! Yakuu

and Miko both lay knocked out in the middle of the ring!*

Bob: Well, I guess that means that’s the end! We hope you’ve enjoyed the new and improved Friday Fury, For Ralph Gerrard, I’m Bobby Hinden! See you next week!!!

In Two Weeks

Continue

Continue

Bob: Me too.

Ralph: Here comes AX right now. Damn, those guys are good.

Bob: Look! There’s a cloud of smoke!

Ralph: Do you think Team Rocket planned this?

Bob: Possibly.

(the smoke begins to clear up)

Jessie: get ready for trouble

James: better make that double

Jessie: To protect the world from devistation..

James: To unite all peoples within our nation..

Jessie: To denounce the evils of truth and love!

James: To extend our reach to the stars above!

Jessie: Jessie!

James: James!

Jessie: Team Rocket! Blast off at the speed of light!

James: Surrender now or prepare to fight!

Meowth: Meowth! That’s right!

SB: Oh this is just pathetic… CRECSCENT MOON SLASH!!!!!

Bob: Whoa! Team Rocket really got pummeled by Sailor Bowser’s attack.

Ralph: Hey! What’s Midnight Rider doing now?

Midnight Rider: Eat smoke exhaust!

Ralph: Midnight Rider is using his motercycle to create a puff of exhaust on Team Rocket! Jessie & James passes out! It looks like AX wins again!

That was fast.

Winner: Adrenaline Express

BoB- All right everyone, this is the fight that I think you all have been waiting for.. It’s Guyver vs. Devilman 4!!!!!!

(Crowd explodes)

Ralph- This ought to be a great one Bob. You know, I really have to give both fighters a lot of credit for doing this. Like for Guyver, He has suffered three losses at the hands of Devilman, not only losses, but extremely painful ones. And to go in the ring against the Interplanetary Champion for the fourth time shows a tremendous amount of gonads if I can say that word. Now Devilman is another story, he has beaten Guyver three times in the past, but this is the first time that his title is on the line. I mean, if he loses here it could be all over for him, the lights, the hype, and the fame. But you never know, all I know is It takes some courage to fight a Guyver unit once, but four times? I guess I just got to hand it to him, he is one hell of a fighter.

BoB- Couldn’t have said it better myself Ralph, and speaking of that, here come our first fighter, and it is Guyverrrrrr!!!!

(Crowd cheers as Guyver walks down the isle and into the ring)

BoB- Now from the opposite side, his opponent the reigning Interplanetary Champion making his first title defense Devilmaaaaaan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Crowd cheers again as Devilman makes his typical flying entrance into the ring)

Ralph- And we are just moments away from the opening bell as these two fighters prepare to face off for the fourth time!….

(Ding)

BoB- And there’s the bell! Guyver wasting no time shoots a psonic blast out of his head at the Devilman. Devilman leaps aside, and now counters with a blast from his antennae. Guyver perries it with his arms and charges at Devilman! Devilman leaping at Guyver locks him up by grabbing the inside of his arms and trying to hold him back!

Ralph- but it is not much use as Guyver buckles Devilman’s arms and throws him into the turn buckle! Guyver makes a leaping kick at Devilman now but Devilman once again dodging, as Guyver shatters the turn buckle?

Devilman- Now I’ve got you…

Bob- Guyver has just regained his balance but Devilman lunges at Guyver, grabs him from behind and smashes him down onto the canvas head first! Devilman lets go and regains another hold on Guyver picking him up above his head, and quickly slamming on the cement floor outside of the ring! But Guyver gets up and extends his vibro-blades!

Guyver- Heh, these should do me a world of good.

Ralph- Devilman has now moved to the center of the ring and Guyver re-enters. Guyver sizing up Devilman… But Devilman lunges again! Guyver leaps up and slashes downward at Devilman but just misses! Devilman shoots a beam from his antenna at Guyver hitting him in the face! and Guyver is sent back! Guyver clutches his face plate which looks like it may be cracked!…

(Guyver puts his hands down)

BoB- It is! Guyver’s face plate is damaged by the lazer from Devilman! But Guyver is not quitting, he forms a blast of energy in his hands and hurls it at Devilman!!! Devilman tries to dodge but is grazed by the blast and sent towards where the shattered turn buckle is! Guyver charges Devilman and leaps on him and begins to punch him in the head!!

Ralph- This could be serious trouble for Devilman! He is thrashing his claws trying to ward of the Guyver unit but is doing minimal damage. Guyver has now severely bloodied the face of Devilman, and he now quits the pummeling and picks Devilman up! And he hurls Devilman into the corner! And charges at him once again!

BoB- But Devilman exits the ring before Guyver reaches him! Is he forfeiting?!

Ralph- Well Guyver now has his hands in the air in victory…

BoB- But wait! Devilman has leaped in the air towards Guyver and he comes down behind him thrusting four of his fingers into the forehead of Guyver!!! Devilman quickly leaps around to the front of Guyver and rips off part of the Guyver unit!!!

Ralph- Thank God he missed the control medal.

BoB- And now Devilman slashes at the face of Guyver slicing the skin!!!! Guyver falls to his knees clinching his bleeding face but is picked back up by Devilman and thrown into one of the existing corners! Devilman leaps at the wounded Guyver and kicks him in the neck snapping his head back, and he follows through with an elbow to the head!

Ralph- Guyver is taking some tremendous punishment here, but if Devilman goes too far, Guyver could snap and his unit take over, which would be catastrophic for Devilman. Who now has grabbed Guyver around the waste and thrown him to the ground!

BoB- I think that’s it Ralph! there is a little bit of movement coming from Guyver, but not a lot. And our official in charge examines him… and… it looks as though… Yep it’s over!

(Crowd cheers as the ref announces Devilman’s victory)

Ralph- And the winner and STILL Interplanetary champion of the world!!!! DEVILMAN!!!!!

(Crowd cheers)

BoB- Wow! What a magnificent effort by Guyver. Too bad it had to end the way it did. A great display by both fighters though, I must say.

Ralph- Guyver is now helped back to his feet, as the ring is mobbed by fans.

Winner- Devilman

Bob: Now for another re-match of the evening, New Wave Dave goes against Tatewaki Kuno, the Blue Thunder of Furikahn High.

Ralph: Who do you think will win.

Bob: I think New Wave Dave will win this one. He’s a blue mage, ya know.

Ralph: Probably, well… let’s see.

(DING!)

NWD: Now I’m going to rock you like a hurricane Kuno!

Kuno: Hold you tongue punk! No one speaks to the Blue Thunder!

Bob: Tatewaki Kuno lunges at NWD with his bokken. He misses! NWD is punching the shit out of him! Oh, This is just good.

Ralph: I’m sure NWD will finally have the revenge he wanted to badly. Remember his second re-match?

Bob: Yeah. A missed 80′s Explosion and Dave lost it. Kuno: I shall smite thee and win the love of the pig tailed girl!

NWD: Oh shut up! Look who is in the audience! It’s Hystalin.

Hystalin: Dave, do you want me to hit you with an Ice2 spell?

NWD: If you can follow it with a Cure2 spell, be my guest!

Bob: Hystalin throws an Ice2 spell at NWD and it hits! Now she’s hitting NWD with a Cure2 spell as well. Why is she doing this?

Ralph: Isn’t it obvious?

NWD: Ice2!!!!!!!

Ralph: NWD just hit Tatewaki Kuno with an Ice2 spell! He’s frozen solid!

Bob: Now NWD is pushing the frozen blue thunder off the ring… and Tatewaki Kuno is counted out! New Wave Dave wins!

Ralph: I bet NWD is happy with this victory.

Bob: First a draw, then a loss, now a win. Congratulations NWD! You deserve it!

Winner: New Wave Dave

BoB- All right, it’s time for Fire N’ Ice vs. For Love and Justice.

Ralph- That’s right, and here comes For Love and Justice now.

(Sailor Moon and Tuxedo Mask enter)

BoB- And here comes Fire N’ Ice now!

(FAI enter and Ice man gets in the ring)

BoB- Ice man enters the ring and is immediately rushed by both members of For Love and Justice! Sialor Moon Blasts Ice man into the corner with a burst of energy, and Tuxedo Mask hits him with a jump kick!

Ralph- But here comes Fireball!!!! Fireball enters the ring and grabs Sailor Moon around the waist and throws her back!

Ice man- All right, if that’s how you want to play it… Fire N’ Ice Final attack…

Fireball- BURNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ice man- WINTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BoB- Fireball, and Ice man hit both Sailor Moon and Tuxedo mask with the burning winter and destroy the ring throwing both of them out of it unconcious, and into the crowd!!!

Ralph- Holy cow!!! It’s over!! Fire N’ Ice make short work of For Loce and Justice.

Winner- Fire N’ Ice

Bob: Here comes a fight that everyone is looking forward to.

President Bill Clinton is going against Kenneth Star.

Ralph: There has been a lot of animocity between these two.

Bob: How come?

Ralph: Two words… Monica Lewinsky.

Bob: Yeah… she’s a slut.

(DING!)

Bob: The President & Kenneth star are sizing each other and… what’s this?

Ralph: What is LIna Inverse & Hystalin doing in the ring?

Lina: To all hentais out there…

Hystalin: Listen closely!

Bob: Lina has burned Kenneth Star to a pile of cinders and ash with a fireball!

Lina: Trying to be the next Larry Flynt? Bah! (spits in the ashes.)

Hystalin: And now Billy.. it’s your turn to die!

Bill: Hiya hon. Why don’t I just show you around the White House? I’m sure you’ll love the Presidential Suite.

Hystalin: Oh, you’re just plain sick!

Bill: But Hyst, I just wanna show you some luvin’

(slaps Bill in the face)

Bill: Ooohh… Kinky! Spank me! I’ve been really naughty.

Hystalin: You’re damn right you’ve been naughty!

Bob: Hystalin drops Bill Clinton in a pile driver! What style.

Ralph: Hystalin rises to the air.

Hystalin: This is for Paula Jones!!!

Bob: She just did a knee drop on the President’s back! That’s gotta hurt!

Hystalin: This is for Jennifer Flowers!!!

Bob: She did it again! The president must be really hurting right now!

Hystalin: This is for Monica Lewinsky!!!

Bob: Again she pummels on Bill Clinton!

Bill: I… I… I cannot feel my legs.

Hystalin: This is for Hillary & Chelsea Clinton!!!

Bob: She body slams on the President! I don’t think he’s conscious.

Hystalin: Here me Odin, guardian of Valhalla, answer my summons and come forth… NOW!!!!!

(Odin appears.)

Odin: Hi Hyst, what’s up?

Hystalin: Odin, KILL THAT PERVERT!

Odin: President Bill Clinton?

Hystalin: You got that right!

Odin: Okay!

Ralph: Oh my god! Odin just cut President Clinton into many pieces!

Hystalin: See you in hell pervert!

Shayla Shayla: Hyst, you did good.

Hystalin: Thanks Shayla.

Bob: The two girls shakes hands. It’s over! President Clinton & Kenneth Star are dead. The US has been avenged!

Ralph: Good work Shayla Shayla & Hystalin!

Winner: Who Cares

Bob: We have a fight that has been brewing for some time, Ryu, the street fighter, will be fighting against the infamous Victoro.

Ralph: Victoro has alreay have a reputation of being a dirty, back-handed son-of-a-bitch, but do you know why? Here’s a replay.

(replay begins)

As you can see, While Hystalin & Ryu were in their long-awaited fight, Victoro intefered by use his mock moonlight technique on her and turned into a giant were-monkey.

(replay ends)

Bob: It looks like Ryu is psyching himself up for this fight.

Ralph: I’ll say, he needs a victory like this, after losing to Hystalin.

Bob: But it was not his fault.

Ralph: Perhaps, but he lost anyways.

Bob: Do you see Victoro?

Ralph: Hmm… no where in sight.. isn’t that him?

Bob: Victoro has come to the ring, I didn’t even see that.

Ralph: The crowd is booing and hissing at Victoro. No big surprise.

Victoro: Oh, shut up! (casts magic spell)

Bob: What the… Victoro just finished off several of the spectators in the ring with a magic spell! As soon as this fight is over, we’re calling the police.

Ralph: The two are in the ring…

Bob: Who’s that in the audience?

Ralph: I think it’s the Guyver. It appears he’s watching the fight closely.

Bob: I wonder why?

Guyver: Washu, Victoro’s here. Launch, Operation: Carbunkle

(DING!)

Bob: The fight begins.

Ralph: The two are sizing each other up now.

Ryu: You think you come here, cause hell, interfere with my fight, and get away with it?

Victoro: Little boy, I can do whatever I want! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!!

Bob: Ryu punches Victoro in the face.

Victoro: Owww! That hurts!

Ralph: Victoro shoots a fire spell on Ryu, but the shot does not connect.

Bob: Victoro looks rather pissed off.

Ralph: I’ll say.

Victoro: Take this pretty boy!

Bob: Victoro shoots out a strong lightning spell. It hits Ryu, but it looks like it has done nothing to him.

Ryu: Striking a street fighter with lightning? You will face the full power student of Shen Long!

Ralph: Ryu attacks Victoro with a hurricane kick, but Victoro blocks the attack easily.

Meanwhile…

Washu: Najaro, Beowulf, Shayla… Victoro is busy fighting Ryu, so you guys better be quick. If he comes back, who knows what he’ll do to Carbunkle.

Najaro: Ta bien.

Beowulf & Shayla Shayla: What did he say?

Washu: He said “okay.”

Beowulf & Shayla Shayla: Okay.

Washu: Good.

(pushes a button)

Washu: Good luck you three.

(Najaro, Beowulf & Shayla Shayla leaves Washu’s lab and into Victoro’s stronghold with the Carbunkle dupe.)

Washu: Yes! I am the greatest scientific genius in the universe! HAHAHAHAHAHaHAHA!!!!!!!!

In the fight…

Ralph: Victoro is going strong on Ryu. I’m surprised.

Bob: Yeah. Ryu is taking on some damage, but he’s like the Energizer bunny… just keep going and going and going…

Ralph: Never talk about the Energizer bunny around me.

Bob: Ralph, I’m not going to argue with you.

Ralph: Good.

Ryu: This for your inteference… HADOKEN!!!

Bob: Ryu just threw a fireball at Victoro, but Victoro has put up a crystal shield to reflect it, and it goes back to Ryu!

Victoro: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! You have to do better than that to beat me! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ryu: Shut up… SHORYUKEN!!!!

Ralph: Ryu attacks Victoro with a Shoryuken, but Victoro counters with… what’s that?

Ryu: What did you hit me with?

Victoro: With this… (unsheathes weapon) It’s the Crystal Sword of Tenku! With this, I shall paint the canvas with your blood! HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

Bob: The Crystal Sword of Tenku?!?!

Ralph: Is that legal in the UCTF?

Bob: I don’t know.. I’ll have to check on that.

Meanwhile…

Najaro: Okay, we’re in. Be sure to watch of traps.

Shayla Shayla: How come you know so much about this guy Najaro?

Najaro: I’ve dealt with Victoro before.

Beowulf: He has a point there.

Najaro: Follow me.

(Najaro, Beowulf & Shayla Shayla run down a long hallway.)

Back to the fight…

Bob: Now Victoro is receiving most of the damage! He sure got hammered by Ryu’s Red Hadoken.

Ralph: You can say that again!

Bob: He sure got hammered by…

Ralph: Oh, shut up!

Victoro: I will end you street fighter!

Ryu: Give it your best shot!

Bob: Victoro rushes to Ryu and throws slashes with his sword. He missed!

Ralph: That’s gonna cost him some.

Bob: What’s this? Victoro slashed the turnbuckle and he’s having trouble withdrawing his sword. This does not bode well for Victoro.

Ralph: But it boes well for the street fighter.

Ryu: What were you saying, about ending me?

Victoro: Oh, why don’t you shut up and die like a good loser!

Bob: This must be the longest fight I’ve ever seen since Mourl fought Shayla Shayla.

Ralph: At least it is not as boring. When Mourl fought Shayla

Shayla, for 50 minutes they did nothing. THAT was boring!

Bob: I agree with you on that one.

Victoro: The end is near.

Ryu: Right… YOUR end is near!

Ralph: What is that Victoro is doing?

Bob: It’s called the Demon’s Blaze. It’s one of the strongest black magic spells in Angelus.

Ralph: How the hell did you know that?

Bob: I vacationed in Angelus for two weeks a few years ago.

Meanwhile…

Shayla Shayla: I’m surprised that no one has come and attacked us.

Najaro: Me too. This is not like Victoro to leave his stronghold without any defences.

Beowulf: Anways, we still have to save Carbunkle.. for Hystalin.

(the group of three run to an empty room with Carbunkle tied up in chains.)

Najaro: I think we made it.

Shayla Shayla: Isn’t that Carbunkle?

Beowulf: I recognize that ruby anywhere.

(Carbunkle wakes up.)

Carbunkle: Najaro! Beowulf! Shayla Shayla! You’ve come to save me!

(while undoing Carbunkle’s chains.)

Shayla Shayla: Your friend sent us here.

Carbunkle: Why didn’t Hystalin show up herself?

Beowulf: Victoro was watching her every move. If she did come to save you, he would definately know.

Carbunkle: Listen, you three have to be careful.

Beowulf: Why is that?

Carbunkle: Victoro left someone to keep me under lock and key while he’s away.

Shayla Shayla: Oh? Who?

(Just then, the room is filled with grandiose maniacal laughter… worse than Naga, Jinnai, Kefka & Kodachi’s laugh put together!)

Mumm-Ra: Wherever evil exist… MUMM-RA LIVES!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Shayla Shayla: And I thought Jinnai’s laugh was annoying! This guy’s laugh is worse!

Najaro: I heard of this guy. He is no pushover!

Mumm-Ra: The three of you can burn forever in the darkest and blackest hell! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

(Shoots his red lightning at the three)

Back to the match…

Ralph: Holy shit! I don’t know how long those two can handle this! They’re both bleeding pretty badly, and beaten up quite a bit!

Bob: All this time, I thought Victoro was a bag of hot air. Now I see that he can easily put his words into action.

Victoro: You got that right!

Ryu: Shoryuken!

Victoro: Ahhhhhhh!!!!!

Ralph: Ryu just pegged Victoro with a his Shoryuken!

Bob: Victoro goes down!

Ralph: The count begins.

1… 2…

Ralph: I don’t think he’s getting up.

3… 4…

Bob: I wouldn’t be surprised. With all the punishment he received from Ryu, I would be completely surprised if he did.

6… 7…

Victoro: I… am… not through… yet…

Ryu: You will be. Your evil will be your undoing.

Victoro: Stop the… physicological shit… we have… a fight to finish.

Ryu: Whatever you want Victoro.

Bob: I cannot believe it! Victoro got up!

Ralph: This guys has the greatest stamina I’ve ever seen since the Spawn/Devilman fight.

Bob: Call me crazy, but I think the reason why that fight was so good was because the other fights before it sucked donkey balls.

Ralph: Think whatever you want Crazy.

Bob: Shut up… Victoro jumps into the air…

Victoro: Now feel the wrath of the Dark Blizzard! HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!

Ralph: Victoro has pulled the Dark Blizzard technique. Thousands of shards of black ice is raining down on Ryu. Ryu is not doing so well on it at all.

Bob: Nope.. it sure does not.

Victoro: I told you I will end you!

Ryu: I am not out yet.

Ralph: Someone end this! I’m so fucking bored!

Bob: Shut your ass Ralph! This fight is cool!

Ralph: Bob… (holds Bob by the collar) Never mention the word “ass” in my presence ever again.

Bob: Hey, it’s not my fault you got a spatula shoved up your ass!

(Ifurita appears.)

Ifurita: Will you two subhumans stop your quarrelling and continue commenting on the fight?

Ralph: Oh… uh… okay.

Bob: Thank you Ifurita.

Ifurita: No problem. hehehe

(Ifurita disappears.)

Bob: Okay, it appears Victoro is down this time.

Ralph: the count begins.

1… 2…

Bob: He’s not moving.

Ralph: Is he dead?

4… 5…

Ralph: He’s getting up again!

Bob: Well I’ll be damned!

Victoro: Feel the powers of the Satan’s Hellfire!

Ralph: Satan’s Hellfire?

Bob: What the hell is that?

Ralph: I believe we shall soon see…

Meanwhile…

(Mumm-Ra kicked the shit out of Najaro, Beowulf & Shayla Shayla. Only Shayla Shayla has the energy left to fight.)

Mumm-Ra: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! Now it is only you left for me to beat fire woman!

Shayla Shayla: No one calls me that… FIREBALL!!!!!!

(Shayla Shayla throws a fireball at Mumm-Ra!)

Mumm-Ra: AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! FIRE!!!!!!!

Shayla Shayla: I knew the undead like you are prone to fire attack. The bodies of the dead are prone to fire attacks, for the flesh rots quickly.

Mumm-Ra: Shut up and die bitch!

Shayla Shayla: NO ONE CALLS ME A BITCH!!!!!!!

Mumm-Ra’s red lightning & Shayla Shayla’s fire stream collides with each other, each attack not budging the other.)

Back to the fight…

Bob: Well, the fight has been going for about an hour, and Victoro will not call it quits. This has to be the most amazing fight I have ever seen… period.

Ralph: Well, who else can say that… question mark.. new paragraph…

Bob: What the hell are you talking about?

Ralph: Good question… I’ll let you know when I have a good answer.

Bob: Ryu is recovering quite better than expect… seeing he has survived Victoro’s Satan’s Hellfire.

Ralph: I don’t think that will be shown again.

Bob: And I thought Doom was scary…

Victoro: Why do I suspect you are prolonging this intentionally?

Ryu: I am not… you seem to be on as much equal terms than me.

Bob: What’s Ryu doing…

Ryu: SHIN SHIN SHIN SHIN SHORYUKEN!!!

Ralph: Ryu has done the new new new new shoryuken on Victoro.. the same attack he did on Shampoo after she did the “chestnuts roasting on an open fire” attack.

Meanwhile…

Shayla Shayla: I have been holding back bonehead.

Mumm-Ra: Oh? How is that so?

Shayla Shayla: Like this… MEGAFLARE!!!!!!!

(Shayla Shayla uses the Megaflare attack on Mumm-Ra. It cancels out Mumm-Ra’s red lightning. Mumm-Ra screams in pain as he is burned to ashes.)

Shayla Shayla: Well, that’s all done. Najaro, Beowulf…

(Najaro & Beowulf slowly wakes up.)

Najaro: Damn, that guy WAS tough!

Beowulf: I’ll need a box of aspirins for my headache.

Shayla Shayla: Well… that worthless bag of bones is reduced to ashes. Let’s go boys.

Carbunkle: Oh Shayla…

(Carbunkle jumps on Shayla Shayla’s shoulders.)

Carbunkle: Oh, thank you so much for freeing me! I am so eternally thankful.

Shayla Shayla: Oh… you’re welcome. Now we’ll be taking you home. Hystalin has been worried sick.

(A hologram of Washu appears to the group.)

Washu: Well, I see you did well against Mumm-Ra. While you three were getting your asses kicked, I tried to figure out his weakness, but it seems you figured it out already. Now, I’ll bring you back to the UCTF.

(Washu teleports Shayla Shayla, Najaro, Beowulf & Carbunkle back to the UCTF complex.)

Back to the fight…

Ryu: I think Carbunkle should be free by now.

Victoro: What did you say street fighter?

Bob: Ryu attacks Victoro with a barrage of fireballs! Victoro is really getting pummeled now. How much more can he take?

(Just then, Shayla Shayla, Najaro, Beowulf & Carbunkle appears to the arena.)

Hystalin: CARBUNKLE!!!!

Carbunkle: HYSTALIN!!!!!! (Hystalin & Carbunkle runs to each other and embrace in a big hug.)

Hystalin: I thought I would never see you again! (tears of joy)

Carbunkle: I thought I would die! I’m so happy.

Hystalin: Me too. I hope we never have to go through this again!

Bob: Wow (sniff), that is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.

Ralph: I agree.

Ryu: It is over.

Victoro: What the hell… CARBUNKLE?!?!?

Najaro: So Victoro, we meet again.

Beowulf: You coward, how dare you hold a hostage!

Shayla Shayla: You’ll pay for your cowardice!

Victoro: Oh please, somebody stop the bleeding!

(Victoro easily knocked out Najaro, Beowulf & Shayla Shayla cold. He also uses his magic to restrain Ryu to one of the turnbuckles.)

Victoro: You should have stayed where you were Carbunkle! You would have lived longer in chains.

Carbunkle: I have never felt such misery since my death to Felix’s claws!

Ralph: What’s this… I can’t see!

Bob: Me too… I think it’s the Ruby Light!

Victoro: AAHHHHHH!!!!! My Eyes!!!!!!!!!!

Carbunkle: RYU! Behind you!

(Ryu’s restrains fade away and releases the Crystal Sword of Tenku from its resting place.)

Ryu: And now Victoro… YOU DIE!!!!!

Victoro: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Ralph: Oh my god! Ryu got the Crystal Sword of Tenku and impaled Victoro with it! It looks like the end for him!

Bob: No one could survive that!

Victoro: I.. will… return…!!! AAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Victoro vanishes!)

Bob: It’s over! It’s over! Ryu wins the fight!

Ryu: Carbunkle?

Carbunkle: Yes?

Ryu: Thank you for helping me.

Carbunkle: No problem! Hehe!

(Ryu & Carbunkle shakes hands… or is it hands and paw?)

Hystalin: Beowulf, Najaro, Shayla Shayla, Guyver… Thank you so much for helping me. If it wasn’t for you, I would have never have Carbunkle with me again. Thank you ever so much.

(Washu appears.)

Washu: What am I… chopped liver?

(Washu drops a 1 ton statue on Hystalin, but she dodges easily.)

Hystalin: Of course, thank you most of all Washu.

Washu: Anything. Now we have the Spear of White to worry about.

Hystalin: Yes. I need that item so much.

Washu: See you later!

(Washu disappears.)

Bob: Well, that was one hell of a fight!

Ralph: I’ll say.. the longest ever!

Bob: I think we have seen the last of Victoro, don’t you think?

Ralph: I hope so…

Winner: Ryu

Ralph – It’s time for one of our tag team fights tonight — Fire N’ Ice versus ELMO.
BoB – It’s sort of strange that an untried team like ELMO should debut against the veteran and undefeated Fire N’ Ice, isn’t it?

Ralph – Indeed it is, BoB, but practically everything about ELMO is strange, if you ask me.

BoB – I can’t dispute that. It will be interesting to see how they fight.

Ralph – That’s right. For anyone who hasn’t been keeping up with the recent UCTF rookies: El and Mo are both big globs of gunk.

BoB – Yeah. They’re jello, or gelatin, or jelly, or something. It’s hard to say. Especially since no one seems to have seen them aside from their weird home videos.

Ralph – Here come Fireball and Ice man now! And the crowd loves it!

BoB – They are getting some serious fan support!

Ralph – Fireball takes his place in the ring. And that must be ELMO entering now.

BoB – El and Mo have formed legs in their masses and are walking to the ring in single file. It’s kind of funny looking — big balls of glop on top of pairs of legs.

Ralph – Listen to that, BoB! ELMO is getting some fan support too!

BoB – It’s true. The reaction doesn’t seem to be what Fire N’ Ice got, but you have to listen closely to tell!

Ralph – The grey blob, Mo, climbs into the ring. His legs immediately give way, and now is just sort of sitting there as a formless shape.

BoB – Can it fight? Because we know Fireball can… we’re gonna start any time now.

(Ding!)

Ralph – Here we go! Mo drops and begins to spread across the floor, nearing Fireball. Fireball steps… uh… into the midst of it. He stomps upon the jello, but it just shifts around his foot!

BoB – And Mo grows again about Fireball. He squirms and climbs up Fireball’s legs! Fireball is trying to shake it off, but it isn’t working well! I don’t think he knows how to deal with it! But is Mo really doing any damage?

Ralph – Mo is climbing higher and higher up Fireball. Most of him must be off the floor now, and he starts to wrap around Fireball’s neck! This doesn’t look good at all!

BoB – A trio of ice spheres, one after another, slam into the blob, coming from the sidelines. Ice man is doing all he can to help! He’s lucky he didn’t hit his partner, though. It seemed to hurt Mo, who slides down onto the canvas again.

Ralph – Mo slithers to his corner, where he is replaced by ELMO’s other member, El, the green gel.

BoB – The green blob replaces the grey one. It shoots a long string of gel across the ring and wraps it about the turnbuckle. El launches himself towards the turnbuckle, slamming into Fireball along the way! And Fireball is trapped in a sticky mass of glop! Yuck!

Ralph – It’s a sticky situation, all right. Fireball is having some serious trouble getting his limbs to move right. He utilizes a fire attack! And that scorched off much of El! The proximity of the blast, however, wasn’t good for Fireball. Fireball falls to his knees, but sends another scorching blast after El, which incinerates a good portion of his body… or whatever.

BoB – El is quiet and on the floor, which must be the equivalent of unconscious for him. Mo pulls him from the ring and enters again… but on the other side, Fireball is in no shape to fight, either. Ice man replaces him for FAI.

Ralph – Ice man attacks again with his ice projectiles, but Mo is prepared and slides aside. The two draw together to battle in the center of the ring.

BoB – Ice man smacks Mo with a roundhouse kick… but Mo seems to grab his foot. Mo twists and twirls Ice man by the foot, right with him! Ice man pries himself free and moves to his corner.

Ice man – How the hell do we beat these things? Kicks and punches aren’t doing a damn bit of good!

Fireball – Unh… the elemental attacks have some effect…

Ice man – You know what this means, don’t you? Wake up and gimme all the effort you’ve got, Fireball!

Ralph – Fireball outside the ring pulls himself up slowly by the ropes. Back inside, Mo slams against Ice man, knocking him into the turnbuckle! Ice man leaps into the air, and…

Fireball – Prepare for the Fire N’ Ice Final Attack!

Ice man – BURNING WINTER!!

BoB – Ice man releases a huge spiked ball of ice at Mo! Fireball adds his respective element, increasing the speed of the ice and setting it on fire! The ball smashes into — and right through Mo!

Ralph – Egad! There’s a big hole in him!

BoB – Mo slumps to the ground, as does Fireball… but Ice man is still standing in the ring! Mo is staying down…

Ralph – Still down…

BoB – And the count is finished! Fire N’ Ice remain undefeated by winning tonight against ELMO!

Ralph – But you gotta admit, BoB, ELMO put out a surprising fight on their part against the most capable tag team in the UCTF!

BoB – That was certainly something, Ralph. Let’s see if things get even better as the night progresses….

Winners: Fire N’ Ice

BoB – One of the many treats we have in store for us tonight is the debut match of Che, who will be facing off against Akira. How do you see this one going, Ralph?
Ralph – That’s difficult to say, BoB. We don’t really know what this Che can do.

BoB – It looks like we’ll find out soon enough. Che is already in the ring with not one, but two elaborate swords. Akira is approaching, meanwhile, and he isn’t on his motorcycle.

Ralph – Thank the bananaman for that!

BoB – The who?

Ralph – The bananaman, man!

BoB – Yeah. Sure.

Ralph – Akira steps into the ring. We’re ready to begin!

(Ding!)

BoB – Che wastes no time rushing toward Akira and lashing out with a high kick! Akira dodges and draws back in a defensive mode!

Che – GENKI DAMA!!

Ralph – Che releases a sphere of energy at Akira, sending Akira sprawling! Che draws closer, but Akira is on his feet quickly. Akira ducks a sword slash from Che and leaps foreward, tackling him! Che hits the ground hard and one of his blades is sent scattering along the ring floor!

BoB – Che takes a tough punch from Akira, and… #$%@! Look at that, Ralph! Something is happening to Che!

Ralph – Che throws Akira and rises from the floor! His eyes begin to glow and his shirt is torn from his body. Che looks mad!

BoB – I think it’s something more than mad, Ralph. A series of white wings sprout from his back and… uh oh, Akira doesn’t look so good!

Ralph – I don’t think he knew what he was getting into, BoB.

BoB – Che floats just above the ring towards his opponent. Akira dodges a swipe but falls right into Che’s foot! Che drops to the floor and retrieves his second blade. Akira catches Che in the side with a blow, but he’s not in a strong enough condition for it to do much damage! Che throws Akira across the ring, where he rebounds off the far ropes.

Ralph – Upon Returning, he takes a serious smack from the pommel of Che’s Murasamane! Akira hits the floor, but Che isn’t done! Che slams a clenched fist against the ground! Sparks of energy flow from the floor and smack into Akira, who looks to be out cold!

BoB – What does Che think he’s doing? He continues to kick Akira while he’s down! And the ref is trying to wave him off…

Ralph – Che seems to finally be regaining his senses… he draws back. And the referee begins the count.

…4…5..6…

BoB – Che is holding his head… that’s strange, Ralph. Akira didn’t hit him in the head.

Ralph – Well BoB, I don’t know if Che is a normal human.

…9…10!!

BoB – And that’ll do it, folks! Che takes out Akira in his debut, and deals a little extra!

Ralph – It will be interesting to see where this guy goes in the UCTF, BoB. In any case, they’re dragging Akira from the ring, and it looks like it’s time to move on to our next fight.

Winner: Che

Ralph: This fight was supposed to be up Thanksgiving Day, but due to a technical glitch, it was was postponed until tonight.

BoB: Here comes Ryu now! Man, is he hyped tonight.

Ralph: I’ll say, he’s ready to kick some major ass tonight.

BoB: Do you see Hystalin around here?

Ralph: Look, she’s right over there. She’s coming to the the ring. I heard that in a freak accident, she was transformed into a giant were-monkey and caused massive damage.

BoB: And now, the two come to the center of the ring and shake hands. (DING!)

Ryu: I’ve been waiting a long time for this.

Hystalin: As have I been. I’ll have revenge for what you did to me in the rumbles!

Ralph: Ryu throws a fireball at Hystalin, but she easily blocks it.

Hystalin: That was too weak… FIRE3!!!

BoB: Hystalin throws a Fire3 spell at Ryu, but Ryu easily dodges it easily.

Ryu: You’ve seen to have grown stronger since your interference in my fight with your tag team partner Naga.

Hystalin: I think it has to do with the tail.

Ryu: Oh yeah, I’m sorry that happened.

Hystalin: Thank you, now we continue the fight!

Ralph: Hystalin jumps in the air and throws an Aero2 spell on Ryu. Ryu is standing firm.

BoB: I’m surprised by this. It’s getting really windy in here.

Ralph: I’ll say. (The winds pick up some of the spectators in the ring… one of which is Ukyo.)

Ralph: U-CHAN MY LOVE! YOU’VE COME TO ME!

Ukyo: How many times do I have to tell you? Stop calling me that, or I’ll shove a spatula up your ass!

BoB: HAHAHAHA!!!!! (The winds pick up Ukyo and blows her all over the ring.)

Ralph: Bye U-Chan!

BoB: Oh God!

Ralph: Look down there! Hystalin is still going strong on Ryu.

BoB: I’ll say.

Ralph: What is she doing?

BoB: Hystalin is not moving. What is that shining on her?

Ralph: Look up there! Someone is shining that weird light on her.

Victoro: HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Now the UCTF will fear the wrath of Victoro! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Ralph: Isn’t that the mock moonlight spell he did a few days ago.

BoB: I think so, and look! Hystalin is slowly transfroming in a giant were-monkey!

Ralph: This does not bode well!

Hystalin: Not again!

Victoro: Don’t ever fuck with me Black Paladin!

Hystalin: Victoro!

Victoro: I told you that you will never have a moment’s rest of normalcy without my say so, and I’m proving it now! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

BoB: Hystalin turned around, knocking Ryu off the ring.. and he’s out cold! Now it’s a fight between Hystalin and Victoro!

Hystalin: You will pay for that lunacy bit you did on me!

Victoro: Will you take my Visa or my Mastercard?

Ralph: Hystalin is running towards Victoro, and bellowed out an energy blast from her mouth! It only grazed Victoro!

BoB: Now Victoro is chanting some sort and dark magic spell on Hystalin, and survives unscathed by the assult!

Ralph: What is he doing now?

BoB: He’s running away, and turned off his mock moonlight attack. Hystalin is slowly turning back to normal…. but she’s naked!

Ralph: This is not for young eyes to see.

BoB: Wait, what’s going on now?

Ralph: JESUS CHRIST! It’s Happosai, and he’s trying to cop a feel.

BoB: That is disgusting!

Beowulf Get away from her you old fart! Happosai: Back off wolf-boy! I’m trying to have some fun!

BoB: Beowulf grabbed Happosai and threw him across the ring. Surprisingly, he lands safely on his bag of women’s undergarments.

Ralph: Hystalin is still in the ring, although she’s naked. It looks like Hystalin is the winner.

BoB: Someone dress up that girl!

Winner: Hystalin

ralph- her ecomes th ebell

DING

BoB=The two size each other up as spawn launches two chains at gabriel.. he manges to block one with the sword but the other ctaches around his leg.. he merely bends over and gives it ahearty yank sending spawn to his back.. he then leaps or uhh flies into the air and attemts to divebomb spawn with his sword

ralph- but spawn moves out of the way just in time.. gabriel looks a little hur or sutnned as spawn attmepts a backbreaker.. but gabriel grabs spanwn’s neck on the way down and flips him over…

BoB- gabriel take shis sowrd.. he’s ready to finish him off now.. but ait here comes beowulf…

ralph- he’s pulled gabriel away from spawn.. but sapwn is out cold already…

Winner- Gabriel

Guyver/devilman v. team rocket
BoB- here coem the unlikly combo of guyver and Devilman.. it seems devilman has a pokeball with his as does guyver.. and here comes team rocket!!

Jessie: get ready for trouble

James: better make that double

Jessie: To protect the world from devistation..

James: To unite all peoples within our nation..

Jessie: To denounce the evils of truth and love!

James: To extend our reach to the stars above!

Jessie: Jessie!

James: James!

Jessie: Team Rocket! Blast off at the speed of light!

James: Surrender now or prepare to fight!

Meowth: Meowth! That’s right!

BoB- here comes good ole mr bell

Guyver- WIAT! I have a proposition.. to make this fair I challenge you to a two on two pokemon fight.. jessiea nd jame seach get one and devilamn and I each get one.. we fight untill one side is gone

James: yes let’s do it

Jessie: you probably would have murdered us the other way

James: I choose.. Ratata

Jessie I choose… Vulpix!!

Devilman- I will be using Charmander

Guyver- PIKACHU! I choose you!!

Jessie- he’s using pikachu?

James how rare and exquisite we must have it… here’s something if we win we get your two pokemon.. if you win.. you get ours deal?

Guyver- deal

DING

James: Ratata.. TACKLE ATTACK!!

Guver Pikachu!Thunderwave!

BoB: and pikachu’s thunderwave attack knocke dback james’s Ratata…

Devilman: charmander.. Flamethorwer

Jessie- VULPIX.. flamethorwe

BoB- the trwo seemed to cancel eahc othe rout..

Voice- THERE YOU ARE!!

ralph- oh my it’s.. the lovely miss sarah chan.. hello sarah.

Sarah hi ralph. What are they doing with my pokemon?

BoB- your pokemon? Sarah- yeah.. I was training my vulpix this morning when these two rhymers stole him.. they also got my ratata.. and I almost had him evolved nito a raticade too (snif sniff)

Guyver- you mean you two have been bettnig with sarah-chan’s pokemon?

james- you don’t think we’d put our oWN on the lien would you. Sarahchan- VULPIX,FIRESPIN!!! Ratata SUPERFanG!!!

BoB- ohh it looks like vulpix and Ratata have turned on jessie and james.. they’re fleeing the arena…

Meowth- hey wait for meeeeeeeowth!!! Guyver- I guess that’s a win.

Pickachu -pika pikaCHU!!!

Devilamn- hehe yeah I guess so

guyver- you can keep that charmander by the way.. I have naother

Devilman- oh uhh thanks

Charmnader- cahr..charmander (looksloovingly at devilman)

ralph- ahh isn’t that cute?

Asusa- CUTE WHERE

BoB- security!!! )Security comes and takes azusa off

Azusa oh what a cute badge.. gimme my little enrique

Winner: Devilman and Guyver

ralph- please do.. (the big screen tv on the jumbotron shows what happened when happosai removed all o flina’s cliothing with a voodoo doll

Lina- you can turn that off now!!

BoB- sorry.. heyhere comes happosai.. he’s entering, as usual down throgh the crowd, flipping up skirts and the such…

happosai- what a haul I just raided the girls lockerroom here.. let me tell you that hystalin’s got a nice set of

Lina shut your trap.. and face me… LINA INVERSE

Happosai- of course.. but I won’t like it.. yiu se.. your chest isn’t that big

Lina- cut it out will ya?

HAHAHAHAHAHA

Lina- not her..

Naga- HAHAHAHAHAHAH see I told you.. look at me.. I have a chest to di for

happosai- hubbahubba yes (he grabs a breast and is flung around helplessly into a rope..

Lina- naga.. I want to do this one on my own..

naga- you can’t lina.. you’re too flat chested.. I suppose I’ll defeat this one fo ryou.. flare arrow!!

Happosai- heyu what’d you do that for!?

naga- freeze arrow<> happosai that smarts

Naga- FIREBALL!!

Happosai uhoh

BoB- it looks like happosai is out for a while.. fried by naga

Lina- you bitch.. this wa smy fight,P> naga- yeah.. well not tonight HAHAHAHAHAHA

lina- ok.. here it is you and me and happosai, next week.. three corners last one standing.. got it?

naga- hahahahahahaha of course I’ve been wanting to geta shot at you for a long time HAHJAHAHAHAHAH Lina- ok… it’s on then

BoB- winner- Lina via naga

Ukyo v. najaro
BoB: Now that everything has somehow returned back to normal, we can to the next fight, Najaro the Wind Wizard Vs. Ukyo the Spatula Girl.

Ralph: Ukyo? U-CHAN IS HERE?

BoB: Calm down Ralph.

Ralph: GO U-CHAN!

BoB: Ahh.. that cage and the water tank is now set up. Ukyo & Najaro both enter the cage.

Ukyo I see you’ve kept your promise Najaro.

Najaro: Por supuesto! Guardo siempre mis promesas.

Ukyo What did you say?

Najaro: Yo habla espanol.

Ukyo Whatever, now let’s see how you Storm Wand fare against the almighty spatula!

BoB: Ukyo rushes in and attacks Najaro. Najaro blocks easily with his wand.

Ralph: GO U-CHAN!

BoB: Najaro looks like he’s trying to cast a spell.

Najaro: Damn! My magic will not work in the cage!

Ukyo Didn’t you know? There is a magic ward around the arena. Your wind magic will not work in here.

Najaro: Puta!

Ukyo What did you call me?

Ralph: What was that? Puta? What does that mean?

BoB: It means “bitch”.

Ralph: How dare he call my U-Chan a bitch! KILL HIM U-CHAN!

BoB: Najaro leaps from one of the cage walls and catapults himself on Ukyo! Ukyo throws some tiny spatulas at Najaro, but Najaro blocks them easily with his Storm Wand.

Ralph: Hey? What is Najaro going to pull off his voodoo doll trick?

BoB: Najaro made a promise with Ukyo before the fights that he will not pull the voodoo doll trick he did with Lina Inverse.

Ralph: Damn! That sucks!

Najaro: Y ahora, esta lucha terminará pronto!

Ukyo Care to speak english Najaro? I don’t understand a fucking word you’re saying!

BoB: Najaro uses the top end of his Storm Wand on the floor. What the? He triggered the trap door mechanism! They both fall out of the cage!

Ralph: NO!!!!! U-CHAN!!!

BoB: It looks like the fight ends in a draw… wait a minute! Najaro’s cape is caught in one of the hooks. Lucky for him! Najaro wins the fight!

Ralph: What?!?! Najaro won?!?!?! HE BEAT U-CHAN???!?!?!?!?!

BoB: Uhh… yeah.

Ralph: Excuse me…

BoB: Najaro gets his cape out of that snatch and lands safely on the floor. It looks like he’s helping Ukyo out of the water. He’s saying something to Ukyo.

Najaro: Senora Ukyo, usted hizo bien en el duelo enjaulado. Es una compasión que usted ha perdido. No se preocupe, allí no es ninguna vergüenza en incidente. Le deseo suerte en cualquier otra lucha que usted consiga en Senora Ukyo.

BoB: I wish someone would bring a translator in here. What the?

Ralph: You’re gonna pay for getting my Ukyo wet!

BoB: Ralph? He’s attacking Najaro!

Najaro: Senor, calmate. No hay necesidad de ser hostil.

Ralph: Shut your mouth Wind Wizard! This is for Ukyo!

BoB: Ralph, get back here! You know you’re not supposed to interfere with the fights.

Ralph: I will fight for the one I love! This is for you U-Chan… HUH?

Ralph: Oh my god! Ukyo got out of the water tank and shoved one of her spatulas up Ralph’s ass! This is disgusting!

Najaro: Ukyo? Que pasa?

Ukyo English please?

Ralph: U-chan, what did you do to me?

Ukyo: I told you I would shove one of my spatulas up your ass if you stop calling me U-Chan. I kept my promises, didn’t I?

BoB: Ukyo violently pulled the spatula out of Ralph’s ass! He has doubled over! Serves him right! What’s this? Ifurita?

Ifurita: It serves you right for interfering with the fight! Now, I’ll be putting you back up to the announcers box, and you better stay there, or I’ll uhh… do something… I don’t know what, but you won’t like a bit.

BoB: Thank you for bringing Ralph back up here.

Ifurita: No problem

BoB: Ifurita returns back to her seat. Ralph?

Ralph: Oh, my ass!

BoB: It serves you right.

Ralph: Can we get to the next fight please? I think I need something for my ass.

BoB: Whatever, let’s go on to the next fight of the evening.

BoB- All right everyone, it’s time for the fight if the century, Talon and Erlos vs. Vivalis and Nellos!!

(Crowd explodes)

Ralph- It is a capacity crowd here in the huge open air arena in the UCTF stadium, and these people here are the few that will actually witness first hand, the deciding moment on weather or not humanity as we know it will go on!

BoB- That’s right Ralph… And the arena has gone totally dark! But wait!

(Lightning strikes inside the arena and the moment it touches down the lights come back on from what appears to be a new generator on top of the UCTF arena, and Nellos and Vivalis are standing in the ring)

BoB- There is lightning in the arena and the lights are once again restored!

Ralph- And there’s Nellos and Vivalis!

BoB- OH my gosh! I didn’t even see them!

(Music starts to play as NWD and Erlos enter)

Ralph- And here come NWD and Erlos!

Erlos- Now to finish this…

(Erlos enters the ring)

BoB- And Nellos and Vivalis don’t even wait for the bell! Both demons leap on Erlos! Erlos trying to throw them off is unsuccessful, but here comes NWD, with Dragon’s Fang! NWD slashes at the back of Vivalis, but Vivalis wearing spiked armor on his forearms spins around and blocks the deadly blade!

Ralph- Erlos grabs the back Vivalis and pulls him away from NWD and throws him on the ground!

BoB- That was really impressive. Vivalis standing a near ten and a half feet tall with a long thin body covered with jutting spikes is not the easiest one to man-handle.

Ralph- And not to mention Nellos. For those of you who don’t know, Nellos is only about six and a half feet weighing 525 lbs of sheer brute strength. He has long dagger-like claws on both hands that are approximately four inches each.

BoB- They are truly a intimidating sight. However it doesn’t look that much like NWD and Erlos are intimidated. Because they are both attacking full force against the demons! Erlos is trying to immobilize the much larger Nellos, while NWD is brutally attacking Vivalis with Dragon’s fang!

Ralph- And Vivalis grabs the wrist of NWD’s hand that is holding Dragon’s fang and twists it around!! And…

BoB- OH MY GOD!!!!!!

Ralph- Oh my!!! Vivalis has broken the wrist of NWD! NWD drops the sword as he is picked up by Vivalis and thrown out of the ring! And just about lands on Charleston and Lenny who are in the front row!

BoB- But I think there are bigger problems now! Nellos grabbing both arms of Erlos, who is wearing his traditional skull mask, throws him into the turn buckle! Nellos lunges in and slashes Erlos in the face, and rips right through his chrome mask like butter!!!! Erlos is now bleeding profusely from the face!

Ralph- And Vivalis turns around and is also heading for Erlos! But Vivalis engulfed in flames! And Shayla Shayla makes a leaping entrance into the ring! And the flames die out but Shayla Shayla creates another fire ball!

Vivalis- Stupid bitch…

BoB- Shayla launches another fire ball at Vivalis, but he passes through it like it were just wind, and grabs Shayla around the neck, and picks here up!

Shayla Shayla- Aaaahhh!!!!!!

Ralph- Meanwhile Nellos just beat the crap out of Erlos in the corner and Erlos is down!

nellos-

(Looking down at Erlos) I told you I was the most powerful demon, but you did not listen because you are a fool. You pathetic little time jumping fag.

BoB- Did he just call Erlos a fag?

Ralph- I think he did.

BoB- And Nellos walks towards Vivalis who is still holding Shayla up by the neck!

nellos- Talon’s girl huh? Well, I suppose that we can..

NWD- Stop!!

BoB- And NWD is back up!

Ralph- May I remind the listeners that this is a fight to the death, there are no knock outs, and no count outs.

BoB- Thanks Ralph. NWD craws back up into the ring with a limp hand, and dives for Dragon’s Fang, but it is picked up by Nellos first!

Ralph- This could kill NWD because he is half demon!

BoB- That’s right, and Nellos strikes the Neck of Dave, and… Only sends him down! Huh?

Ralph- Dave’s conscious must be the dominant one, because Dragon’s Fang had no affect on him!

nellos- Just as well, ripping you apart limb from limb will be just as easy.

BoB- And Nellos picks up Dave by his good arm, and now Vivalis slams down Shayla Shayla and grabs the other arm of Dave! This could get messy.

Ralph- But Up comes Erlos, and he slams Nellos in the back with a punch which sends him to one knee! Nellos quickly gets back up, turns around, and crushes Erlos on the side of the head with a hook! Erlos was blocking there but it didn’t really do too much good considering the immense strength of Nellos!

BoB- Erlos staggers back, and is now sent to the canvas by another devastating hook from Nellos!

Vivalis- Come on! Let’s do this!

BoB- Vivalis is still holding the arm of Dave, but he is hit by and elbow shot from NWD! Vivalis was not expecting that one, and follows through with a thy kick! Nellos now charges at Dave with his shoulder! He connects and sends NWD bouncing off the ropes and back into his clutches!

Ralph- And Nellos, and Vivalis each take an arm of NWD again and begin to tear!

Erlos- Nooooo!!!!

(Erlos raises a single hand and shoots a burst of energy at Nellos, making a small but severe burn on his back)

BoB- A shot from Erlos Staggers Nellos but he quickly regains his composure, and begins to pull outward on Dave!

Shayla Shayla- N…. no.. Some one… help him…

Vivalis- Hahahahahah!!!!!!

(A tearing sound is heard, and blood is now able to be seen soaking through Dave’s shirt)

BoB- NWD is being torn apart! Erlos gets up and attacks the back of Nellos but is sent back by a backhand smack! But look!! Here comes Beowulf, Fireball, Ice man, and Hystalin!

meanwhile
Lina- Guyver, Ryu, Duncan.. we have got to go find the battle do you know where it is?

Ryu- it is in the open air arena.. let’s go!!

Mechafelix2- mmreeeooowwww

Guyver- uhh guys.

Lina- hey!

Guyver- you too lina.. we have got problems… sayien-C and Jin enters

Jin- the mecha cat…

Sayien-C- let’s get it… Duncan- not a good idea guys..

Ryu- it looks like were stuck here

Lina- DAMN!! what if.. what if something happens?

Guyver-Iwouldn’t worry about that, lina… Dave and Erlos know what they’re doing they will win.. they must win

Lina- yeah…

Guyver-

(to self) so who’s gonna convince me?

back at the open air arena
Beowulf Time to die, you demon f*cks!

Erlos- What?

Beowulf oh sorry, I mean, you other demon f*cks!

Shayla Shayla- What… about.. Talon…

Beowulf No not him, just the other… Demon f*cks!

Erlos- Hey!

Beowulf Not you! Those…. Demon f*cks!

(Points at Nellos and Vivalis, who are looking at Beowulf like he is stupid)

Erlos- Now that’s just racist.

Beowulf Damn it! fine, those Demon Americans.

Ice man- I don’t think that they are in America.

Beowulf Why don’t we just kill em, okay?

Fireball- Okay.

Ice man- Fine by me.

Hystalin- Well spoken finally,

Ralph- I don’t think that was very PC.

BoB- Shut up Ralph. And Beowulf draws his war hammer, and Lunges at Nellos! Nellos grabs the shaft of the hammer and stops it though, but Beowulf hits Nellos with an uppercut and sends him back!

Ralph- Look at this! Fireball and Ice man both fly towards Vivalis with a flying kick, which connects and sends Vivalis back to the ropes! Vivalis swinging his arms about blindly hits Fireball in the head making a substantial cut!

BoB- Ice man hurls a cantaloupe sized ice ball at Vivalis and seems to do some damage to his face. But Nellos hurling the much smaller Beowulf into the turnbuckle where Erlos is leaps at Beowulf and slashes him down the back! Hystalin now enters the ring!

Hystalin– Bahamut! I summon thee!!!!!

Bahamut- What’s up Hyst?

Hystalin– What the f*ck do you think!

(Bahamut turns around and sees the claws of Nellos slashing through his own face)

Bahamut- AAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ralph- She can’t say f*ck here but that’s beside the point. Nellos now picks up the much larger Bahamut, and throws him to the ground out of the ring like a rag doll!!!

Hystalin– You son of a……

BoB- Hystalin, leaps and attacks Nellos with a flying kick, but is bitch slapped away like a little bitch!

Ralph- Like a Black Bitch.

BoB- That’s racist Ralph. Hystalin hits the ground but Beowulf now leaps on the back of Nellos and puts him in a sleeper hold!

nellos- What a dumb shi+….

Ralph- Nellos pinches the elbow of Beowulf that is on his neck, and he shatters it!!!!! Beowulf falls off!!!!

Beowulf AAAHHH!!! okay! That wasn’t bright!

Hystalin– Wulfie!!!!

BoB- Nellos his hit by an ice ball but does not seem to be affected by it very much! And he grabs the skull of Beowulf and I think he intends to crush it!!!

Ralph- Vivalis has just beaten the shit out of Fireball, and he shoots a spike out of his arm at Hystalin who is charging Nellos! Hystalin is stabbed through the arm and is taken back and pinned to the turnbuckle!

Vivalis- Hahahah!!! Kill him!!!!

BoB- Nellos is starting to stab his claws into the brain of Beowulf.. But.. What the….

Charleston- Brnz on the canv’s? Hell no!

BoB- Charleston enters the ring and hits Nellos on the back of the head with a bucket of Lenny’s shi+!

Ralph- That’s not shi+, it’s a bucket of rotten yams that he feeds to Lenny.

BoB- No, I think that that’s shi+

Ralph- No, it’s old yams! And we are not even supposed to say shi+ here Bob.

BoB- Fine! I won’t say the S word then. Charleston hits Nellos on the head with a bucket of Lenny’s dung!

Ralph- It’s rotten yams Bob, not dung!

Charleston- Dat, buk’t a rocks will teach yeh!

BoB- Whoops! I guess it was rocks.

Ralph- Yeah, we kinda jumped the gun a bit there I guess.

BoB- Yeah. Well, Charleston hitting Nellos on the back of the head with the bucket of rocks bought Beowulf just enough time to escape! Nellos smacks Charleston out of the ring, and now heads for NWD who is laying unconscious on the other end of the ring.

Charleston- Lenny! s’k em!

(The goat with glasses stares at him)

Charleston- I sed s’k em Lenny!

(The goat with glasses stares at him)

Charlestin- Damn it Lenny!

nellos- Now you die!

Ralph- And Nellos Approaches NWD and raises his claws above his head! This could be some serious trouble!

nellos- There is no escaping me now!

(Nellos thrusts his claws into the neck of NWD)

BoB- I can’t believe he just did that! There are NO signs of movement from NWD now! He does not even appear to be breathing! Oh my God!

Ralph- This is like a ping pong game!

nellos- There! there is your champion! One down, and one more to go!

Vivalis- HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Now our goal can finally be completed! Life as you know it shall soon end!

Erlos- Not quite @$$ hole!

(Erlos holds out his hand and the blue orb appears in it)

nellos- Ha! you are far too weak to have enough power to kill us even with your little demon slaying weapon!

Erlos- You’re right, I am… But they’re not.

(Erlos tosses the orb over to where Fireball and Ice man are. The orb hovers about six feet above the ring)

Ice man- That’s right. It’s the attack of the…

Fireball- BURNING!!!!!!

Ice man- WINTER!!!!!!!!!!

(Ice man and fireball leap in the air, and Ice man creates a large spiked ball of ice in his hands and as he hurls it through the orb, towards Nellos, and Vivalis, it is set ablaze by a stream of fire from Fireball’s hands.)

BoB- And Fire N’ Ice have just used their most powerful attack, the Burning Winter through the orb which magnifies power and hits Nellos!!!

Ralph- Vivalis dove out of the way but Nellos is dead!!! The fierce power of the burning winter magnified by the orb was more than nellos’s body could withstand! Along with most of the ring!

BoB- That’s right! Nellos has been killed, and everyone who is unconscious is now even more unconcious I think, however Hystalin’s arm is unstuck now!

(Hystalin hurries off to find Beowulf)

Erlos-

(To himself) Take that f*cker.

Fireball-

(out of breath) You’re next Vivalis.

nellos- I don’t think so…

Erlos- What the hell???

nellos- Do you think I would be so stupid as to face the entire world on my own? HA! I copied myself as soon as I heard that we were going to fight, I let you fight him, if you won, I would kill you, if you lost, just as well.

(And odd red cloud has started to develop above the corps of NWD)

nellos- What is that?

(The cloud takes form of a large demon that resembles the devil. Hunched over the demon stands over 12 feet. He his long thin claws, and a thin body which is lined with black spines. He has two long black horns about 4 feet each, and long bone white teeth. His wings ate tattered, black on the outside with red lining, and a red interior. The demon’s wingspan is approximately 20 to 25 feet.)

Demon- Miss the real me Nellos???

nellos- Talon… It’s been a long time.

Talon- Too long. Now I will kill YOU just like I did G’dar.

nellos- He, I’m sure you think so. Bu I have something that you don’t have.

(Erlos, still on the ground, outstretches his hand and appears to be transmitting some energy. Suddenly the Blue orb shatters)

Talon- What was that?

nellos- This….

(From nowhere, Vivalis leaps on the back of Talon, and strikes him with a blue staff, the staff passes through Talon’s body like butter)

Talon- AAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Erlos- NO! He has the staff of Xiahau! How the hell did he get that?

Vivalis- A mind is a terrible thing to waste…

BoB- And somehow Vivalis has gotten Xiahau’s staff!! but wait! Here cones Touchstone!

Ralph- This does not bode well for Talon.

BoB- And Touchstone enters the ring!

Touchstone- well this certainly does explain a lot of things. that night when i had the fleeing you were there and I saw Dave.. it was you in Dave.. Talon. i have waited a long time for this.. DIE!!! ,P>

BoB- and touchstone just attacked Talon with his sword and manages to cut his leg.

Talon- what have you got there? that hurt.. I don’t know what your quarrel is with me touchstone but it’s not the time nor place. I’m busy trying to save humanity here

Touchsotne- revenge knows no time nor place.. you… BASTARD

Talon -I still don’t know what I did

Touchstone- I’m from the village of Porton, famous for this sword. You came one day and killed everyone.. including my family.. my darling clarissa… I managed to escape with this sword and the only other survivor, Jacques… in search of you.. for vengeance..

Vivalis- that was your town…

Talon- what the hell are you talking about fiend.

Vivalis-Ihad you destroy that town for the sword he has.. it is.. important to me..

Talon- you controlled me!?!

Touchstone- so it was YOU!!!!

Vivalis-Isuppose so…

Touchstone- then you will die by my hands this night… ,P>

Ralph- touchstone just slashed at Vivalis who catches him and throws him at talon.. touchstone is unconscious…

Talon- you used me to destroy a village.. a peaceful village…you will die tonight Vivalis.. if I go with you that will be fine as long as you go too.

Vivalis- aww isndatcute? da widdodeamon is threating me…

BoB- what the!? Talon is down!!! but Vivalis didn’t do anything.

Vivalis- ha ha fool.. you let anger guide you and it will be your downfall..

Ralph- he just picked up touchstone’s sword. it is glowing red now

Vivalis- it’s time I end your life now…

BoB- he charges at the immobile talon but… oh my NO! that ain’t right.. Touchstone dove in front of the blade and took it into his body…

Touchstone- clarissa.. i.. have failed you… forgive me for not avenging you.. this is a far better thing for me to do.. I’m.. I’ll se you.. you’re beautiful I…

BoB- this is not good.. touchstone is dead.. but the sword disappears into his body..

Talon- that was the last straw… cough

Ralph- talon is trying to move but it looks like his attempts are futile.

nellos- hehe.. that fool…

Vivalis- it’s your turn now

BoB- And Vivalis now with the blue staff again leaps at the injured Talon. But is knocked away by a fire ball from Shayla Shayla!!!! She has regained he senses!

Shayla Shayla- Talon! Save Dave!

Talon- That rhymes.

Shayla Shayla- Damn it Talon! Just do it! If you go back into him both of your lives will be saved! Now just go!!!

Talon- If it for the best…

(Talon reverts back into a gas form and returns to the body of NWD, which heals him, and he rises)

NWD- your right… it is my turn…

nellos- Erlos couldn’t kill me, and I’ll be damned if some little prick like you can. Talon! You are an embarrassment to demons everywhere!

NWD- Cut the shi+.

Erlos- Here!

Ralph- And Erlos rolls over and grabs Dragon’s Fang, and throws it to NWD! Who lunges at Nellos!

(Vivalis dives in front of Nellos and slashes at NWD with the Staff)

BoB- And NWD blocks the impact of the staff but is still sent back unharmed. Wait a minute! Here comes Devilman!

Devilman- Nice try, but it is my job to see that all demons in this world are eradicated, and it’s your turn now!!!!!!

nellos- Another feather-weight.

Ralph- Devilman flies towards Nellos, and Vivalis, but is struck by the blue staff, and…

BoB & Ralph- Holy shi+!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BoB- Oh my God!!! The staff that struck Devilman is made for killing demons, but something has gone terribly wrong I think!!! The impact of the staff has somehow separated Amon from his host!

Amon- For years, I was frozen in ice. When I finally awaken, I am trapped in the body of some little bastard. Who???

Erlos- Well, there goes the neighborhood…

nellos- Well, if it isn’t Amon, I was wondering where you have been hiding all this time?

Vivalis- Well, have I some news for you Amon, An kind of weapon has been created which can slaughter demons like cattle…

Erlos-

(Still on the ground, to himself) Wait a minute, if Talon could be absorbed into Dave like that, then….

Ralph- Well, Amon is here and the world is about to end. What do you plan to do?

BoB- The world is about to end? I plan to probably f*ck anything that moves. What do you plan to do?

Ralph- Keep real still.

(Erlos slowly rises for the first time since he was knocked down, he holds out his hands in a circular shape, and begins to focus. The three demons have just circled around NWD)

nellos- You could have helped up

Amon- Yes, you could helped rule the world, and now you will die.

Erlos- Not quite!

(A charge of energy comes from the weakened hands of Erlos and he absorbs Amon, and all of Amon’s power)

Erlos-

(Glowing) I feel much better!!!!!!!

Ralph- And Erlos charges at Vivalis! Vivalis swings the staff at Erlos but Erlos catches it and kicks Vivalis down!

NWD- (to himself) I’ve been waiting for this….

BoB- As Nellos is looking at Erlos and Vivalis, NWD is..

Ralph- He isn’t!!!

BoB- He is!!!!!

NWD- 80′s EXPLOSION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(NWD does the 80′s explosion and takes Nellos down)

BoB- and Nellos is down!!!!!!!!!!!!! For the first time tonight Nellos has fallen to the ground!

Ice man- We still can do it…. Final attack!

Fireball- Burning!!!!

BoB- Fire N’ Ice prepare to execute the Burning Winter technique, but Fireball is knocked to the ground by Xiahau!!!!

Ralph- What is this? Since when has Xiahau been on the side of Nellos and Vivalis?

BoB- Since the beginning you fool!

Fireball- What the… Xiahau?

BoB- Xiahau attacks Fireball but is knocked back by NWD!

NWD- What the hell is wrong with you?

Erlos- We have bigger problems than him right now!

NWD- Yeah!

BoB- Fireball and Ice man take down Xiahau, Dave grabs Dragon’s fang, and Erlos grabs the blue staff, and both fighters leap at Nellos!

Ralph- Look! Nellos has been struck by both weapons! And I think He’s dead! The devastation of Nellos looks like it may be no more! Again.

Vivalis- You will never win!!

Erlos- I think you’re wrong there pal.

Fireball- BURNING!!!!

Ice man- WINTER!!!!!

BoB- Fire N’ Ice cast the burning winter again, and wait! Erlos shoots a stream of light from his hands as NWD executes his whisper blast technique!!! All four fighters have shot Vivalis with something!!

Ralph- And Vivalis is ripped in half by the blast, but still appears to be alive!!!

Vivalis- We… may.. not kill you…. n…now.. But.. we… will never… y…y… you succeed, Now…. Xiahau!

(Xiahau reaches in his robe and pulls out the book of death)

Erlos- NOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! That will kill us all!!!!!!!

Xiahau– Hayo graciyaa, zugzug, snorbu, lokedar, bad morus tiyrak….

Erlos- The end…

(The whole world goes silent when Xiahau reads the words from the book, every body sitting in their seats trembling with fear, hoping that this is not their last day on earth. As the earth starts to rumble)

NWD- What’s going to happen Erlos?!?!?!

Erlos- The demon from beyond has been summoned.

NWD- How do you stop it?

Erlos- There is no way. Once he has been summoned, there is no way to stop him from running his course. Not you, I, and all of the demons in the world could ever hope to compare to this.

NWD- So this is it? we are all dead?

Erlos- I am afraid so. He will be coming soon….

(The demon’s evil presence is felt by all, but no one sees anything. Everyone is looking around, when out of the crowd, a goat’s head with glasses pops up. And begins to quickly grow)

BoB- What the???

(Lenny starts to hover in the air and grows until he almost totally fills up the entire open air arena)

Charleston- Lenny! Gt down ere!

Erlos- I made the Demon Lenny. World- WHAT???

Erlos- Sorry.

(The huge 100,000 ton goat with glasses begins flying over the land and sucking up everything. Earth, sea, and sky.)

NWD- What is that up there?

(All attention focuses to the new generator)

Mourl- ………… …………… …………………………………. ……………………… …………….. ………………….!…………………… ……………… …………?

Tetsuko- Let’s go!

Mourl- ……………. ……………!

(Mourl pushes a button releasing the huge tranquilizer that the Beakless Mourls have been making. The missile strikes Lenny right in the side.)

BoB- And Lenny has been hit by a huge missile made by Mourl!

Ralph- Look! Lenny has reverted back to his goat form!

(Lenny falls back into the arena and is caught by Charleston)

Charleston- Lenny! I tld ye not to do stuff like dat!

(The goat with glasses stares at him)

NWD- Is it gone?

Erlos- Yes! The demon Lenny was only made to become that form one time! The chemicals on Mourl’s rocket must have neutralized him! We won…

(Everyone in the whole dimension explodes in mass cheers)

(Erlos returns the power of Amon to Devilman, and then passes out. And when Vivalis finally dies Xiahau is returned to normal. Dave holds Shayla in his arms as they stare into the horizon.)

NWD- farewell touchstone…

(Fireball and Iceman give each other a high five)

Shayla Shayla- he you two.. I uh have something to say.

Fireball- what?

Shayla Shayla- it’s about the burning winter…

Iceman- $hit.. not now.. we’re celebrating

Shayla Shayla- no this can’t wait.. thank you.. it saved us all.. just.. be careful how you use it, ok?

(Fireball is at a loss for words.. for a change while iceman just grins)

Iceman- will do!

(Xiahau walks up to Devilamn)

Xiahau– What happened Devilamn- I’m not entirely sure… but.. well.. I don’t know.

Xiahau– ahh.. I see.

NWD- something doesn’t seem right…

Shayla Shayla- what?

NWD- just.. I gotthis nagging feeling that this isn’t over yet.

Fireball- are you kidding? we thrashed em.

NWD-IknowIknow.. it’s just.. well.. something’s not right.

Shayla Shayla- don’t worry about it hon.. we did good.. a lot of good.

NWD- yeah. I supopse so.

(they turn back to look at the horizon, to the future an more importantly.. to the unknown.)

BoB- Well, hell of a fight I’d say.

(Ralph has passed out)

BoB- What a weak hearted man… well, I guess we’ll see you next week… good night all!!!! winner: all of humanity

Epilogue:
Lina- hey look!!!

Guyver- the sun? it’s been awhile.

Ryu- they must have won.

Lina-Iknew they would…

Duncan- uh huh..

Saien_c- Hey where’d the cat go?

Duncan- likely, straight into the middle of what’s next.

Jin- what is next?

Lina- that’s a good question.. how about dinner?

Guyver- you would say that.

Ryu- well I am a little hungry

Lina- YES!!! Let’s eat!!

BoB- Hello everyone and welcome to the second most critical round of the tournament the final four! I’m Bobby Hinden here as always with me is my fight analyst, and co-announcer Ralph Gerrard.,
Ralph- Hello

BoB- Tonight is set up very well. We will first finish round four which will be Devilman vs. Guyver, and Shayla Shayla vs. Mourl. Then we will move on to a few other Fights. These will be: Kasume vs. Anthony Maltempi,

Ralph- Isn’t Anthony dead?

BoB- Don’t interrupt Ralph. Then we have Ryu vs. Shampoo, Xiahau vs. Artimus, and finally New Wave Dave vs. Mysterious One. That I am waiting to see.

Ralph- Me too Bob, they are probably the two biggest rivals in the whole UCTF.

BoB- Yes they are.

BoB-Well.. Damn! No time to talk here comes our first fighter of the night Devilman!

(Crowd explodes)

Ralph- And listen to that reaction! The crowd is really into this one!

BoB- They sure are Ralph. And Devilman enters the ring! The crowd is on their feet! Here comes his adversary now, Guyver!

(many cheers still proceed)

Ralph- Look! there is someone following him! He is wearing a hood though so we can’t see just who he is. But I think that it is his sparring partner! The figure that is always in the shadows!

BoB- I’ll bet it is too! look at that! Shinji is at ringside! What is he doing there? And so is Hystalin! This could result in another riot!

Ralph- Who on earth is that in the front row?

BoB- Oh! That’s the new janitor Charleston, and his little goat with glasses, Lenny.

Ralph- That goat looks ridiculous!

BoB- Give him a break! He’s nearsighted! Anyway, the janitor does not get paid a whole lot, so they gave him and his goat front row seats to all of the fights here. And Guyver enters the ring with the hooded figure! Devilman looks at the reff, and points at the figure!

(Devilman is about to speak but is cut off buy Guyver)

Guyver- Well everyone. I think that it’s about time you knew who my friend here really is!

(Crowd cheers)

Guyver- Well I would like to present to you now, my friend, my sparring partner, and the newest edition to the UCTF, the one and only Duncan MacLeod!!!!

(crowd cheers)

Bob- And Duncan MacLeod, is the one that we have all been waiting to see! He is the figure in the shadows! He is…..

Ralph- What now?

BoB- Look at that!!!

(Spawn enters out of no where)

Spawn- Did you actually think that I would not have my revenge?

Guyver- I’ll kill you Just like I did all the fighters before me!

Duncan- No! Let me handle this menace.

Spawn- Good… Devilman can take care of you, I’ll just send you a small message with the life if this feeble fighter…

BoB- And Shinji Is entering the ring, being followed by Hystalin! Hystalin grabs Shinji from the back and throws him to the ground! Shinji Gets up and punches Hystalin! She tries to dodge but is unsuccessful! Shinji grabs Hystalin and and pushes her back to the seats! And here comes Beowulf!!!

Beowulf- You Bastard!

BoB- This is becoming a riot I think!

Ralph- look up there! A fan has started throwing chairs trying to instigate another riot!

(camera zooms in on the fan throwing chairs)

BoB- That’s no fan! It’s Mourl!!! What is he doing there??? Oh well. Getting back to the fights, Beowulf and Hystalin are gone, but Shinji is unconscious on the floor! Spawn attacks Duncan with his chains! Duncan blocks several with his sword but still gets cut on his arms! Spawn wraps up Duncan’s sword and pulls it away from him and Tries to punch Duncan! Duncan dodges, and counters with a kick! And it connects!!! Sending Spawn back! Spawn charges at Duncan! Duncan grabs Spawn and attempts to throw him down but gets entangled in the chains! Spawn hits Duncan with a head butt! And Sends him back a bit! Spawn is opening up with the punches! With the spiked knuckles that Spawn wears, his punches are devastating! And Duncan is quickly bloodied! Duncan tries to escape, but Spawn throws him in a corner, and wraps a chain around his neck! Duncan, facing the fists of Spawn is in serious trouble!!

Ralph- Guyver charges at Spawn but is tackled by Devilman! Both fighters arise and Devilman blasts Guyver in the face with a beam from his antennae! Guyver goes down, but quickly gets up! Guyver extending his vibroblades slashes at the head of Devilman! But his blades are avoided!

BoB- Spawn is punching Duncan! And Duncan goes Down! This could be it for Spawn and MacLeod! It is! Duncan has rolled out of the ring and Spawn is leaving now. Shinji has just gotten up

Shinji- What is going on here! Well, it doesn’t look like anyone is interfering here. I guess I can sit down now…

(Shinji sits down)

BoB- And Devilman able to avoid the vibro blades of Guyver was not able to avoid a sonic blast! Devilman is hit and goes down! Guyver attacks Devilman while he is down, but Devilman grabs the leg of Guyver before he is able to do anything, and trips him! Guyver makes two rolls towards Devilman trying to catch him with his vibro blades but he is unable!

Ralph- And Guyver did not hurt himself this time. That is a good thing. However he has severely cot the canvas on the ring.

BoB- Devilman gets up and jump kicks the still rising Guyver; sending him down! Guyver quickly regains his footing and attacks Devilman with another blast! Devilman is able to dodge this one but is unable to make a landing in the ring! Devilman falls out of the ring and lands on the floor! Guyver Jumps out of the ring after Devilman but Devilman gets out of the way so Guyver can’t hit him right off the bat! Guyver swinging His vibro blades at Devilman is unable to connect! Devilman shoots another ray from his antenna at Guyver! Guyver mostly dodges it but still gets grazed! Devilman and Guyver charge at eachother and lock up! This is a test of strength, Both fighters wrestling to throw the other down!

(Devilman kicks Guyver under the arm and Guyver trips Devilman

BoB- And Guyver sends Devilman Down! Guyver leaps on top of him and elbows Devilman in the face! Devilman able to grasp the wrists of Guyver and keep himself from being slashed to ribbons, Guyver is in control though! Devilman Wraps His antenna around the head of Guyver trying to rip the face piece from him unsuccessfully! Guyver desperately trying to slice Devilman, but is unable to get his wrists free! Devilman Stabs Guyver in the face with his Antenna!

Ralph- I never knew they could be used for that!

BoB- Neither did I Ralph, but it looks like they can be! And Guyver pulls back and grasps his face, as Devilman punches him in the chest three times!

Ralph- I don’t think that did a lot of damage, but it sent Guyver back!

BoB- I think that was Devilman’s intent. And Devilman re-enters the ring and will wait and see if Guyver is unable to come back! If not he will be counted out!

Ref- 1 2 3 4 5 6 7…

BoB- Guyver has stumbled back to the ring but has not re-entered yet!

Ref- 8 9..

Ralph- And Guyver Gets a leg in! The count stops!

BoB- And Devilman punts Guyver back! and the count is started again!

Ref- 1 2 3 4..

BoB- Guyver shoots a beam at Devilman! Devilman is grazed by it, and goes down! Before the count reaches ten Guyver Flies back into the ring! This could be it for Devilman if Guyver has regained his strength!

Guyver- I have worked to get here a long time… And I am not going to let it all go to waste because of a deamon like you..

(Devilman on the ground)

Devilman- Me? What about New Wave Dave?

Guyver- Don’t change the subject! I am not going to let myself lose…

Devilman- You’re not going to have a choice Guyver. get it through you’re medal head!

(Devilman rises to his feet)

Guyver- We’ll see about that!

Devilman- Yes we will…

BoB- There is an exchange of words there between fighters and they start to size eachother up. Devilman and Guyver both shoot at eachother at the same time, and are both blown back to the ropes by the explosion! Devilman charges at Guyver who ready’s his Vibro blades. Devilman wraps up the arms of Guyver with his antennae, and leaps and knees Guyver in the face shattering the face piece and basically everything on the face of Guyver!

Ralph- Now that is a fight ender if I’ve ever seen one!

BoB- I think it is too Ralph! Guyver bounces off of the ropes and falls foreword! Devilman is hanging on the ropes and it is over!!! Devilman will go on the finals!!! What a fight!!! What a fight!!! Tremendous effort on the part of Guyver! He has nothing to be ashamed of! He fought magnificently! The crowd is on their feet now and the entire Underdark charges the ring to congratulate Devilman, who is rather beat up.

(crowd is chanting Devilman)

Devilman- Excuse me, excuse me everyone! I would like to thank all of you for your support. If it were not for you I probably would not be here. As much as I dislike to say it though… You are a great fighter Guyver, and I glad we were able to have a fairly clean fight.. Between us that is. And good luck.

(crowd cheers)

Devilman- Also, I would like to thank the Underdark, who has always been there for me. And on to the finals!!!!

(Crowd cheers)

BoB- Well that was touching. Let’s move on shall we?

Ralph- Lets.

Winner: Devilman

BoB: Next up is the match to determine who will face Devilman this Sunday for the INtergalactic Title.
Ralph: And what a match-up we have, MOurl, the beakless Turkey whose tricks are only outspoken by this delicious corn

BoB: And what corn it is, Ralph, When I come home from a hard day at the office there’s nothing like a fresh can of Beakless corn.

Ralph: (reading in monotone) That’s right Ralph, uh i mean BoB, it is perfect for picinics, Bar Mitvah’s and wakes. Beakless corn… (shows can) It’s not just for dinner anymore.

BoB: well that was the easiest $30,000 I ever made.

Ralph: yeah second for me.. the easiest was not testifying against Nixon in the waBEEEPPP

BoB: Woooh Ralph the censonr’s must really have in in fo ryou today..

Ralph: the *&(^%&ing *^ (^*(*

BoB: ON with buisness, MOurl will be facing new lighter Shayla Shayla

Ralph: and here she comes now, escorted by SKULD!?!

BoB: yeah Ralph, didn’t you get the memo, dave’s out meditating and comming to terms with his inner deamon

Ralph: But what about his fight against the mysterious one?

BoB: The other memo is to hold the fight to the las minute, if he doesn’t show Lina INverse will take his place.

Ralph: I dig.. just one question remains though

BoB: what’s that?

Ralph: what’s with dave and Redheads?

BoB: I don’t know.

Ralph: Here comes MOurl now.. he’s pulling behind him a wagon of corn with a sign that says “FREE: Take one” WHAT A HUMANITARIAN!

BoB: I don’t trust it ralph, i know how expensive that stuff is.. it’s too much to give away, tis is probably just one of his tricks.

Ralph: It doesn’t really matter, the fight’s about to start.

DING

BoB: And the fight is about to start.. i think.

Ralph: They’re just both standing there, MOurl cocks his head to one side as Shayl Shayla prepares for one of his tricks

Shayla: Oh no bird… the other’s were too agressive they couldn’t see the tricks cause they were too headstrong.. I’m gonna be alert and wait you out.

BoB: I have a feeling this is going to be a LOOONNGG night

Ten MINUTES LATER
Shayla Shayla: Come on Bird.. show me what you’ve got…
BoB: MOurl places a can of corn in the center fo the ring

Ralph: AND TEHY BOTH JUST STARE AT IT

Ten MORE Minutes later
BoB: and the fight rages on as Shayla Shayla sizes up her opponent… again
Ralph: OHH LOOK!! MOurl tilted hsi head… again

30 more minutes later
BoB: you got any tens?
Ralph: go fish

twenty minutes later
BoB: Mourl takes a step forward as Shayla Shayla prepares for the worst.. it’s ANOTHER CAN OF CORN?
Ralph: what doe sthat make it now 33?

BoB: MOre like 34 i think

Ralph: This is getting REALL Tedious

Fourty minutes later
Shayla Shayla: OH let’s cut the crap… i’m gonna fry this bird now!!!
BoB: Shayla shayla just shota bolt of fire at Mourl, who dodges it but trips over a can of corn, hits his head on another can of corn and is out cold

Ralph: we waited for THAT!!! NO TRICKS!?!!

BoB: doesn’t look like it Shayla has already been declared the winner

Ralph: that has to have been the longest fight in UCTF History

BoB: and shayla shayla will face Devilman this sunday for the intergalctic title

WINNER: Shayla Shayla

BoB: well that last match seemed to last forever.. let’s hope this next one is short and sweet
Ralph: and that is exactly what critics have been dubbing this matchup “short and sweet” that is to say maltempi is short and Kasume is sweet

BoB: speaking of sweet, here comes KAsume now. She’s carrying sometthing I can’t quite make it out

Ralph: IT’S A PU PU PLATTER isn’t that nice of her?

BoB: yes this is the first time a fighter has ever made PUPU for her opponent

Ralph: Spaeking of which where’s anthony?

BOB: here he comes, being escorted by six short chubby guys in black suits… he must be in that box they’re carrying…

Ralph: and Paul Bearer is leading the group of short cubby guys

BOB: THEY JUST DUMPED HIS BLOODY CARCASS IN THE RING

Paul bearer: OOOOOO.. sorry about his.. Maltempi’s gonna get you so you better get ready to– HEY!! IS thata pu pu platter?

Kasume: WHY YES it is.. would you liek some

Paul Bearer: oooo could you hand me an egg roll?

Kasume: why of course… here you go Mr. Bearer

Paul bearer: ooo this is delicious.. the best pu pu i’ve ever had

Kasume: why thank you.. here have a rangoon

Paul Bearer: MMM soooooo tasty..

BoB: Paul bearer jut made off with the entire pu pu platter!!!! munching it down as he runs.. or uhh waddles quickly out of the arena.

Kasume: that wasn’t very nice… I made that Pu pu for anthon– woops.. hmm… I wonder who put this bloody carcass here? oh well.. I’ll just clean it up.

Charleston: WOO HIPPIYEAHYA wadda woman!!

BoB: She just swept maltempi out of the ring

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Ralph:There’s a suprise.. Kasume just beat the corpse of a dead midget.. go figure

Winner: KAsume

BoB: no time to waste on to the next match… Shampoo v. ryu.
Ralph: we should have an excellent match up here ryu being a martial arts master and shampoo being a amazon warrior

BoB: Ryu’s on his way in… he looks confident..

Ralph: I’d liek to see xena fight shampoo

BoB: SHUT UP hentai.. here comes shampoo now…

Ralph: that’s not shampoo thats a cute little kitty cat

BOB: same thing… shampoo gets in the ring and starst licking her paw.

Ryu: SHORYUKEN!!!! Ralph: and the little kitty cat is fried like a egg on the black pavement on a hot winters day

BoB: HUH?

Ralph: never mind… it’s time for a commercial break.. when we come back we’ll have Xiahau v Artemis.. see ya the

The scene opens up with a woman takinga shower.. she calls out..

WOMAN: HONEY! where’s the dead cat?

Man: it’s uhh in the soap dish

Woman: but there’s SOAP in the soap dish

Man: it’s uh in the soap?

Woman: what?

Man: that’s right you get one dead cat in every bar of daed cat soap

Anouncer: used only as directed

Ralph: we’re back an i think i’m gonna vomit

BoB: Which is understood.. since you use dead cat soap.. and how appropriate after that last incredibly short battle…

BoB: here comes the blue staff Xiahau now.. he look a little dazed and confused but he also looks ready for a fight… and he is atatcked while enteirng the ring by Artemis who was hinding in the crowd this match has started a little prematurely.
Artemis throws Xiahau into the center of the ring and lunges at him with his dagger.. Xiahau moves out of the way

Ralph: OK I’m back

BoB: good to see ya

Ralph: Xiahau gets up on his feet..

BoB: I think he’s a bit more alert now

Ralph: yeah true true. but artemis attacks him again Xiahau nails him inthe back of the head with his staff after dodgeing that attack… Artemis falls out of he ring.. but gets back in right away

BoB: what finess these two possess.. and what a fight this will be

Ralph: Artemis just cut Xiahau’s right arm.. that’ll leave quite a scar.. and blood on the ring

Bob: charleston is going ot be pissed

Ralph: no he doesn’t look happy at all… lenny’s not too bad though

BoB: xiahau sweeps hsi staff under artemis’ feet knocking him tothe ground and—

Ralph: another ralph: hey guys i got us some hot dogs for the— who the hell is this?

BoB: oh no there’s TWO ralphs… Ralph (hot dogs): hey buddy.. what’re doing in my seat.. with mY BODY

Ralph (in seat) What do you mean this MY seat and MY body.. why are you impersonanting me

BoB: HEY Isn’t that Ukyou? Ralph (hot dogs): U-chan? where?

ralph (seat): yeah so?

BoB: get out of his seat you imposter… who the hell are you?

Caius: why caius the deamon, who else?

Ralph: you bastard!!! I’ll get you

Ciaus: I highly doubt that.. but things have definately gone too far here.. i’ve been found out and i must take my leave.. ARTEMIS!!! WE MUS GO!!

Artemis: I’m kinda in the middle of something here

Ciaus: It has to wait.. (he flys down and sweeps artemis away leaving Xiahau bleeding on the mat

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

BoB: this match is over!!!

ralph: that damn copycat.. i’ll ^*(^&*

BoB: he’s a deamon, Ralph.. you’re an announcer.. it ain’t gonna happen

Winner: Xiahau

BoB- All right everyone, it is time for our last fight of the night. Mysterious One vs. New Wave Dave. Now this is a big rivalry here Ralph.
Ralph- It sure is Bob, These two have been at each other since the get go.

BoB- That’s right, I think that they have some of the most violent words toward each other out of everyone. Which makes me really interested in how the fight’s going to go.

Ralph- You know Bob, there have been rumors that NWD has not been found yet and won’t be at this fight.

BoB- He better show up! There has been too much build up to this fight on his part, that if he misses it there will be a lot of pissed fans out there.

Ralph- Yeah, I agree. But look, here comes our first fighter now!

BoB- Yes! It is the good old Mysterious one, and… Wait a minute.. His eyes are glowing bright red!

Ralph- Wow, he looks pretty scary.

BoB- Yeah. MO enters the ring, and is greeted by a multitude of cheering. and now we are awaiting the entrance of NWD.

Ralph- Assuming he does make an entrance that is. Shayla is there at ringside.. he has to show up.

BoB- Yes Ralph! And it is once again a capacity crowd here at The Open air arena in the UCTF grand stadium. And ummm… NWD should be entering soon.

(Time passes, and Mysterious One takes a seat in the ring)

BoB- And that was a really… here come;s Lina Inverse!!

Ralph- she’s ready ti take on mysterious one

Shayla- Lina!? what the hell are YOU doing here?

Lina- what do you mean? you tod me i was to face MO if dave didn’t show up

Shayla: I said no such thing.

lina- then who did?

Ralph- Look! Here comes NWD!

BoB- Finally NWD has decided to grace us with his presence. I think he would have more supporters at this point if he was here ten minutes ago. But, never the less, there is a warm welcome for him from the crowd, and NWD jumps into the ring!

Ralph- Finally! We can get this fight underway!

BoB- And it looks like MO, and NWD are not going to wait for the bell! MO jumps up and NWD readys for an attack!

Ralph- And this is really pleasing the crowd! They have been waiting a long time for this and are glad to see that the fighters aren’t wasting any time!

BoB- MO, and NWD seem to be sizing each other up in the ring! Both fighters lunge! It looks as if NWD… Wait!!! They stop mid punch!!! They did not hit each other!

Ralph- What the hell!!!!

MO- You!!!!

NWD- (Grin)yes.. that’s right

BoB- What the hells’ going no here

MO- it’s been a while

NWD- yes it has… one question.. where do you lie?

MO- Lie?

NWD- yes.. do you support our old deamon comrades or not?

Ralph- Are we going to get to see a fight or not?

NWD- Well, I suppose we should get this fight underway. weathe ryou support them or not you lead beowulf to kill andre.. and for that you will pay.

MO- Yeah, good luck! And don’t think that because we are old friends I will go easy on you!

NWD- whatever

MO- Let’s go!

NWD- You got it!

BoB- I still don’t believe this! NWD attacks MO with a barrage of fast punches, MO dodges and pulls a spinning back kick and knocks NWD into the ropes! NWD bounces off, comes back and hits MO with a punch to the throat! MO goes down! NWD stomps on MO and MO rolls out of the ring to avoid NWD!

Ralph- MO seems to generate a force attack and he shoots NWD! NWD goes back to the ropes!

BoB- That’s right and MO jumps back into the ring and leaps, with a flying kick at the head of NWD. And he connects!!! NWD goes down! MO punts him out of the ring under the ropes!

MO- Come on NWD! You can do better than that!

NWD- I’m just warming up!

BoB- NWD points at MO.. and lifts him off the ground… and rops him on his head. he runs over and puts MO into a full nelson!

MO- Impressive Dave! You know damn well that won’t work!

BoB- And MO head butts NWD with the back of his chrome mask and NWD lets go! He is a bit bloody from that hit! NWD attacks MO with a rolling scissors take down, MO is on the ground! Dave starts punching MO violently with both fists!!! MO is struggling to get away but can’t! MO Grabs NWD by the shirt and pulls him down and head butts him again! Man, that mask id deadly! The face of NWD is very bloody now, but MO is warn out quite a bit! Both fighters arise and start to size each other up and MO attacks! But NWD counters with a back flip kick with both legs! MO goes back to the ropes and NWD pulls a spinning round house and knocks MO out of the ring again on to the ground about five feet away! And MO is hurt!

NWD- Are you ready to die now??

MO- hehe, Not quite Dave. I have one more attack that I have been saving and I am dying to try it on you!

NWD- do your worst!

MO- Okay

BoB- And MO jumps into the air and totally illuminates his body with energy!

MO- Now feel the power of the Mysterious Final attack, Hiro-shi-ka-den!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(MO shoots a huge serge of power totally enveloping NWD)

BoB- And MO falls backward totally exhausted from the final attack which knocks NWD down!!!!

Ralph- Wait! MO is up!! And NWD is up as well.. i thought we’de have a double count out there!!!

BoB- that is obviously NOT the case…

NWD- Very very good.. MO that kinda stung

MO- I supopse you can do any better

NWD- oh you just wait…

BoB- Dave just garbbed MO’s chrome head… he seems to be focusing all his enrgey into it.

NWD- NOW it’s time you witnessed MY final attack… WHISPER TO A SCREAM!!!!

A huge blue aura si surrounding moth men as they scream in pain

NWD- AUUGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

MO- AUUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

NWD- AUUGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

MO- AUUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

NWD- AUUGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

MO- AUUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

NWD- AUUGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

MO- AUUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

NWD- I rensfer all the pain and suffering you and yours have caused to you… AUYGGGHHHH

MO- AAHGGHHHHH I will never… concede

Ralph- this is truly amazing… i can’t believe that these two are enduring as much pain as it looks that they are enduring without blacking out

BoB- such are the ways of deamons

Shayla- Dave!!! be careful… you’re gonna kill hiM!!!

NWD- and what if I want to?

Shayla- you’ll take yourself out too

NWD- SO WHAT!?! I’m a deamon now shayla… I don’t deserve life

Shayla- but I LOVE YOU!!

NWD-AUUGHHH Despite the fact that i am part deamon..

Shayla- you have laways been part deamon dave.. and i have always loved you

BoB-sniffsniff.. that;s so touching isn;’t it?

Ralph- kinda gets you right here

MO-AUGHHHHHH!!

NWD-AUUGHHHHH!! ShaylA!!!! I.. I LO— AUUGHHHH

BoB- the two have been knocked back by the force of the pain that Dave has stored up insdie fo him… and they’re both out cold as eskimos

BoB- That’s right! And we have our first draw here in the UCTF! There is no winner here!

Shyala- NOOO dave!!!! (she carries him out if the ring as beowukld enters with spawn as they carry MO out fo the ring

ralph- what a night this was.

BoB- You bet. Let me have the honors of saying, Goodnight all from us here at the UCTF grand arena. And, Good job to Devilman, and Shayla Shayla, good luck to the both of you in the final match!

Ralph- Ditto Winner- Draw

BoB- Welcome everyone to our thrilling round 2 of the first ever tournament in the UCTF. We have got a hell of an opener here for you, it is Goul’dan of the Underdark vs freelance fighter Xiahau.

Ralph- Now I find Xiahau interesting, because here he is in round 2 of the tournament, and he lost to Shinji.
BoB- Well, Shinji is a great fighter. It could have been a contrast of styles, but Shinji is good, you can’t put that past him. Here comes the first fighter of the night, and it is Xiahau. Xiahau enters the ring ,and now out comes Goul’dan

(croud cheers)

BoB- Goul’Dan is getting more cheers here, but it is close.

Ralph- Yeah, the tourney is usually pretty diverse in this matter.

BoB- And the bell sounds! Goul’dan charges at Xiahau, but Xiahau dives out of the way, spins around and trips Goul’dan with his staff. Goul’dan quickly gets up and forms an ice ball with his hand and throws it at Xiahao! Xiahau, pole vaults off his staff and kicks Goul’dan! However it doesn’t seem to do too much damage! Goul’dan grabs Xiahau around the waste with both hands and lifts him up! Xiahau jams his staff down Goul’dan’s throat! Goul’dan drops Xiahau and immediately grabs the blue staff that is in his mouth! Oh my God!! It is too late! Xiahau has hit Goul’dan in the neck, and caused serious damage! Goul’dan spits up the staff, but falls to his hands and knees!

Xiahau- A worthy brawler indeed, I can not match you physically, however, your rashness was your downfall. To be successfull you must be at peace with all, and totally ballance yourself. That and only that is the key to obtaining, total enlightenment

(Xiahau falls to his knees)

Xiahau- Father! I follow your teachings, and I achieve victory!

BoB- It appears as though Xiahau is having an mental break down but who can tell from here. And the ref has stopped the fight, and our winner is Xiahau!

Winner- Xiahau

BoB- Alright everyone it is time for our second fight of the night, Ukyo Kuonji vs. Guyver.I am interested to see how this one goes because, it will be Guyvers first real fight in the tournament.
Ralph- Yes, and this is after Ukyo beat Sailor Bowser, which was good practice for for this upcoming match tonight.

BoB- It sure was, and it may prove useful against somone who has only beaten a little penguine. Not saying that Penpen is bad though.

Ralph- Of course not.

BoB- Here comes the first fighter now, and it is Guyver. now this being the tournament there are sever cheers for him however there are also several boos. Mostly, I think coming from new light fans, and people from Furinkan. And Ukyo enters the arena looking ready for a fight. And here comes Guyver, it sounds as though Guyver is getting a better reaction but I really can’t tell. Guyver enters the ring!

Ralph- do you think that Shinji will interfere now?

BoB- I doubt it. And the bell sounds as Guyver extends his vibro blades, and Ukyo draws her spatula! Guyver makes the first advance with his blades at Ukyo, but she dodges and counters with her spatula to the back of Guyvers head! Guyver is hit with a glancing blow and is not too affected by it. Guyver shoots a beam at Ukyo but she flips out of the way and is not hit! Guyver again coming at ukyo with his vibro blades, but Ukyo flipping backwards, holding out her giant spatula is able to successfully evade guyvers attack, and land a clean blow to the face of Guyver, sending him back! Guyver shakes his head and comes back though! Ukyo takes several swings at the head of Guyver, which seam to daze him even though he is trying to block! Guyver puts a hole in Ukyo’s spatula with one of his vibro blades!

Ralph- Guyver needs to be careful with his blades there, if he is just covering his head like that he may hit himself with one of them.

BoB- I don’t think that Guyver would be that careless. Ukyo backs off to save her spatula from being severd by guyvers blades, as both fighters regain their foothold. Ukyo takes a swing at Guyvers legs but guyver easily jumps her spatula with a short jump! Ukyo takes another swing, this time at the mid section of Guyver… And Guyver cuts off the head of her spatula with a vibro blade!!!

Ralph- That’s what he’s been waiting for!

BoB- It sure is Ralph! And Ukyo flips back onto the turn buckle and throws 5 smaller spatulas at guyver! Guyver Dodges them and shoots a beam of some sort at Ukyo! Ukyo jumps to the other turn buckle! I think that Ukyo officially has no chance now Ralph, with her big and small spatulas gone!

Ukyo- Wait!!!

Guyver- huuuu?

BoB- And it appears, that Ukyo has her hands in the air.

Ralph: Appears?!?! BoB, how much do we pay you.. look.. she DOES have her hands in the air.

Ukyo- Maybe next time sugar! I am not going to get cut up over some lousey tournament! Good job Guyver. You are a great fighter…. You win…

BoB- ukyo has forfeited! it’s over!

Ralph- This federation gets weirder by the match. But At least my love si saving her beautiful face from becomming marred.

BoB:shut up loverboy.. Guyver’s talking now

(Guyver retracts his vibro blades)

Guyver- Good match Ukyo, I guess I just got the upperhand this time.

Ukyo- Yeah. But it won’t happen again buster!

(ukyo Leaps off)

BoB- What a show of good sportsmenship, and Guyver will advance to the third round in the tournament!

Winner- Guyver

BoB- Well folks here’s what a lot of you have been waiting for myself included. It’s the Devilman, Kuno fight. This should be a great fight to watch, not necessarily a close fight, just a fun one.

Ralph- That’s right Bob, the odds makers have it 11 to 1 in favor of Devilman. However you have to take into consideration what Kuno did to his last opponent, compared to what Devilman did. Kuno beat NWD in under 3 minutes, and Devilman barely won. And people are saying what a crappy fighter NWD is, but you don’t actually know because Kuno is the only one he has faced so far.

BoB- So you are saying that NWD is actually really good, and Kuno is awesome, and just stomped the s#!+ of him.

Ralph- What I am saying is, we can not be sure that Devilman is so much better because we don’t know what kind of fighter NWD is.

BoB- Thanks Ralph, but here comes our first fighter now! And it is Kuno, there are many screams from female admirers here but over all, most people are just sitting silently awaiting the coming of Devilman.

(The lights go out and the crowd goes wild, as several spot lights hit Devilman in the air flying in)

BoB- And here is Devilman! As you can tell by the sound of the crowd! It is electric here tonight!

Ralph- It sure is! And Devilman has just landed in the ring, and the lights are back on!

BoB- This should be a fight to remember Folks.

(Ding!)

BoB- And there’s the bell! Kuno charges at Devilman, and swings his bokken at him! But Devilman catches it in his bare hand! And with a surge of power sets it ablaze!!!!

Ralph- Oh my goodness!

BoB- Kuno lets go of his flaming bokken, and Devilman with light speed thrusts his hand at Kuno and grabs his face! Devilman quickly pulls Kuno a little closer to him and hits him with an uppercut, sending Kuno back to the turn buckle! Devilman jumps at Kuno punching him in the chest, and then hits him with a Hook!

Ralph- Boy did that have some power behind it!

BoB- Kuno falls down and rolls out of the ring! Devilman raising his hands in victory, but Kuno gets up! Devilman spins around and shoots Kuno in the face with a laser from his antennae, sending Kuno back to the ground!

Ralph- I think that’ll end it Bob…

BoB- And it does! Kuno is lying on the ground showing no signs of movement. And is counted out! Devilman wins!!!

Ralph- now that wasn’t even close Bob. I mean Kuno didn’t even have a chance! Could imagine what would have happened if Devilman was fighting NWD?

BoB- Actually Ralph it was your little illustration that said Kuno might win!

Ralph- No no Bob, I just said we didn’t know that Kuno would be that helpless against Devilman.

BoB- Oh well, let’s just move on to the next match ralph!

Ralph- Gladly! This one was too quick for me.

BoB- I agree, let’s go!

Ralph- Yes lets.

Winner- Devilman

BoB: and now, a word from one of our sponsors

Hello, I’m not an actor, but i play one on TV and i’m being paid lots of money to tell you to buy this new collection of 40 great unclaimed melodies… songs so horrible the composers themselves refused to tack thier names onto them you get—

(suddenly the sound of a record slowly stopping is heard and NWD comes on pushing the actor’s actor off the screen)

NWD: Screw these bad songs man.. how about some good ones…

AGWF/UCTF fighting star New Wave Dave here and have I got na offer for you.

88 top new wave songs of the 80s, as selected by the ultimate 80s dj himself New wave dave.. you get songs like

(the songs play as they scroll on the screen)

Too Shy by Kajagoogoo
Mickey by Toni Basil

Birds fly (whisper to a scream) by Icicle works

Our House by Madness

Der Kommisar by After the Fire

(cut to dave) Cause Falco sucks

The Funky western Civilization by Tonio K

I don’t like mondays by the Boomtown rats

(cut to NWD) AND SO MUCH MORE… NWD’s 88 songs fo the 80s only $19.95… oh wait I mispoke only $10 a cd for 7 cd’s NO SHIPPING!! it’s covered in the cost… so what the hell you waiting for.. act now!!! operators are patiently awaiting your calls

1-888-new-wave

BoB: AND WE’re BACK with our next match up…

Ralph: Its should be very interestig to see who this turns out.. we haven’t really heard much from either fighter so we can only assume that they have been in intense training.
BoB: That’s right Ralph… and it should also be interesting to see just how this show goes

Ralph: here comes rally now… she looks ready to fight

BoB: not to mention the great Geat Beowulf who is entering now as well

Ralph: the GREAT GEAT!?! HAHAHAHAH That’s good..

BoB: Thanks… Rally pulls out her guna nd shoots at Beowulf who blocks it with his shield

Ralph: The great Geats Great shield looks like the bullet didn’t even scratch it

BoB: sigh… he charges and swings with his sword and misses as Rally moves out of the way she fires again and the bullet is once again blocked by bewulfs shield

Ralph: The great Geat is in great shape tonight don’t you think?

BoB: yes but i’m sure you don’t

Ralph: HuH?

BoB: nevermind… rally has jumped on the top rope.. she attempting to jump kick Beowuf from way up there

Ralph: and rally jumps at the Great Geat only to fidn that the great geat has moved… with the speed and strength becomming of a great geat the great geat beowulf slams his great fist into the mat causing it to shake liek a great earthquake… now he MMMMHMMMPH

BoB: NOw the mighty BoB has put ducktape on the not-sogreat ralphs mouth so we can get on with a serous commentary of the match… Rally is in pain and unable to stand as beowulf picks her up bythe waist and flings he rover his shoulder.. he then drops her on her head… she looks to be in great pain (oh now he’s got me doing it) She’s reaching for her gun and attempts to fire… but it seem sto be empty… what’s this someone seems to be hovering over the ring.. it’s.. oh my demon god it’s Ifurita

Ifurita: HI EVERYONE!!!! I hope no one minds but I am supposed to end this fight early so we can get on with the night

BoB: Oh WOW she’s caused a mini tornado in the middle of the ring.. i don’t believe it teh two fighters are being sucked into it but beowulf has a grip on the ropes… this wind is torrent and i’m losing papers and teh tape just got sucked off of ralph’s mputh

Ralph: OOOWWWW!

BoB: Rally was just spit out of the tornado.. she’s heading this way LOOK OUT!!!!

Ralph: AS you can see Rally has landed on our announcers table and smashed it in half… we’re gonan have to move to table two for the rest of the match

Ifurita: Uhh help… i don’t know how to stop this thing

BoB: then we have a problem.. we’re gonna take a HUGE break as we move to the toher stadium.. away from this G*^&damn thing while Ifurita tries to figure out how to stop it

Winner: Beowulf

A rerun of Miami Vice is played followed by a rerun of the love boat

BoB: Ok after that I’m sure only our most Loyal veiwers are left..

Ralph: we did not PLAN on showing old love boat episodes and Miami Vice.. it just happened

BoB: we apologize to our viewers for haveing to give them a dose of a fate far worse than the tornado was which as i understand, completely destroyed the ring before a fan gave Ifurita a copy of Wanderers 5, which she watched, was confused as to why someone video taped her huge tornado accident and then realized that she needed Afura’s help… once that was done the love boat was over and we’re back

BoB- Now folks, I have got to admit. I have probably been looking foreward to this fight more than any other. Because I could have guessed that the Devilman fight would turn out the way it did. And this fight, really I think that it is safe to say: damn near anything can happen.

Ralph- I don’t think you can say damn here Bob.

BoB- Sure I can! damn isn’t censor’d is it?

Ralph- Huh?

BoB- You know, censorship! Like I cant get across f#^&, or s%#$, or c0$& sucker, It just can’t happen! But I can say damn.

Ralph- But not G@$ Damn. You can say God. And then you can say damn. But you just can’t say G$% damn.
BoB- What the hell was the point of that ralph?

Ralph- I don’t know.

BoB- But, you are correct, i can say: the cock crows every morning, and I can say that I want a sucker, but I can never say c#$^ sucker

Ralph- Or just plain c$%^ for that matter Bob. What about ^&*%%$( ^&&%%^& *)() ^%% of (&)^*^ and &*^%%?

BoB: no i think that’s completely out

Ralph: Sh*^! I shold be ableto say whatever i want to

BoB- That’s right! I say, to hell with Censorship! It can kiss my @$$!!

Ralph- Now what’s the deal with that, that little @$$ thing. It looks like @$$ but is still censor’d.

BoB- Some little s#!+ head down at the sensorship bureau, that that he would be a smart @$$ and do it like that!

Ralph- Yeah! Since I can’t let others see what I am saying, then I can say what ever the f*&% I want to!

BoB- Way to go Ralph! Make a stand!

Ralph- I am Bob. uhhhh… f*&$, s#!+, f$%&, f$%&, b!+@&, f#$&, c0@$ sucker, mother f#$%er, piece of s#!+, dildo…. Hey I can say dildo. f$%*ing……

BoB- Let’s hear it for Ralph!!!

(the crowd cheers)

Ralph- Thanks.

Winner: NO ONE CARES

BoB- Well Ralph, I would LOVE to sit hear and listen to you swear all night, but we have some more fights to commentate.

Ralph- Oh yeah.

BoB- Thanks to Ralph, we have missed the entrance of Mourl, he is already in the ring. But here comes Shinji in the EVA1! And… THe EVA seems to be wearing a chefs hat, an apron, and wielding a putcher knife. Hey guys!!! This Thanksgiving thing is getting a little old!!!
Ralph- But I like it…

BoB- Shut up Ralph! And the bell sounds! Shinji tries to stab Mourl, but Mourl dodges! Mourl flapping around the ring like a lunatic is evading every swipe of the knife, from Shinji! And Mourl flies into the air! Mourl is flying!

Ralph- I didn’t think turkeys could do that! Especially beakless ones!

BoB- Me neither. Wait! It appears that Mourl is now throwing potatoes at Shinji. Potatoes always seem to stop people from acting up. Now I am not sure where all these potatoes are coming from but Mourl is throwing them at Shinji and the EVA is looking a bit disorientated!! And Shinji trips and falls out of the ring! Now it looks as if Mourl is landing on the EVA!

Ralph- What is going on here?!!?!

BoB- Mourl with his turkey talons has pulled a part off of the EVA, and has pulled out Shinji! This is insane! It appears as if Mourl is flying up to one of the lights WAY, up above the stadium with Shinji!

Ralph- Shinji is punching and tearing at Mourl but it is doing no good!

Shinji- Let me the hell down! This is not funny Mourl!

Mourl- ………………………………………………………………………! ………. ……………………………………………………………………………………….. ………………………………..? ………………………………………?!?!……….. …………………………………………………………………………………. ………………………………………………………………..

BoB- It is too far for me to hear, but it seems as though Mourl and Shinji are having an argument 200 feet above the ring as Mourl flies towards the lights!

Ralph- Oh no… He didn’t!?!?

Bob- He did!!!! Mourl just hung Shinji on the stadium lights hundreds of feet above the arena!!! Mourl returns to the ring and Shinji is counted out!!!!!

Ralph- For crying out loud!

BoB- Your winner here is Mourl, and yes he will be advancing to the third round, to fight the winner of Midnight Rider vs. Akira! And I don’t know about all of you, but I am looking foreward to see what Mourl pulls next!

Ralph- We should move on soon, but don’t you think that someone should help Shinji down?

BoB- Nah, let’s move on!

Ralph- okay

Winner- Mourl

BoB: *COUGH COUGH* Ralph: We shoulda *COUGH* had this fight outside
BoB: Yeah since the motorcylce entrance of these two has caused the entire place to be filled with carbon Monoxide

Ralph: *cough cough* EVERYONE were have prepared fo rthis.. there are gasmaskes underneith your seat.. please put them on

BoB: Much better.. though all the smoke makes it hard to see

Ralph: Oh my gosh this is a rare treat… we’ve been joined in the booth by president Tarot

Tarot: hey guys… just wanna say you’re doing a great job

BoB: please don’t say great

Tarot: I am here to announce that as of tomorrow i will not allow any vehicles into the arena unless they have passed the UCTF E-check

BoB: good idea.. we can avoid situations just like this

Tarot: That’s the idea.. we’ll i’m outta here.. good luck commentating in this smoke

Ralph: sure… it looks like akira has punched the midnight rider pretty hard.. or wa sthat teh midnight rider punchng akira

BoB: Someone down there just smaked the other with a quartrstaff

Ralph: the guy who jsut got hit has just been jumped upon.. i think.. the guy with the staff.. i think it’s midnight rider.. is pounding him merclessly

BoB: the staff is now been transformed

Ralph:into what?!?

BoB: F&*ed if I know

Ralph: oh no niether manis holding a staff… it’s been kicked out of hte hands of the user by the other

BoB: no we’ll never be ableto tell who’s fighting who.. one guy just jumped on the top rope and has executed a really cool looking kick

Ralph: probibly not Tetsuo

BoB: the other guy got nailed and is onthe ground

Ralph: thatsound!!! it’s the fans.. someone turned ON THE FANS!

BoB: WHAT are you talking about i don’t think anything can sexually stimulate this bunch of losers

Ralph: NO not THOSE FANS.. the fans that are clearing away the smoke

BoB: i can make it out better.. Midnight rider has Akira by the leg and is pulling HARD… akira gives up and passes out…

Ralph: This match is over

Winner: Midnight Rider

BoB: now for a fight that most fans have been waiting for the new light’s Shayla Shayla v. Guyver’s new tag partner Tenchi Masaki

Ralph: an interesting match this should be.. last week NWD said that we would learn the identity of the NEW light leader tonight

BoB: and hopefully that will happen in this match.. shayla makes her way to the ring and waits for tenchi, who is just a few seconds late.

Ralph: Shayla Shayla is ready to fight as she takes an engaurrde position… tenchi “turns on” his sword and attacks shayla who blocks it with a fire shield spell.. she then dodges out of tenchi’s fleche and pushes him out of the ring.. she then casts a HUGE fire shield spell around the ring.. Tenchi tries to get in but can’t… just then Ryoko swops down picks up tenchi and teleports him inside the fire shield…

BoB: Ryoko has just left and Shayla looks pissed

Shayla Shayla: so one of your many girlfriends came to save you huh?

Tenchi: WHO ryoko?no no no she’s—

Shayla Shayla: can it.. i don’t care.. BoB: She basts him with avery low intesity fire blast he looks to be in a lot of pain.. she lowers the huge shield.. picks up tenchi and slams him down on the ground and places a fire shield in a dome shape, inverted, around tenchi.. there’s no room for Ryoko to get in there.. he’s counted out

Ralph: WHich seems to happen more oft than not

BoB: NWD is making his way down to the center of the ring to congratulate Shayla.. he’s got a mic in his hand

NWD: Shayla.. good job.. youare the only meember of the ne light to move on to round three.. i’m proud of ya

Shayla shayla: yeah!?! oh well uhh.. ok gee thanks, i uh.. umm I mean IT WAS NOTHING.. the little pervert had it comming

NWD: so you all want to know who are true leader is huh?

The crowd goes wild

Nwd: our leader is none other than (the lights go out.. when they coem back on a hooded figure is in the center of the ring) Hooded figure: MEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

(she removes her hood to reveal that she is in fact SKuld)

Skuld: I’m the true leader of the new light.. he-he.. and as my first act as leader i issue an invitation to Adreniline Express… I can fix that e-check thing for free if you join us.. what do ya say?! WOAH Gotta go bye now(she is gone)

BoB: so the goddess Skuld is the new light leader huh? shoulda guessed

Ralph: that NWD is worse than tenchi if you ask me.. ukyo, ifurita, shayla shayla and now Skuld…

BoB: hey.. he’s got animals and fujisawa as well

Ralph: beatiality and a substance abusing stablemate.. great

BoB: please don’t say that

WINNER: SHAYLA SHAYLA

Ralph: ok Azusa has already made her way to the ring as well as Goury..t hey’re wasteing NO time at all here

BoB: Goury has called forth the light form his balde and

Azusa: IT”S SO CUTE

Ralph: and no one is suprised

BoB: THIS TIME, however, azusa got hit prettyhard by Gourry;s left foot

Ralph: he wouldn’t let lina have it he sure isn’t gonna let Azusa have it.. BoB: but azusa just picked up a huge man and has thrown him at goury, who dodges

Azusa: gimme my uhhh my uhhh.. Odine!!

BoB: she’s thrown the ring bell, a chair.. Tatewaki kuno!!!

Ralph: it’s a good thing kuno is legal in this tournament

BoB: She’s just picked up a bench with twenty weight watchers applicants on it… she’s holding it above her head when goury retracts the light blade

Azusa: it’s not so Kawaii anymore

Bob: OHH THAT’S GOTTA HURT.. she just dropped th bench o fat f^%S on herself.. she just knocked herself out!!!!

Goury: am i ever gonna get a real fight?

BoB: he will get a real fight this sundaywhenhe faces Shayla Shayla! But until then..we gotta go!!!

The crowd in the UCTF grand colleseum has been anxiously awaiting the start of the first ever Ultimate Crossover Tournament fighting Card. Many days of waiting in line for tickets will soon pay of when they will be able to see the multiverse’s greatest fighters do battle.

As if to welcome them all President Tarot has made his way to the center of the stadium. he’s donning a trenchcoat, sunglasses, leather gloves and a black brimmed hat. He tilts his hat back, he looks quite young, somewhere between 25 and 30. the microphone he holds n his left hand is brought up to his lips.

“How are we tonight?!” The crowd begins cheering wildly as Tarot seems to be enjoying the response.

“I wish to welcome you all to Ultimate Crossover Tournamant Fighting. let me tell you all someting, the response i have been getting for this fighting league is outstanding. If it weren’t for the interest that you all showed this night would not be happening. I don’t want to waste your money by babbleing all night, so I say LET THE BATTLES BEGIN!”

He exits the arena and takes a seat up in the center balchony.

Just as he sits down a figure makes his way to the center of the arena, it’s Rezo the red preist. He looks calm and ready for his match with Nugutsu Mushuru, who is running into the arena now.

Rezo v. Nugutsu

After several seconds of silence Nugutsu breaks it. “Rezo… you will die now.” Rezo merely smiled. “I’ve been there. I’m not about to let it happen again.”

“You do not understand, your sight is your weakness.”

“You fool! I am blind as well.”

“Oh I see, well maybe this will be harder than I thought.” he draws out his katana and charges at Rezo. instead of striking him, though, he merely bounces off of a shield field created by the red priest

“FLARE ARROW!!!”

Several tiny flaming arrows chase after the fallen nugutsu who is able to dodge each of them as if he really could see. Not wanting to risk runing into an invisible wall again he throws his blade at Rezo, who in turn…

“STONE SPIKE!”

several Pillars emerge fromthe ground protrudng several stories into the sky. Nugutsu happened to be on one of them.

However the hilt of Nugutsu’s blade beams rezo in the ehad sending him flailing to the ground. he hits is head on a rock and is out cold. Nusutsu is still on the pillar.

“Uhh.. can somebody get me down from here?”
WINNER: Nugutsu

As the grand staff attempts to rid the arena of the spikes, as well as help Nugutsu down from his, the attention is turned to the giant monitors on the four main corners of the arena

It’s getting ready to show the warehouse match between Bill Clinton and Shayla Shayla

Bill Clinton v. Shayla Shayla

Bill is driving a fork lift to the center of the warehouse while Shayla Shayla sits atop an overhead crane. She looks ready for a fight. Bill, on the other hand looks ready for something else.

“Come on down, hon, and gimme some hot lovin’.”

Shayla couldn’t believe what she was hearing, a man who she was about to fight was trying to escape it by charming her. It wouldn’t work, but she would play along anyway.

“Sure.” She jumped down off of the crane and shouted a battle cry. Or at least it sounded like a battle cry.

“HENTAI!!!!”

With that she kicked Bill sending him off of his Tow Motor. He laughed. “You must really like me sugar”

“Ha!”

“Come on over here and give us a kiss huh?”

They did not notice that the fork lift ran staright into a stack of boxes sending them tumbling to the ground and covering the fighters completelty.

The place was quiet and still untill–

FWOOSH!

Bill burst out from beneath the boxes with his clothes on fire. “Hey, what’s you do that for!?”

Shayla emerged fromt he pile of burning cardboard. “You know damn well why I did that.”

“Come on, it’s just a breast.”

That really got to her. “Only a breast!? ONLY A BREAST!?” Her rage was full, burning with the fires she controled.

Bill knew what was about to happen. “Uh.. look I’m uh sorry… I’ll take you out to a nice dinner, buy you some flowers. Whatever you want just don’t–”

It was too late, Shayla was far too pissed to listen to reason or negotiations. A steady stream of fire prodruded from her wrist as if it were a flame thrower charring the president. She then kicked him in the jaw, he fell down very dazed. She picke dhim up and hooked him to the overhead crane. She operated the crane like a dock laborer over a compost heap and lowered him slowly into it.

“Damn pervert”
WINNER: Shayla Shayla

The monitors faded out and then back to a field as Shayla uttered these final words. a load crash is heard and teh next match is ready to take place

Shootingstar v. T-rex

Bob and ralph make there way to the announcers booth, late as usual.

Ralph- we can’t stay long, we’ve got dinner dates

BoB- Well folks, for this next match we move to our open air ring because the President thought that it might get a bit crowded in there with these next two fighters. That’s right folks, for all of you brave enough to attend this match up we have T-Rex vs the dragon Shootingstar. As I can see clearly now our first fighter is entering from our left side and it is T-Rex. and after only a few steps he enters the fighting area.

Ralph- That’s right Bob, with fighters this size we really were not able to have a actual ring. So we cleared a much larger fighting space.

BoB- That was a vivid description there Ralph.

Ralph- Why thank you Bob.

BoB T-rex is now standing in the area but there is no sigh of Shootingstar. I wonder where he is?

Ralph- Maybe his tail is dragon today?

BoB- Thanks for the pun there Ralph. Shut up. Hmmm this is odd, there is no Shootingstar. T-rex has just taken a seat in the center of the fighting area. And we are really starting to run behind schedule here. We could cut to a commercial now if there were commercials here, but I guess we aren’t that lucky eh Ralph?

Ralph- No

BoB- I would like to add here that the combined weight here of these two fighters is over

Ralph- Wait!!!!! Look at that!!! in the sky!!!!!!

BoB- Oh my God. It’s a bird, it’s a plane, holy s#*$ it’s Shootingstar!!!

Ralph- I don’t think you can say s%$& on here Bob?

BoB- And Shootingstar swooped down into the fighting area and flies back up again! Wow ralph, this is tremendous!

Ralph- Oh, I agree.

BoB- Shootingstar circles around and lands in the center of the fighting area, and the crowd Explodes! Wow the chant of “shootingstar” has begun. And they begin! T-rex gets down low and starts biting at Shootingstar’s softer underside. But Shootingstar is able to easily distance him with with his long talons. T-rex rears up but before he is able to do anything, Shootingstar lunges! Shootingstar has a firm grip on T-rex’s upper leg! T-rex is trying to bite the back of Shootingstar’s neck, but Shootingstar’s arms are flailing and keeping T-rex from getting his head too close. Those claws could take out an eye too easily.

Ralph- But look, T-rex is kicking the underside of Shootingstar. And there is some blood there. Oh my! Shootingstar pulls away to avoid the deadly kick of T-rex and takes off a chunk of his leg! T-rex falls to the ground!

BoB- Shootingstar now sinks his teeth and claws into the stomach of t-rex tearing it apart. woah, scales are flying everywhere! Shootingstar is now thrashing into the intestines of T-rex.

Ralph- I’d say this one is over.

BoB- NO! Look T- rex has just bitten into the ankle of Shootingstar with his last gasps. And Shootingstar lets of a roar that I think broke all of the glass in this dimension. Shootingstar stops going at T-rex’s stomach and takes a look at his ankle, It has about 200 teeth sunk into it, and is broken I think.

Ralph- Yeah, it is definitely broken.

BoB- Hey look at this! Shootingstar has severed the still attached head of T-rex. And he is flying off…. Well Shooting star is obviously the victor of this match, since the open carcass of T-rex is now rotting on the floor. Good thing he’s only a machine. But Shootingstar did not escape this fight without a scratch, not by a long shot! He is lucky that he did not lose a wing, or worse. I would not call this a perfect victory.

Ralph- Nope, not at all.

BoB- Thanks Ralph.

A regualr ring has been lowered intot he arena for the next match…

Agent D v. Forrst Gump

BoB- Alright folks, this next match I think is going to be a pretty interesting one I think. It has been called by some “the Agent vs. The Idiot” That’s right it is Forrest Gump vs. Agent D a very unlikely match up if you ask me Ralph. Ralph-Uhhh yeah bob.

BoB- Killer drop in there ralph. Whoop, here comes the first competitor entering the ring, and by the sounds of the crowd i am assuming that it is agent D.

Ralph- I agree. this is really an anime supporting crowd I think there bob. And yes I can see now, it is in fact Agent D.

(D enters the ring very solemnly, wearing a trench coat)

BoB: Okay now here come Forrest running into the ring, wow he got there pretty quick, maybe he thinks that he has got a chance after all.

Ralph- I think that he does bob, from all that I have heard from him. he has been very optimistic.

BoB- And theres the bell. Right away D pulls out a sword that he had stashed away in his coat and charges forrest with it! Forrest is running away!!!!!

Ralph- Actually bob he is running in circles around the ring….

BoB- That’s right Forrest is simply evading the blade of D. Not that I blame him though. WAIT. Forrest jumps off the ropes and behind D. Forrest puts D in a sleeper hold from behind. d drops his blade and starts grabbing at Forrest’s arm. Forrest really applying the pressure now! Wow this may be an upset!!! I think it will be! D falls to his knees and is turning red. Forrest still putting on the death grip.

Ralph- Look, D has gone completely limp! his hands slide off of forrest’s arm.

BoB- And Forrest lets D fall to the ground! Forrest is now stomping on agent D. But it looks as if D is starting to show some movement again. And it is a remarkable show of strength by D here even keeping awake! Maybe he is used to this kind of stuff? And D rolls out of the ring eluding the trampling boots of Forrest Gump. But wait! As D is catching his breath Forrest has climbed to the top rope! He jumps at Agent D with a foreward kick, but D dives out of the way D running around the ring trying to escape the crazed Alabaman looks fatigued, but is still making an effort. Forrest is catching up to D, and D pulls a back hand, and cracks Forrest right in the jaw! Forrest flies back about six feet and lands on the ground! D jumps back into the ring under the ropes. And removes his trenchcoat… he seems to be wearing a pick teddy. you can hear forrest speak

Forrest- momma always said men who wear women’s underwear are fun to laugh and point at.

Ralph- Look D is going for his sword again! I don’t think he liked that comment about his attire.

BoB- He didn’t.

Ralph- You know bob, I would think with all of the high tech technology that D’s race has, he would use a weapon slightly better than a sword.

BoB- I agree but never the less, a sword is what he has. And D has sliced through the ropes and is taunting Forrest to come back into the ring. Hey, Forrest is returning, he is going right for the blade of D’s sword.

Ralph- What an idiot.

BoB- And D slashes at the head of forrest Gump. Forrest falls down and out of the ring with a huge slice down the front of his head and face. But Forrest gets up! Wow that took some guts. Forrest staggers towards the ring. Agent D kicks Forrest in the head almost removing the skin. NOW THAT HAD TO HURT!

Agent D- Stupid is as stupid does Forrest!

Bob- Agent D is now taunting forrest again Ralph, this guy is ruthless!

Ralph- He sure is.

BoB- Thanks for that comment there Ralph….. And it looks as if Forrest is not getting up. Yep, here comes the medical team. And this fight is over, after 17 minutes and 58 seconds Agent D about skins the head of forrest. Well now fro something a little more cheerful eh?

Winner: Agent D

As they drag forrest off on a stretcher the announcers take leave for our next match

NWD v. Kuno

Der Kommisar plays over the loudspeakers as New Wave dave makes his way to the ring. he’s wearing his usual sportcoat (black with red nwd on the lapel and the words “Rock On” on the back) a pair of black jeans, an xtc Black Sea tour shirt and a pair of hiking boots. the crowd seems to love this guys even though the major bookies have him losing. He just looks like he’s out to have fun.

Taktewaki Kuno makes his entrance. he’s wielding his boken, as usual and appears to be quite arrogant, as usual. He speaks.

“As a giant may squash a bug between his toes without enduring but a scratch, so shall I destroy thee, insolent welp.”

“ha ha. A giant huh? Kuno, I remember reading a story about a guy named dave who destroyed a giant with a couple of stones.. well, giant, Dave is here!”

“You dare mock Tatewaki kuno, blue thunder of Furinken high. New Wave Dave, I SHALL SMITE THEE!”

Kuno charges Dave. “AYETATATATATATATATATA—” ans is cut short by a little girl.

“There you are Serge, I’ve been looking all over for you.” It was Azusa, and she had fallen for Kuno’s boken.

“He’s so CUTE.”

“Small child, this is Tatewaki kuno’s sacred boken.”

“Uh-uh, it’s Azusa’s little Serge… give him to me!” She starts to pund Kuno with a frying pan named “Collete.” “SERGE SERGE SERGE!” the frying pan has been upgraded to a chair named “Jean-Claude,” “SERGE SERGE SERGE!” Now Azusa has picked upa startled NWD and throws him at Kuno, they both fly into a turnbuckle and are knocked out. Azusa picks up Serge, uh I mean kuno’s Boken.

“It’s okay, Serge, I’ll protect you.”

WINNER- Double count out, no contest

AND NOW THE MAIN EVENT

Kome v. Roland v. Rally

the entire place goes black and when the lights do come up we see rally sitting in a corner with kome and roland sitting in the middle, a voice is heard over the loudspeakers. “a day will come when all will fear me.. this is just an example of the power i hold in the darkness.. rally concider his a gift and an invitation to join me

Rally looks down at the ground, “Uh Gimme soem time to think about that one okay?”

The voice speaks again, “you have until wednesday, gunslinger”

The place goes black again and when the light come up the entire stadium is empty

Winner- Rally Vincent