*We show the UCTF Arena in
Bob: and Welcome to On Your Computer SEVEN! Withme is The Orange Crusher, Jeice, Ralph the Hentai Commentator Gerrard and yourstruly, Robert Bob Hinden! Tonight.. Will Dan survive a cage filled with four ofthe greatest UCTF Fighters of all time!? Will William Clarke open up Ethan’sface like a proverbial bag of chips, or will Ethan prove that the UCTF is his“RPG”?! Will SSS save Ran from the clutches of Raven Darc, or will--
Ralph: we see some puppies, or is Bob just goingto keep rambling on?!!?
Bob: >=|! Let’s get to the first match!
Fortune, Fame
Mirror, Vain
Gone insane
BUT THE MEMORY REMAINS!!!
Chastity Marks vs. AlleyOmega
*"The Memory Remains" by Metallica can be heardthroughout the UCTF Arena! Out comes the disco/punk vampire, ChastityMarks! With her are Mercy, her sister, and her pet werewolf, Fuzzy. Most of the people in the crowd cheer for the former Anime Champion, but thereare a few people in the audience
who boos Chastity...*
Ralph: BLOOD-SUCKING PUPPIES!!! H_H
Bob: Don't you ever get tired of saying that?
Ralph: Are you gay?
Bob: >:|
Ralph: Yeah... exactly!
Jeice: H_H yeah...
*Chastity slips to the ring, and Mercy watches nearby the apron. As for"Fuzzy", Chastity's pet werewolf sits nearby the audiencebooth. Fuzzy lies down and takes a nap. Jeice eyes Fuzzy with alook that can make a healthy man die of a heart attack!*
Jeice: That thing better not piss on my leg... orthat thing will cease to be! >:|
Ralph: I hope she fed her before she came... o_o
Let the bodies hit the floor!
Let the bodies hit the floor!
Let the bodies hit the floor!
Let the bodies hit the... FLOOR!!!
*"Bodies" by Drowning Pool starts up on theJumbotron! Alley Omega arrives to the ring! With her is herentourage: Peach Otola, Sapphire Otola, and Fujiko! As Alley and hergroup walks down the ring, she looks toward Chastity as if she's the devilincarnate! As they get to the ring, Alley slips in and wastes no time inbeating the snot out of Chastity!*
*DING!*
Bob: This fight sure started up quickly!
Jeice: A lot of people think that Chastity cost Alley her match against X
and Recon... and apparently, so does Alley...
Ralph: H_H Damn... those puppies can really bite!
Bob & Jeice: RALPH!!!
*Chastity and Alley starts brawling immediately! Chaz sneaks in a startpunch upon Alley, but Alley grabs Chaz arm in mid-strike and puts her in anarm-drag suplex! Chaz quickly gets up and narrowly ducks a savate kickthat would've been upon her face! Chastity grabs Alley's leg and pullsher to the side.*
Bob: Damn! o_o
Jeice: These two look like they hate each other, mates!
Ralph: H_H!
*Alley gets back on her feet, only to get hit with another Star Punch to theface. Alley grips her face, giving Chaz enough time to nail a facebusterupon Alley. Alley staggers for a bit, and Chaz nails a bitch slap onAlley, which knocks Alley back to the real world! Just as Alley tries foranother bitch slap, Alley grabs Chaz's hand and counters with a kick to themid-section. Then, he puts Chaz through a German Suplex! Chaz fallson her neck, giving Alley some time to make a pin. But before the refereecould
count, Alley gets back on her feet very quickly.*
Chaz: I said I was sorry for screwing you outof your match last week! x_x
Alley: Yeah... but I still want to kick your ass anyway! >:|
*Chaz hits Alley with a Shadow Elbow! Alley is pushed back several steps.Chastity bounces herself on the ropes, and tries for a missile drop kick, butAlley ducks! Alley grips onto Chastity's legs and catapults her to theropes, where she hits the turnbuckle! She staggers, and tries for a sidesuplex on Chastity! Chastity flips over and lands on her feet! Alley turns around, but Chaz kicks Alley upon her mid-section and nails a DDTon Alley!*
Bob: DDT on Alley!
Jeice: I hope this match doesn't end in a draw... unlike the last one.
Ralph: Whoever wins, everyone knows that puppies will come out on top!
Bob & Jeice: -_-...
*Chaz goes for a claw Swipe, but Alley makes damn sure her face doesn't getslashed again. She nails a spinning heel kick on Chastity's face,knocking the disco/punk vamp off her feet. Alley picks Chastity up andputs her through a Serpent Coil Suplex. With no way to counter her move,she his hit hard on her back! Alley keeps her position and tries to rollher up for a pin, but Chastity manages to roll herself to the side, avoidingthe pin! Alley lets go, crawls on top of Chaz, and starts to pummel her facelike a punching bag!*
*WHAM!*WHAM!*WHAM*POW!*BLAM!*BLAOW!*
Chaz: >_<
Alley: Your ass is mine, you undead whore!
*Just as when Alley lands another punch, Chastity grips Alley's hand, nearlycrushing the bone. Chastity's eyes appear red with anger!*
Chaz: Do NOT call me an "undeadwhore"! >:|!!
*By now, Chastity is feeling mighty angry... because Alley had to call her an"undead whore", again! She throws Alley off of her, gets backon her high heels, and nails a Reaper Kick upon Alley. Then, she grabsAlley's head and drives makes her gets really acquainted with her rightknee! After that, she Moron Bops Alley to the nearby turnbuckle... beforeshe powerbombs her in the middle of the ring!*
Chaz: >:|
Ralph: Damn... she's pissed!
Bob: I'd be too if I would be in her shoes! o_o
Jeice: Heh... I bet you can fit in her high heels, Bobby! >:]
Bob: :|
*After giving Alley such a beating, she spins Alley so that she's face-first onthe mat. Then, she sits on Alley and pulls her hair! Alley can feelher locks being pulled out of head from her roots! Alley screams like adamn banshee! After a few seconds, the referee had to pry Chastity off ofAlley!*
Ref: I thought I told you know hairpulling?! >:|
Chaz: Heh... excuse me... e_e
*Then, she does something that shocks everyone! She pulls the refereeclose to her and jams her fangs into the referee's jugular! She drinksthe referee's blood until he faints! She throws the referee's limp bodyaside, and she's now left alone with Alley!*
Everyone watching: X_X!!!
Bob: What the hell?!
Ralph: She... she killed the referee?!?!
Jeice: Crikey! o_o
*Now that the referee is out of commission, Chastity resumes her attention toAlley. Chaz bares her fangs! Alley slowly gets back on her feet andis completely oblivious to Chaz at the moment! People in the audiencestart to quiver in fear, thinking that there's gonna be a repeat performance!*
Bob: Oh no... don't tell me she's gonna...
Ralph: I think I'm gonna hurl! X_X
Jeice: Weaklings! :|
*Chastity grabs Alley by the back of her head! She's about to bore herfangs into Alley's jugular, but she finds something on Alley's neck... an ironchoker!!!*
Chastity: What the hell?! o_O????
Alley: I knew you were gonna bite me again, so I came prepared! >:]
Chastity: DAMNIT!!! >_<
Bob: Whew! What a relief! X_X
Jeice: Heh...
*Alley flips Chastity over her head! Chastity ends up sitting up on herbutt, and Alley nails a missile drop kick to the back of Chastity's head! As ifthat's not enough! She picks Chastity up by her hair! She hoists
Chastity over her head and drives the vamp down on her head with a brainbusterthat echoes throughout the arena! As Chastity falls on the ground, Alleyadds an exclamation point to the fight with a leg drop across
Chastity's jugular! Alley makes the pin! 1... 2... 3... but noreferee!*
Jeice: Alley could've won the match!
Ralph: Yeah... I guess what Chaz did to the referee is working for her!
Bob: H_H!
*Alley picks Chastity up and performs the Oklahoma Stampede upon Chastity!After slamming the vamp on the mat, Chastity quickly returns to her feet with abounce! Chastity tries for a jump kick upon Alley, and hits! Alleystaggers slightly! Chastity bounces herself on the ropes and tries for atilt-a-whirl leg scissors on Alley! Alley is thrown to the other side ofthe ring!*
Chastity: That's for calling me an "undeadwhore"! >:|
*Alley is on her knees and gasping for breath. She looks to the heavensand becomes transparent! From her body comes the image of several animalsthat stampede toward Chastity! Each of them hit Chastity and explodesupon contact! Chastity ends up being blown outside of the ring! Alley sneaks herself out of the ring to deal with Chastity first-hand! She makes her way to Chastity, who's getting back on her feet. Alleygrabs the back of Chastity's head and slams her face upon the outside of theturnbuckle!*
Bob: Ouch! >_<
*Then, while holding onto the vamp, Alley gets a running start and throwsChastity not only through the metal steps, but also THROUGH the barricades!Chastity peels off of it, leaving an impression of her body upon thebarricades! Alley drags Chastity's body back into the ring where shebodyslams Chastity and follows with an elbow drop!*
Bob: Looks like Alley's gonna win!
Ralph: H_H Doesn't matter to me! The puppies will still win!
Bob & Ralph: e_e!!!
*Alley tries for a pin on Chastity! But then, for some unknown reason,Chastity lifts her legs so that they're viced between Alley's neck! Ironchoker or not, Chastity flips Alley off of her! She gets back up andwalks toward Alley. She picks Alley up and nails a shoulder breaker onAlley! Then, Chastity picks Alley up again, and slams Alley's head on the matwith a powerful...*
*BLAOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!!!!!*
Alley: X_X
Bob: PILEDRIVER!!!
Ralph: That's got to hurt!
Jeice: Damn! o_o
*Mercy is cheering for her big sister while Sapphire, Peach, and Fujiko screamsfor Alley to get back up! Chastity pins Alley on the mat! 1... 2...3... but still no ref!*
Chaz: o_o? Huh? Ah, damnit! >_<
Bob: LOL! She just remembered she killedoff the referee!
Jeice: LOL!!! That'll cost her!
Ralph: You just had to feel sorry for Chaz... even if she sucked the lifeout of the referee... literally! x_x
*Chastity starts to have a tantrum, seeing that she could've won the match, butdidn't because of something she did! Alley smiles as she gets back on herfeet! Alley nails a spinning heel kick on Chastity! She holdsChastity by the head and walks along the turnbuckle for a thunderous TornadoDDT! While Chastity is on her back, Alley climbs up the turnbuckle and jumpsoff with a moonsault, driving her knees into Chastity's sternum! Shemakes the pin...*
Bob: There's still no ref!
Jeice: Oh no? Look!
*Another ref makes a running slide into the ring and makes the count!*
Ref: 1... 2... *KICKOUT!*
Alley: Damnit! How can I... o_o? What the hell?!
Chaz: >:]! *licks her lips*
Bob: Uh oh...
Jeice: Not good...
Ralph: x_x!
*SHANK!*SHANK!*
Alley: >_< !!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bob: She did it again! X_X
Jeice: Double claw strike on Alley's face!
Ralph: I said it before and I'll say it again... that kitten's got claws!
X_X
*From behind her, she pulls out her katanas. Chaz jumps up, nails a kick,and follows up with a slash of her katana! As Alley staggers, Chazreturns her swords back to where they were, jumps up and throws a couple ofknives! One of them misses, but the other goes through Alley's thigh! After that, she finishes her attack with the Ultimate Reaper Kick! Alleyfalls down like a stack of dominoes!*
Bob: She hits her finisher!
Jeice: It's all over!
Ref: 1... 2... 3!
*DING! DING! DING!*
Crowd: YAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!
Bob: Chastity Marks has won!
Ralph: Just as I thought! The puppies came out on top!
Bob: You got a one-track mind, Ralph... -_-
*Fuzzy wakes up to see that Chastity has won! Chastity's pet werewolfjumps up to the ring and licks Chastity's face! Mercy picks Chastity up,and the two sisters escape from the ring!*
Mercy: Good show, sis! ^_^
Chaz: Hehe ^_^... X_X! *passes out*
Winner: Chastity Marks
*From the other side of Vegeta’s table, we see none otherthan the legendary Hentai comic, George Carlin! But why is he here???*
George: Come on! I would kill at the aprilfools pay per view! Just give me Spider Jerusalem and I’ll smack him aroundlike a toothless whore!
Vegeta: >=| You sure you’re not just usingthis as a forum to promote your stupid show on HBO?
George: cross my heart and hope to DIE!
Vegeta: e_e...... ok. Go ahead.
*George turns around to leave, but Vegeta has one more thingto say..*
Vegeta: But if I find out you’re using me.. I’mgoing to ass fuck you with a final flash!
George: O_O........
Vegeta: have a good night. >=).......
George: x_x...
*He leaves the office, with his knees buckling!*
Vegeta: e_e.. I hate that guy.....
Kittie vs. Tira Misu
Submissions Match
!!!I FEEL YOURPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIN!!
Jeice: *sits up in his seat* ^_^!!!
Ralph: Yeah!! Kitties!!!!
Bob: you guys are hopeless...
Jeice: and you’re hom--
*As Kittie’s “Pain” blares through the soundsystem, Kittiestorms down to the ring with purpose, sporting her traditional BrazilianJiuJitsu gi!*
Kittie: >=|....
Jeice: Heh! Looks like the Skag is still a littlesalty about what happened in the Interplanetary Title match with Rott andTira..
Ralph: I don’t know why! e_e... It’s not like sheactually LIKES Rott. She’s just a whore! She’ll treat the bum off of a streetthe same way!
Bob: You’re right. she’s just a whore indeed..e_e...
*The newbie catgirl climbs into the ring and begins...stretching... meanwhile, “Naked Girl Falling Down the Stairs” starts up!Former Interplanetary champion Tira Misu hops out from behind the curtain, andruns full speed down the aisle! She gets into the ring and spears Kittie to themat! She grabs her opponents hair and slams her headfirst to the matrepeatidly! Kittie locks her legs around Tira’s chest all the while taking thepunishment!*
Ralph: H_H!!! YEAH!!
Jeice: ^_^!! This is what I came to see tonight!!
Bob: ~_~!!!
*She grabs Tira’s arm, and locks on the Guillotine chokefrom the guard position, immediately choking all of the air out of the formerchamp’s body!*
Tira: X_X!!!
*Before fading out completely, she gathers all of her
Tira: X_______X..............
*As her final moments of consciousness pass by, she triesone last desperate move.. BITING Kittie’s arm like a rabid pitbull!*
Kittie: YEEEEEEEEOUUUCH!!!!
*Miraculously, it works! Kittie lets go of the hold, andstands up! This is Tira’s perfect opportunity to KICK the catgirl in hernutsa.... O_o crotch area! Of course the newbie doubles over, and is kicked inthe forehead! As she goes down, Tira gasps violently for air while rubbing hersore throat!*
Tira: ... >_< .. .....H_H!!!!
*Then.. she gets THAT look in her eye...*
Bob: oh no...
Jeice: H_H I think we’re gonna see some lesbianaction in a few moments!
Ralph: I hope!
*She grabs Kittie’s sore crotch, and delivers a crotchhandle slam for good measure. Then, she reaches into her lingerie and pulls outthe Ten Inch Black, real life mold Dildo! She twirls it through the air likeshe’s the Big Bossman!*
!!WHAM!!
*Dildo smack to the stomach!*
!!WHAM!!
*Dildo Smack to the back of the knee!*
!!BLAOW!!
*Dildo smack to the forehead!!*
Kittie: @_@...
*Tira leaps to the top rope, and flies off, nailing thecatgirl in the forehead with a super dildo smack! This time the ten-incherbends, making an “L” shape!*
Ralph and Jeice: LOLLLOL!!
Bob: This is so disgusting!
*As Kittie climbs to her knees, Tira stands above her withher! Her Dildo is ready to strike one more time! But suddenly, She’s put on herback with a double leg takedown! She quickly gets into her mount position, andforearms the HELL out of Tira!*
Tira: X_x!! H_H!!!
*Tira responds the only way she can..... by FRENCH KISSINGKittie! That’s right, full on tongue wrestling, spit swapping action whetherthe catgirl likes it or not!*
Kittie: X_X!!
Bob: O_O!! MY GOD!!
Jeice: O_O!
Ralph: H_H!! Where’s my jacket?! I need to put itover my lap!! H_H!!!
Jeice: >=|! Oh Hell no! No wanking up here!
*Kittie is rolled over on her back! Tira locks her armsabove her with one hand, fondles her breast with the other, while grinding herhips into hers!*
Everymale in the building! (Except Bob): H_H!!!
Ralph: *NOSEBLEEDS* !!!!!!!!!!
Jeice: o_o...
Bob: What does this have to do with submission?!!?
Jeice: uhh.. maybe she can screw Kittie intogiving up???
*She reaches behind her and pulls out a small rope! Shesuddenly snaps it around Kittie’s neck, going for a chokeout! The gothiccatgirl's eyes BUG from her head as she’s now the one being deprived of all heroxygen!*
Kittie: >_< !!!
*But Tira doesn’t let Kittie pass out just yet.. e_e Whatwould be the fun in that? After all, she is a Sadist as well as a Masochist, soshe lets go of the choke hold, and stands up... allowing her prey to beginstanding. That’s when she reveals the Cat-o-Nine Tails!*
Tira: >=)!!!
!!CRACK!!
Kittie: X_X!!!!
*The first whip sends an unimaginable surge of pain throughher body! She tries to crawl away..... Tira licks her lips and smiles deviouslybefore whipping her relentlessly!*
Bob: ~_~ I can’t believe I’m commentating onthis... Kittie’s in a world of hurt thanks to Tira’s Nine Tails whip!
Jeice and Ralph: *watches happily* *^_^*
*As Kittie continues to try to pull herself up... Tira grabsa hold of the Ju-Jitsu Gi and RIPS it right off of her, revealing a lacy blackbra!*
Ralph: <3_<3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jeice: O_O!! They’re bigger than what I previouslythought!
Bob: >=|!
*Then she rips her BOTTOM part off! Now the catgirl iswearing nothing but a bra and panties! The men LOVE it! Kittie sees herfavorite gi ripped to shreds... and SNAPS!*
Kittie: ...HIIIIIIIISSSSS!!!!!!
Tira: O_O!
*Tira raises her arm to strike, but it’s caught! Kittiebrings it down on her shoulder as if she’s trying to dislocate it from it’ssocket! Then, she locks her arms around Tira and gives her the SAMBO arm throw!The ninetails is picked up, and now it’s Tira’s turn to be whipped like agovernment mule!*
Tira: X_X!! H____H!!!
*Unfortunately it has opposite effects on Tira Misu, witheach strike, she becomes more and more aroused and hot until she’s on the vergeof orgasm!*
Tira: H_H!!! That’s right! Make me yourwhore!!!
Kittie: ... >=|!!
*Kittie becomes so blind with rage, that she throws Tirainto the corner, and beats her SENSELESS with her very own crooked dildo!Suddenly... Tira screams out in ecstacy... she... she...*
Tira: *^_^* whew! Thanks!
Kittie: O_O!
Tira: now, it’s YOUR turn! ^_____^!!!
*She kicks Kittie in the chest, sending her to the ground!The Dildo soars through the air, and into her hands! The former champ thenleaps to the top rope in a single bound, and prepares to deliver another dildosmack!*
Bob: Oh God.. not another!!
*Smoehow, Kittie dives onto the top rope! This shakes Tira’sfoundation and sends her CROTCH FIRST on the metal bar!*
Tira: X_X!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Everyone: OOOOOH!!!
Kittie: ... >_< ... >=|!!!!!!!!!!!
*Now that Tira is stradled on the turnbuckle, Kittie makes arunning leap to the top rope! She grabs Tira’s arm, and executes the SUPERflying Armbar from the top!*
!!THOOOOM!!
Jeice, Ralph, Bob: OH SHIT!!!
*Once they land on the ground, Kittie singes in on the holdas far back as she can! Tira, screaming bloody horror has NO option but to tapout! The ref sounds for the bell immediately!*
!!DING DING DING!! DING DING DING!!!
Winner: Kittie
*”Pain” kicks up once again, but inside the ring... KittieKEEPS the hold locked on! Even after repeated sounds of the bell, she does notrelenquish the hold! The ref tries to PHYSICALLY remove her.. which is a badidea!*
Kittie: HISS!!! >=|!!!
Ref: O_O!! *falls on his ass!*
*The ref calls down, and several other officials come downthe aisle!*
Jeice: holy shit.. this bitch has gone insane!
Ralph: Not insane enough! Rip her shirt offKittie!! DO IT DO IT!!
Bob: RALPH!! >=|
*The ref in charge of the match gets into Kittie’s face andyells out his FINAL warning! She responds by SPITTING in his face! Andinflicting more and more torque into the hold!*
Ref: >=|!!!!!
*Kittie FINALLY lets go of the hold, but it’s too late, theref has already whispered something into the ears of the announcer..*
Announcer: o_o.. The referee has just informedme... since Kittie did not release the hold as instructed.. he has NO choice,but to REVERSE the Decision!!
Jeice, Bob, and Ralph: WHAT?!!?
Announcer: Therefore, the Winner of thismatch... TIRA MISU!!
Winner: Tira Misu X_X!
Kittie: .........o_o....... *twitches*>=|!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jeice: he shouldn’t havedone thaaaaaaaaaat........ oooh he shouldn’t have done that... HE SHOULD NOTHAVE DONE THAT!! X_x!!
*Kittie kicks the asses of EVERY ref in the ring, then snapsthe armbar back on Tira Misu! This time, she adds in so much torque... Tira’shumerous SNAPS like a damn twig!!*
Bob: *ALMOST PUKES*
Ralph: O_O!!! SICK!!
Jeice: MY GOD!!!
Tira: ADLKFAJSDLFKJALK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!;_;!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*She lets go after realizing what she just did!*
Kittie: o_o...e_e...
*She leaves the ring and makes it to the back before severalEMTs rush in to help Tira!*
Jeice: WOW... x_x
Bob: x_X....
Jeice: X_X.... dangerous puppies...
*Meanwhile, Chastity is back to her senses in the back! Shecelebrates, giving herself a nice hot shower... H_H... anyway... As she walksout.. she notices the door to her locker room is open..*
Chastity: O_o... Mercy?
*Suddenly, a hot little blonde appears behind her!*
Girl: >=|! Chaz, we need to talk! >=|
*Chastity turns around and sees who it is!*
Chastity: O_O!!! YOU!!
Girl: >=)! Yes.. ME!
*She pulls out a stake! It’s UPN’s hit action superstars,Sarah Michelle Gellar! And it looks like she’s taking her character intoreality!*
Sarah: e_e!!!
*She lunges towards Chaz, who blocks her arms with her ownhands!*
Chaz: X_x!! Couldn’t we do something else...like share notes or something?!!? X_X We’re both Thespia--
!!BLAOW!!
*She’s knocked on her ass with a Shotokhan Karate style kickby Sarah! The would be “Buffy: The Vampire Slayer” flips 18 times in the air,before coming down on top of her with the stake!! Chaz blocks, and counters,sending the actress THROUGH a wall!*
Jeice: O_O!! YES!
Ralph: O_O!! Rip her shirt off!!
Bob: ...
*Sarah’s had enough! She gets up and leaves as quickily asshe came!*
Chaz: >_< .. what was her problem?!!?O_O....
Ethan Rice vs. WilliamClarke
UCTF DustmasterChampionship
Jeice: Tonight Ethan Rice will fight WilliamClarke for the Dustmaster Title.
Ralph: And if he's lucky get his second career wintonight.
Bob: I'll have you guys know that Ethan proved tobe a semi decent fighter his last match against Andre Tau.
Jeice: Yeah, right Bob Ethan just showed us howhaving an asshole manager can really help.
Ralph: And what's worse is Ethan had flat outattacked Will when his back was turned.
Bob: Good point Ethan stands little chance tonight,against a severely pissed off William.
Jeice: Little chance?! The stupid twat doesn'thave a prayer!
* Clint Eastwood blares out of the system as Ethan Ricecomes down by himself. *
Jeice: Hey, where's that douche bag Slackmoser?
Bob: In accordance to the fight agreement if Ethandoesn't come down with any of his cronies William can't bring his auto shopbuddies.
Ralph: LOL! I heard about that.
* Ethan walks down the ramp as people boo him and throwitems at him. Ethan continues his badboy image as he shows he doesn't care as he rolls under the ropes into thering. *
Ethan: e_e
Bob: Right now Ethan's feeling pretty lonely out therewithout anyone else to help him.
Ralph: Well yeah, it's either that or receive a possiblebullet in the brain.
* "Bombs Over Baghdad" plays as William Clarkecomes from behind the curtain, heappears to of recovered nicely as he loosens up his neck and looks down atEthan with the most fear inducing look a man can ever give. *
William: >:-|
Ethan: ...
* Ehtan tries to maintain that hard look as he stretches onthe ropes, but William runs down the ramp, slides into the ring, and glares atEthan. *
William: I heard what you said.
Ethan: What did I say?
William: Don't play innocent dick milk. I KNOWwhat you said.
Ehtan: But I didn't say anything!
William: >:-|
*DING!*
* And Will already kicks the fight off to a good start witha Lifting Pulling Foot Sweep into a Mounted Position Punch.
Bob: Uh oh. Ethan is going for his Dice Bag.
Ralph: Oh only you would notice if Ethan was goingfor his Dice Bag.
Bob: Don't make a homsexual innuendo out of thishe really is going for his Dice Bag.
Ralph: Why are you staring at his Dice Bag?
Bob: Shut up!
Jeice: LOL!
* Ethan then then pulls out a handful of four sided dice andthrows them at William he receives a few cuts to the face and arms. Will let’sgo of Ethan and counter attack with a sweep and then throws a few eight sidersat Will’s position who quickly notices and gets back up before the explosionrings with a well placed Savate Kick. Ethan struggles back as he regains his steps and answers back with adrop kick. William stumbles back andgoes out on to the apron and is then taken to the outside of the ring with abaseball slide. As William gets up Ethanslides under the rope and fetches a chair near the timekeeper’s area.
Bob: A very interesting chair shot by Ethan.
Ralph: *Holds nose in sympathy *
Jeice: It’s gonna take more then a bunchy of weakchair shots.
* Ethan rolls William back in the ring and then slides inhimself he brings William up and then dashes from behind picking up his chairhe dashes into the ropes as he is now running at the dazed William. *
Bob: Ethan gaining some momentum for a chair shot.
*CLONK! *
* William pulls off a jumping right kick into the chair thatsmacks Ethan in the face. Williamquickly goes for a pin. *
1..KICKOUT!
* Ethan quickly kicks out of the pin as he gets back up.William responds with a knee to the gut and with a quick twist of the body theyboth drop as William puts Ethan into a Rear Naked Chokehold.
William: Now then, what did you say about mymamma?
Ethan: *GACK!*COUGH!* I didn’t say anything!o_o
* Quickly Ethan struggles to the rope and grabs as Williamis forced to let go. He gets up as hewaits for Ethan to slothingly get up, Ethan turns back around as he is nailedwith a Front Kick, a side kick, then a roundhouse, and then a ax kick to thenose. In response Ethan does a DropkickWill’s Knees and quickly gets up and gives him an ear clap. *
Will: >_<!!! >:-|
* Ethan gives a hard right punch to Will’s face who quicklycatches his fist and floors Ethan with a Shoulder Wheel and then a Arm Lockwith the intention of making Ethan tap out like the little bitch that he is. *
Will: >:-| SAY IT! SAY IT!
* Ethan waves his head no as braves the pain as he slowlystands back up, he then steps on Will’s foot and with the force no longerapplied he grabs Will and does a Reverse Body Clutch Fall and lifts his leg forthe pin. *
1..2Kickout!
* Will kicks out of the pin as they both get back up.
Ralph: Oooh! Is it the infamous Hackmaster +12?
Bob: It’s to thin to be a sword.
Jeice: It’s a PVC Pipe you twits!
* Will had dodged the swing of the hard pipe but grabs it onthe backswing and kicks Ethan in the stomach to have him let go. Will thenpositions it on Ethan’s back as he knees him in the chest breaking the pipe inhalf. Ethan falls to the ground with aresounding thud and a few yells as Will begins beating the shit out of him withthe two pieces of pipe. *
Will: You wanna call my mother a crackwhore youlittle bitch?! Now I’m going to beat your ass!
* Will then starts pummeling Ethan with the two peices ofpipe as Ethan is struggling to escape from the range of the long pieces.
Ralph: The hell is Ethan doing.
Bob: He appears to be making an example of Will,and showing everyone exactly what he said; that the UCTF is nothing more thenhis RPG.
Jeice: This idiot is nerdier then I thought. =\
* Ethan sets the table up as he puts Will on the table andlightly places a 100 sided dice under the table.
Will: e_e
* Will then gives the turnbuckle pad a hard front kick asEthan loses his balance and is nutted on the turnbuckle.
Bob: >_< Now he is definably grabbing hisdice bag.
Ralph: >_< Yeah.
Jeice: >_< LOL!
* Will gets off the table as he is about to climb theturnbuckle as all of sudden a string off boos are sounded as Will looks to hisright and sees Earl Slackmoser coming out from the crowd with a 2x4 wrapped inbarbwire, Will gets in his stance as Earl climbs in and takes a swing missingthe boy from Brooklyn and is then introduced to the table as Will Judo throwshim through the table and then catches the 100 sided dice explosion.
*BLOAW!*
* 540 Degree Kicks Ethan in the head as he lands onEarl. Will lands on his feet and almoststumbles as he rolls Ethan off of Earl and pins him. *
1...2..3!
* The bell rings and Will rolls off of Ethan as the refhands him his Dustmaster. *
Bob: That kick was great!
Ralph: Did you hear the sound Ethan’s skull made?!
Jeice: No but let’s see it again!
* A Slo-Mo shows Will’s foot smacking Ethan right in theear. *
Jeice: LOL! Classic!
Winner and STILL Dustmaster Champion: WilliamClarke
* William looks down at the assed out Ethan and smirks as hegrabs Earl by the arm, rolls Ethan on his stomach and practically plants Earl’shand on Ethan’s ass. *
Bob: *stifles laugh* Will Clarke is not a man tomess with.
Ralph: Damn right, his gravity defying hat provesit.
Jeice: Yeah... whatever.
*Will then exits the ring as he leaves.
Seifer Almasy vs. Zvi of G
Swordmaster Championship
Bob: Up next we have Zvi of G fighting SeiferAlmasy for the Swordmaster Title.
Ralph: These swordfights are always interestingthere’s usually plenty of blood.
Jeice: Doesn’t help much the Zvi is nothing more then a heathen barbarian.
Ralph: Yeah he’s like freakin’ Conan the Barbarianor some shit like that.
Jeice: Heh... I guess. >:|
* “Bloody Tears” plays as the huge ass heathen Zvi walksdown the ramp the look of no fear in his face as he climbs onto the ring andjust brings one leg over the top rope and steps in the ring.
Ralph: Dam, that’s one big ass sword.
Bob: Yeah, I think it’s going to suck to be Seiferwhen your opponent’s sword is bigger then yourself.
Jeice: Seifer just better hope his gunblade justdoesn’t shatter in half.
* "Here Comes a Challenger" plays as Seifer walkswalks down the ramp he has his gunblade locked in his black case and theSwordmaster Belt in his other hand. Hewalks off the ramp and unlocks the case as he brings it out and puts the belton the grounf. He looks at Zvi who wasalready in the ring. *
Bob: This could be a problem.
Jeice: Of course it’s gonna be a problem Seifercan’t get in the ring with out being on the receiving end of a hard assclaymore swipe.
* Seifer paces left and right as Zvi is just staring down athim more like he was a straw slicing dummy then a human.
Seifer: >_<
Zvi: ...
* That was a bad move, as Seifer more likely hurt himselftrying to punch the all muscle gut of Zvi. The barbarian swings the frozen gunblade at Seifer with one hand like itwas a baseball bat. Seifer is knockedinto a corner as his senses are clouded. Zvi drops the frozen peice of metal as he charges at Seifer and swings,but the gunblade fighter noticed since he was climbing on the turnbuckle justso he can jump over Zvi and grab his now defrosted Gunblade.
Seifer: Oh shit!
* Seifer rolls out of the way as he pulls his gunblade outof Zvi’s side, the barbarian swings hisclaymore on that direction but Seifer quickly pulls the gun blade out anddeflects the huge attack. Sparks fly from the two swords clashing.
Bob: Seifer slowly losing momentum in this match.
Ralph: O_O Look at all the blood!
Jeice: The question is how Seifer is even able tostand.
* The blonde boy rolls out of the way from a ground attackand then a stomp as he gets up and spin slashes Zvi across his exposedchest. Blood splatters across Zvi’schest as he can feel that it didn’t hit a vein but the blood is all overSeifer’s white coat. *
Ralph: That’s gonna be hell to get out.
Jeice: Maybe he can take it to the same drycleaner that Lo took his white tuxedo jacket.
* The two fighters lunge at each other as the two clash,they push against each other trying to knock their opponent off guard.
Ralph: DUDE! He’s changing colors!
Bob: You’re right, he’s turning orange!
Jeice: No he isn’t! He’s turning red, you idiot!
Bob: He’s going berserk!
* Zvi yells as he takes a fast swing at Seifer. Who pullshis gunblade out and now really looks unsure. The gargantuan rushes at him and Seifer evades as runs to the other sideof the ring. Zvi doesn’t care though hejust jumps into the air like he was an eagle he’s soaring up into the air.
Bob: Oh no! Here it comes! Put the kids to bed!
Ralph: Heaven’s Embrace! HEAVEN’S EMBRACE!
Jeice: It’s just like Zangeif no big whoop. =|
* The spinning piledriver lands and now Seifer is locked ina Wishbone position, slowly the audience begins to wince as they can hearSeifer almost about to break right there. But Zvi lets go as he pulls out the Claymore and stabs Seifer right inthe shoulder pinning him down. Thereferee makes a count of 10. And the bell rings the referee puts the belt at Zvi’s feet who is not letting go of Seiferquickly the gun blade fighter decides that giving up is the quickest way out ashe plays dead and Zvi’s berserker rage stops, quickly Zvi falls to his kneesweakened, he pulls the sword out of Seifer’s shoulder and grabs the belt andleaves. *
Bob: And Zvi is actually able to leave the ring onhis own.
Ralph: However Seifer is gonna need an EMT, he’sbleeding way to much.
Jeice: A little salt and whiskey he’ll be as goodas new.
* The Emt’s come to help Seifer out of the ring and thensome people come to clean the ring a little and make a few adjustments. *
Winner and NEW Swordmaster Champion: Zvi of G
*In the back, we see William Clarke, after a successfultitle defense against Ethan Rice! He has confronted Happosai yet again aboutthe certain... “Pheremone Situation” He’s been going through for the lastmonth! He’s at wit’s end!*
William: >=| Listen! I’m tired of this! Mylife’s been a living HELL ever sense I bumped into you! There has to be somewayto get rid of this crap!
Happosai: >=|.
William: Look, I’ll pay DOUBLE whatever youpaid to get this stuff! Come on! Just tell me what to do!
Happosai: I don’t know what you’re talkingabout. e_e...
*He goes back to sweeping, COMPLETELY ignoring William’svery existence! This causes something inside the Dustmaster champion to..SNAP!*
William: GRRRR!!!!!!!!
*A fierce front kick brings the martial arts master to hisface! He then gets a mop stick snapped over his damn head!! William rips thebandana off of the janitor’s head, and ties him up in it!*
William: @_@!!! HEHE.. YOU’RE GONNA TELL METONIGHT.. @_@!!! HEHEHEHEHE!!!! OR ELSE!!!
*With the Koed Janitor in his possession, William sneaks offinto the boiler room!*
Jeice: O_O.. what is thatkid gonna do....?
Raven Darc vs Triple S
I Quit Match -Intergalactic Title
Ralph: Oh man... something tells me this match isgoing to get ugly, FAST.
Bob: So much is riding on the line here!
Jeice: But if her doesn't... I think we can saythat Raven's got himself a new ass to tap!
*"Papercut" comes over the speakers first gettinga VERY loud pop from the fans! Shawncomes out from behind the curtain, carrying a damn BAT with him as he stompsdown to the ring with a purpose!*
Bob: Man... Shawn's REALLY focused!
Ralph: Well, wouldn't you be if your chick wasbeing held by some asshole for two weeks! Man, Shawn's got to be the most
Jeice: o_o... >=|
*Shawn tosses the bat over the top rope, and rolls in!
Shawn: >=|!
*Shawn drops his leather jacket to the mat as Raven comesout from behind the curtain... alone! But, he stops at the top of the ramp, and waits with crossed arms!*
Raven: >=)
Shawn: >=|... o_o.....
*Shawn's ENTIRE body nearly goes limp, as out from behindthe curtain comes Naomi Armitage, and dragging along with her is a gagged andbound Ran Hibiki! She hands Ran over toRaven, kisses him, then goes RIGHT back behind the curtain as Raven makes hisway down to the ring!*
Bob: And it looks likeShawn's gonna have a little... ah... "motivation" to win this match!
*Raven practically DRAGS Ran down to the ring!
Ralph: Now, that's justcruel!
*Shawn's seen enough! He immedietly runs up the damn turnbuckle, and vaults off it!
*DING, DING, DING!!!*
Bob: And here we go!!!
*Raven is knocked back against the guardrail!
!!!!!BLAOWBLAOWBLAOWBLAOWBLAOOOOWW!!!!!
Raven: x_X
Shawn: >=|...
*Shawn suddenly turns away from Raven, and goes right overto Ran! He's fighting with thehandcuffs, trying to free her!*
Jeice: Heh... poor wankershould try patting down Raven for the key first!
*Shawn's desperately trying to free her, but he's suddenlygrabbed from behind by Raven! Ravenhoists Shawn RIGHT over his head, then tosses him over the top rope, and intothe ring! Raven slides in, but Shawn isRIGHT up to his feet! He DRILLS Raven inthe side with a kick, then charges forward with an elbow right to the demon'sgut! Raven staggers back a step, butthen gets CRACKED in the chin with a backflip kick by Shawn, then rammed intothe corner by a spear from Shawn!*
Bob: Shawn's really on his game tonight!
Ralph: Yeah you-
*Jeice then SLAPS him in the mouf!*
Jeice: We KNOW he's pissed about Ran, dammit!
Ralph: >_o right.
*Back in the ring, Shawn's got Raven pinned in thecorner! Shawn climbs the turnbuckle, andstarts punching Raven repeatedly in the head!*
Crowd: 1! 2! 3! 4! 5! 6! 7!
*Suddenly, right before the tenth punch, Raven GRABS Shawn,and chucks him halfway across the ring!
Crowd: >_< !!! 10!!!
Jeice: LOL!!!
*Raven cricks his neck then tosses off his trenchcoat,sending his demon wings expaning from one rope to the other!*
Ralph: Oh shit... so much for Shawn's offense now!
*Raven sticks out his arm, and several chains shoot out,wrapping themselves around Shawn's body! Shawn struggles as he's pulled towards Raven!
Shawn: HEYAAAHH!!!
!!BLAAMMBLAAMMBLAMMM!!!
Crowd: OOOOOHHHH!!!!!
*Shawn SMACKS Raven in the face with three consecutive,point blank Venom Strikes!! The demongoes DOWN to the mat, holding his face!*
Ralph: DAMN!
Jeice: Hey, isn't that NNNN's move!?
*Shawn motions to the ref, who's holding a mic!
Shawn: WELL!? YOU HAD ENOUGH YOU SON OF A BITCH!? >=|
*He's practically STUFFING the mic down Raven's throat!*
Shawn: SAY it muthaphucka!!
Raven: X_x... Yeah, right.
*BLAOOOWWW!!*
Crowd: OOOH!!!!
*Raven DRILLS Shawn in the gut with a punch!
Shawn: >_____< !!!!
*Raven pulls his boot out of the small of Shawn's back,leaving him writhing on the mat! Ravenrubs his face and chin for a moment, then pulls Shawn away from the ropes byone leg! He then hoists up Shawn highover his head, gets a running start, then tosses him over the top rope!!*
!!!!SMACCCCKKKK!!!!!
Crowd: OOOOOOOOOHHHHHH!!!!
*Shawn goes OVER the ropes, OVER the guardrail, and landswith a resounding smack right on the concrete floor among the fans!
Bob: Okay... this has officially become amis-match!
Ralph: My GOD! Did you hear that smack!?
Jeice: If you didn't... LET'S SEE THAT AGAIN!!!
*The cameras split the shot into two, with a replay of thekick from another angle! Hell, whenShawn hits the guardrail, the camera even does The Matrix as he flips over!*
Jeice: LMAO! That NEVER gets old... x_x
*Raven slowly takes his time walking back through the crowdtowards Shawn! Hell, he's beingdownright cocky with how much timehe's taking! He gets to the guardrail,and leans over Shawn with a smirk!*
Raven: >=)
Shawn: X_X.... >=|!!
*Using what little stamina he has left, Shawn manages to popup off the floor, grab Raven around the head, and brings him down neck-first onthe guardrail! Raven practically VAULTSbackwards and flops down on the floor! Shawn stays leaning over the guardrail, exhausted, as Raven is down onthe floor gagging, and trying to get himself back together!
Bob: Both men are out here!!
Ralph: No ten count for them... one of 'em hasgotta say "I quit" to end this match!
*Shawn starts to get up, just as Raven does so himself!
!!!!BLLLOOOOAAAOOOOWWW!!!!!!
Crowd: >_< !!!
Bob: MY GOD!!! Did you HEAR that slam!!?
Ralph: >_< !!!!
*Shawn is down and OUT on the mat!!
Raven: >=) Quit yet?
Shawn: *coughs* x_x
Raven: Now that's a damned shame...
*Raven then starts flying upwards towards the ceiling!
Bob: What's he doing!?
*Black clouds start to form above the ring, and start tocrackle with electricity!*
Ralph: Oh GOD no!!
Jeice: I this has just degenerated into a"Last man BREATHING" match!!
*The cloud gets larger and larger!
Raven: BEEN NICE KNOWING YOU, SHAWN!!!
*Down in the ring, Shawn is BARELY conscious, unable tomove, but can see what's happening!*
Shawn: x_x no....
!!!!HHHAAAAAAA!!!!
!!!!!!!!!BLOOOOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!!!
*All of the sudden, a HUGE ki blast slams right into Raven'sback! As he's hit, the large black clouddissapates! Raven turns around to seewho it is...*
Raven: >=|... O_O!!!
*the firer of the ki blast jets forward, and buries a kneeright into Raven's gut! His momentumcauses the two to STREAK down to the ring, and slam right into the mat!!
!!!BLAAAOOOOWWW!!!
Bob: HOLY God!! Who is that!?
Ralph: Hold on... O_O!!
Jeice: SHIT!!!
Everyone: *SPIT TAKE*
*As the dust settles, EVERYONE sees who it is who's justtaken out Raven! The man who saw himfirst is the one who he heads over to first!*
Shawn: *coughs* You're supposed to be dead...x_x
Ryokun: I know... miss me?
Crowd: *HUGE ASS POP*
Ralph: HOLY SHIT!!!
Bob: WHAT!?
Jeice: THAT WANKER'S SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD!!!
*EVERYONE is in shock as Ryo helps Shawn up off the mat
Tsuzuki: Going somewhere?
Armitage: Huh!?
*The guy yanks out a peice of paper inscribed with prayerletters, and smacks it right onto Armitage's forehead!
Ryo: *from the ring*
Tsuzuki: Tch... whatever....
*back in the ring, Raven starts to stir!
Raven: o_o... =|... >=)
*all of the sudden, Raven starts LAUGHING!
Raven: WELL, Well, well!!
*Raven spreads his wings, and takes to the air*
Raven: But I know when I'm outnumbered, andunlike you Shawn, I when to quit. I'lllet you have this one, Shawn... but don't think this is the end!
*With that, Raven takes off into the air!
Ref: uhh... o_o... ring the bell!
*DING, DING, DING!!!*
Crowd: *HUGE POP*
Bob: I don't believe it!!
Jeice: And that bloody Ryokun is back from thedead!!
Ralph: A LOT of unanswered questions here tonight!
*Shawn slumps against the ropes, smiling!
Crowd: AWWWWW!!!
*Ryo slides into the ring, with Shawn's IG belt!
WINNER: Uhh... SSS?
*In the bowels of the UCTF Complex.. we see Happosai comingto... He looks at his surroundings and finds himself encaged in a steel trapthe side to fit a small puppy! On the other side of the cage is William, with aderanged smile on his face!*
William: >=).... Welcome back to the land ofthe living... e_e for the time being...
Happosai: O_O!! You’re crazy!!
William: >=|... damn right I’m crazy..e_e........
*He pulls out of his bag, a large vask of orange juice, ahamburger from mcdonalds, and a phone book.*
William: >=| Now.. let’s have a little talk.So Tell Me. How do I get this stuff off?
Happosai: >_< I Don’t kn--
!!WHAM!!
*He slams Happosai’s fingers with the phone book! He takesout a small cup, and poors Orange Juice into it..*
William: e_e I have enough food here to last afew days... >=| I have time Happosai. I have A LOT of time.
Happosai: o_o..
William: Let’s try again. >=| HOW DO I GETTHIS CRAP OFF OF ME?!
Happosai: I already said.. I don’t know!
William: e_e. Very well.
*He reaches into a small pocket in his bag, and pulls out apair of undergarments!*
William: in my hand, I have a pair of boxersworn by a nice, young, energetic, atheletic, tight bodied person. Talk, andI’ll think about giving them to you.
Happosai: O_O! Give them to me first, then I’llthink about it!
*William contemplates....*
William: ...... ok.
*He tosses Happy the clothes, and he immediately startshugging it!*
William: Now?
Happosai: NOPE! >=)!! Sucker!!
William: heh.. who’s the sucker?
Happosai: ??
William: Those boxers are mine.
Happosai: X________X!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*He tosses the boxers out of the cage and hacks away likehe’s about to puke! All the while, William laughs like his name is TedDibiase!*
Happosai: X_X! Laugh all you want!! I have afeeling you won’t be laughing in a few seconds!! >=|!!
William: oh? And why is that? >=|
Happosai: X_X.. *COUGHS* because you idiot...The smell of those sweaty boxers just went through the main venting system...>=)..
William: ...... oh no..
Happosai: That’s right! In a few seconds...
!!BLAM BLAM BLAM!!
*William hears several fists slamming into the basementdoor, then the sound of giggling girls!!*
William: O_O!! AHHHHHHHHH!!!
*The bust through! William rams through the concrete walland takes off with about 3,000 girls following close behind!!!*
Jeice, Bob, and Ralph andthe entire crowd: LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*Meanwhile, in his office, Vegeta watches the eventsunfold..*
Vegeta: hmmm... e_e..... interesting.....
Lo Ruhamah vs. Jann Lee
WORLD TITLE GLASS CAGEMATCH
Bob: Andnow it's time for one match that's bound to be a doozy!
Ralph: O_oWhy? What's up next?
Jeice: *points to the ring* You tell me, pudgy.
*And the ring crew starts lowering the huge steel cagearound the squared circle! As they start riveting it into place, others beginto slap on the glass protrusions and pieces to line the ENTIRE structure! Evenjust looking at the thing right now is making people go.. *
Fans: >_<
Bob: That'sright! Lo-Ruhamah facing Jann Lee for the World Title!
Ralph: X_XWhy are they going to fight each other in that thing?! It's filled with glassfrom head to toe!
Jeice: Cause these two got a score to settle! Heh, my guess is that cage'll beone painful way to end a feud!
*Just then, "Have Mercy on Me" begins to play andLo-Ruhamah strides out from behind the curtain! The fans give him a decentwelcome, but he doesn't seem to notice! He looks raring to go though, hoppinginto the ring through the open door and heading into the corner to pray!*
Bob: There's the holy warrior and one-half of Lo-Down, Lo-Ruhamah!
Jeice: Thisguy hasn't had much luck with Jann Lee in the past. I don't know if he can wineven if there is a belt on the line!
Ralph: Dude, I'm not so sure that winning's all that Lo's got in mind!
Jeice: O_oWhat'd you mean, pudgy?
Ralph: Ithink he just wants to do as much damage as possible!
*Then, "Natural High" kicks into the sound systemand the fans give a big pop to Jann Lee! The World Champ strides down toringside, belt slung over his shoulder and a look of utter determination on hisface! As he gets down to the apron he hands over the title, leaps into thecage, and starts to do some fancy footwork!*
Ralph: Man,this guy may have won from the Thing, but I bet this match'll make that onelook like a love fest.
Jeice: I'mgonna agree with you for once on that. No matter who wins they'll both probablybe dragged outta here on a stretcher.
Bob: And itlooks like they're about to start!
*The ref closes the door and signals for the bell!*
*Ding!*
*And Jann Lee explodes towards Lo like a horse outta thestarting gate! The holy fighter's left without the initiative as Jann leaps up,extends his leg, and...*
Jann: WAAAAAAAAHHHH!
!!BLAAAAOW!!
*DRAGON KICK! Lo's sent FLYING backwards and crashes intothe cage wall with horrendous momentum! The damn thing shakes and several piecesof glass fall from the ceiling and onto the mat! Jann does some more fancyfootwork... and then stops, seeing that Lo's not moving!!!*
Jann: O_o!
Bob: O_OUh... could that be it?! Could Lo have been defeated by ONE Dragon Kick?!
Ralph: LOL!It better! I heard the next match has got some chicas in it!
Jeice: >=| It better not be! I said that this one's going to be pain filledand they better make it pain filled!
*After a little bit, Jann cautiously advances on the pronefigure of Lo... The holy fighter stilldoesn't appear to be moving! Jann gets a little closer, then toes Lo'sshoulder... No movement! Blinking, the JKD master steps up a little more, toesLo's shoulder again and...*
Lo: X_X... >=)! *grabs his foot!*
Jann: O_O!
Bob: Lo wasplaying possum! He's not down and out yet!
Ralph: Damnit!
Jeice: Herecomes the pain!!
!!BLAAAAAAAOW!!
*Holy Punch to Jann's groin!!!!! The World Champ goes limpfrom the move and Lo proceeds to take advantage! He grabs Jann around theshoulders and shoves him face first into the glass-filled cage wall!!*
Fans: >_<!!!
*And then, still grasping his opponent's shoulders, Lo thenbegins to DRAG Jann's face across the wall! The JKD fighter cries out in agonyas he gets multiple cuts and abrasions, blood leaking down his chin anddripping to the floor! Lo finally pulls the stricken Jann away from the glass,spinning him around! Jann tries to bring his defenses up but the blood from hisforehead is starting to get into his eyes and he can't see Lo powering up hisfist!*
!!WHAM!!
Ralph: LOL!He BITCH slapped him!
Bob: ChiSlap from Ruhamah! It looks like he's in control of this fight!
Jeice: Doubt it's over yet, Bobby!
*Sure enough, as Lo's standing triumphant over the fallenJann, the champ regains his composure! Locking his teeth grimly, Jann suddenlylunges out with a well-placed sweep, knocking Lo on his ass! Both of them hopup at almost exactly the same time, but Jann proves to be the faster as he laysin a fierce backhand to Lo's nose!*
Jann: WAAAH!
*And another backhand!*
Jann: WAAAH!
*And ANOTHER backhand!*
Jann: WAAAH!
*And finally, Dragon Punch!*
!!BLAOW!!
*Lo's again sent back first into one of the glass filledcage walls! And this time he lets out a cry of pain! But Jann sure as HELLain't finished yet! As Lo gingerly extricates himself from the wall, Jann'srushing in, spinning on his axis, and delivering one devastating Dragon Spikespinning kick to his stomach! The impact smashes him against the wall again andthis time the glass spikes are dug into his damn skin! He's bleeding too! Jannthen steps up, grinning and...*
!!BLAOWBLAOWBLAOWBLAOWBLAOW!!
*Multiple palm strikes to Lo's chest! The glass shards getdug in even deeper now! But Jann's still not finished, cause he grabs Lo by theforehead and drags him along the wall in the same manner that got used on him!*
Fans: X_X
Jeice: Damn! Look at all that blood!
Ralph: X_XThis is insane!
Bob: Jannwith the comeback! But can he hold onto it? Lo's proven tougher than peoplehave thought already!
*As Lo hits the mat with a harsh thud, Jann takes to the airfor the big stomp! But as he comes down, the holy fighter rolls out of the wayand all Jann hits is the mat! Jann turns around to face the new threat, but allhe does is run RIGHT into a Rosary Kick courtesy of Lo! The attack sends thechamp spiraling upwards before smashing painfully into the wall, causing moreglass to fall from the ceiling! Lo takes the opportunity to grab Jann by thearm and whip him at full speed towards the other end of the ring!*
Ralph:
*Not quite, Ralph! Jann regains his composure at the midwaypoint, finds a spot on the wall, and suddenly leaps forward! As he does so hesmacks his foot against a part of the cage without any glass and twists hismomentum into a backflip! He's saved himself from the glass! Unfortunately hehasn't saved himself from the twin beams of holy fire that strike him in thegut during the apex of his ascent!*
!!BLAOW!!
Bob: Armageddon Glare from Lo! That sure caught Jann by surprise!
Jeice: Ithink it's safe to say that Lo's back in control right now!
Ralph: Well, as long as they stay away from the walls, I'm fine.
*At this point, Lo decides the best thing to do is grindJann's face into an area of the mat containing fallen glass from the ceiling!*
Ralph:
*Lo hauls Jann to his feet... which, nine times out of ten,is a very bad move! Jann proceeds to stab upwards with a large piece of glassand gives Lo the big SHANK! The holy fighter stumbles back, bleeding like astuck... well, a stuck fighter! Jann yells out and leaps into the air!*
Jann: WATAAAAH!!
!!BLAAAAAAOW!!
Bob: DragonFlare! Dragon Flare!
Ralph: X_XThat's it! It's OVER!
Jeice: Man.. that was unexpected!
*Jann makes the cover on Lo! The ref sees this and starts tocount from the outside! Heh.. you think he wants to be in there?!*
Ref: 1..2..
*KICKOUT! Lo kicks out!! Jann blinks in disbelief and then proceedsto make the same mistake Lo did a moment ago... which is haul his opponent tohis feet! Lo's fists explode with sacred power and..*
!!WHAMWHAM!!
Bob: DoubleHoly Punch to Jann's gut! Lo ISN'T finished yet!
Jeice: Things are starting to pick up!
Ralph: x_X!
*The impact of the hits send Jann staggering backwards,giving Lo time to stand up properly! Both fighters sag, almost falling downwhere they stand! It's clear that they're both beaten, bloodied, and seriouslybruised.. but then, as they catch each other's eyes... they start to runforward in a mad dash!*
Jeice: Thisis it! They're going to end it right here!
Ralph: >_< I can't watch!
Bob: I gota feeling I know what they're going to do now!
Jann: WAAAAH!
Lo: HYAAAAH!!
*Lo leaps into the air for a Rosary Kick! Jann slides easilyinto his flying Dragon Kick stance! Time enters slow motion mode as they closein on each other in midair! They get closer, closer, closer....*
!!BLAAAAAAOW!!
Ralph: X_X
Jeice: Oh,SHIT!
Bob: What amove! Lo got damn lucky there!
*That's right! It's Lo still standing after that exchange ofpower kicks! Jann's on the ground, writhing in pain! Lo tiredly falls over hisopponent for the cover and the ref slides down for the count!*
Ref: 1..2..3!!
*Ding!*
Bob: AMAZING! New World Champion!
Jeice: Man,was I right or was I right? Pain filled match!
Ralph: x_x... someone clean up that mat now!
*As the EMTs come down to attend their wounds, the ref helpsthe quivering Lo up and hands over the belt! The fans pop as "Have Mercyon Me" starts up once again!*
Winner and NEW World Champion: Lo-Ruhamah
Jeice: Well, while we’re in between this match, Iwanted to show you guys something. >=|
*Jeice lifts up a HUGE box and puts it on the commentator’stable.*
Jeice: >=|!
Ralph: O_o!
Bob: Jeice, what IS that?
Jeice: It’s Pepsi Twist! Pepsi with fucking LEMON.Now guys.. You thought Crystal Pepsi was bad?! I was unfortunate enough toTASTE this shit. >=| YES. SHIT. It was so bad, I HAD to bring it down hereand let you two taste it!
*He pulls a couple of bottles from the box, gives one toRalph, and one to Bob...*
Ralph: No offense... but if you say it’s nasty,Why would I want to taste it???
Bob: The fat man’s right.. o_o..
Jeice: >=|! JUST FUCKING DRINK IT!
*Bob and Ralph twists the caps off in fear of God! Ralphtakes a sip, then immediately dry heaves!! Bob however, tries to prolong it!*
Jeice: boy if you don’t DRINK IT!! >=|!!!
Bob: o_o uhh... I plan to.. but is it supposed tobe... red?!
Jeice: O_o?! Hell no! What’s your problem!?
*Bob’s bottle of soda turns blood red, then bubbles out ofthe bottle and into his hand! Bob BITCHSCREAMS then throws it over his head!*
Bob: AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
Ralph: UGH! He’s tripping out again!
Jeice: >=|! Damnit! Get a hold of yourselfBOBBY BOY >=)!!!
*Once again, Bob jumps out of the damn commentator’s towerand takes off through the crowd! This time, the cameras follow him through thecomplex, and out to the damn parking lot!*
???: BOBBY BOY!!
Bob: O_O!!!
*Bob turns white! He turns around and sees him.. thesilhouette of a HUGE being, complete with a big afro! He’s wearing a trenchcoat, and has a cigarette in his mouth!*
Bob: o_o!!!
*The person walks into the light... it’s PENNYWISE THECLOWN!! What does Bob do? He takes off running of course... TOWARDS the clown!*
Bob: >=|!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pennywise: O_O!!!
!!BLOOOOOOOOM!!
*Bob SPEARS The clown to his ass, then punches away untilhis face is BARE of all paint!*
Ralph: O_O!! IT’S TIM CURRY!!
Jeice: Well DUH.. didn’t you ever see IT??
Ralph: Nope.. o_o...
Jeice: Now this makes sense! Tim’s been fuckingwith Bob’s head because of that stupid Incident last year! The
Ralph: oh yeah!!! IT’s been almost exactly a yeartoday!!
*Bob gives him a kick to the side before standing up!*
Bob: >=|! You SICK SON OF A..... O_O!!
*From the distance, he can see a pair of headlights growinglarger by the second! Before he knows it, he finds himself diving behind a carto avoid...... THE BUS!!!*
Jeice and Ralph: O_O!! THEBUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*It comes to a screeching hault! The door is whipped open!Out walks....*
Scott: >=|!!! We have some unfinishedbusiness!!!
Everyone: *FACEFAULTS!*
Jeice: IT’s Triple H! Imean Scott Williams!! He’s back again!!!
*Scott tosses Tim into the bus, then jumps in!*
Scott: e_e.. and We’ll finish it next week.. atAPRIL FOOLS DAY!! >=|!!!
Bob: X_x.. oh great!
*The bus revs up before taking off into the night!!*
Bob: x_X... oh shit...
*A few minutes later, Bob comes back to the commentator’sbooth to a huge ovation from the crowd! He sits down and begins to look over atRalph..*
Ralph: Oh HELL no! I’m not involved this time! Youbetter call your boyfriend James!!
Bob: ;_;!!!
Nick vs. Euridice Reed
INTERPLANETARY TITLE MATCH
Ralph: So,what's next on the fight list? O_o
Jeice: Afight without puppies, that's what.
Ralph: Ugh!Wake me up when it's over then!
Bob: ~_~Anyway, despite Ralph's lack of enthusiasm, we've got a good match coming up!Nick takes on Reed for the Interplanetary Title!
*Right then, "Believe in Myself" begins and outcomes Nick to a nice little pop from the crowd! The pseudo-saiyan heads downthe ramp, aura already almost glowing around him in preparation for the matchahead! He clambers up the steps and gets into his corner, waiting patiently!*
Jeice: Thislittle kid's proven to be an okay fighter, but I doubt his chances against Reedtonight.
Ralph: O_oWhy's that?
Jeice: Heh,you'll see.
Bob: Ithink what Jeice is trying to say is that even though Nick's talented, hehasn't exactly had a great amount of experience, and that's going to countagainst him tonight.
*Next, "Sweating Bullets" begins and Reed comesout to a nice welcome from the fans! His IP belt held in one hand, his batontwirling in the other, and the NRA belt over his shoulder, Reed's ready foraction as he makes his way to ringside! The vice cop hands over his straps tothe ref as he gets in, eyeing Nick with a little bit of disgust*
Bob: Andhere's current Interplanetary and NRA Champ, Euridice Reed! Fresh off his titlevictory against Tira Misu, can he defend against Nick?
Jeice: LOL!I betcha he's wondering why the hell he's being put up against a runt like thattonight.
Ralph: Aslong as it's a fast match, I really don't care WHAT happens.
*The ref signals for the bell!*
*Ding!*
!!BLAAAAOW!!
Everyone: >_< OOOOOOH!!
Jeice:
*And Nick's staggering backwards, clutching his nose!Grinning, Reed twirls his baton and doesn't even give the kid a chance torecover! He rushes straight in and cracks the side of the weapon against thepseudo-saiyan's forehead!*
!!WHAM!!
*Following up, the Vice cop spins the baton so that he'sgripping one end with both hands, takes a step back, and swings! The shotsmashes into Nick's gut and the kid doubles over! Reed proceeds to ax-handlehis back, sending him into the mat!*
Ralph: Ohman! Reed's got NO mercy tonight!
Bob: That'sright, Ralph! It seems that Nick's not going to get any free offense in thismatch up!
*Reed then haughtily picks up the bruised Nick... who thendonates the cop a little surprise known as the Kame Thrust! To his damn mouth!*
!!BLAOW!!
*Since he didn't get any quarter, Nick decides not to giveany in return so he thrusts his tiny leg out and cracks it against Reed's shin!The cop's leg buckles from the move and he almost busts his ass... but thenNick figures he might as well lend gravity a hand.. Literally, with a seriouslyheart-felt punch to Reed's jaw! Reed falls back like a tree and hits the mat!Nick leaps into the air and soars back down for the heel stomp, but Reed'ssuddenly rolling out of the way! As the kid's feet touch down, Reed swingssideways with his baton and sweeps Nick's legs out from under him!*
Bob: Itlooked like Nick was making a come back there, but that move by Reed is boundto even things up!
Jeice: Toldyou the kid needed more experience.
Ralph: *snoooooze*
Bob: *rollsup a newspaper...THWACK!*
Ralph: X_XOw... Okay, I'm awake! I'm awake!
*Nick hits the mat but manages to kip up just in time toavoid another baton swipe! But if you think that's Reed's only offense, you'dbe dead wrong! The vice cop turns the momentum of his swing into a heftyspinning kick that catches Nick right in the chest! Nick soars backwards intothe ropes, bounces back, and runs straight into a clothesline!*
!!BLAOW!!
*Reed covers!*
Ref: 1..2..
*Shoulder up by Nick! It's not over! Before Reed can eventhink of picking the kid up, Nick's flying upwards and delivering a hellaciousheadbutt between the eyes!!!*
Ralph: LOL!Nice counter attack!
Jeice: Ouchis all I can say to that, heh.
Bob: And Idon't think Nick's done just yet!
*Of course he's not! As Reed staggers back, pawing his head,Nick starts to gather the ki spheres into his palms! And, yelling out the nameas he forms the attack, Nick then leaps into the air for a good angle and..*
Nick: Triken!
!!BOOOM!!
*The energy attack blasts Reed off of his feet and into the corner!Nick soars in and starts to pound away at the Vice cop's gut with the mudholestomping!*
!!WHAMWHAMWHAM!!
Bob: Nickwith the comeback! He's getting the momentum now!
Ralph: *closes his eyes.. but puts on those glasses that makes it look like you'reawake* Zzzz
Jeice: Heh,but I bet he's gonna have it taken away from him right about.. now!
*And as if on cue, Reed regains his composure and brings his elbow down HARD onto Nick'shead! The pseudo-saiyan hits the mat heavily, but then Reed's foot lashes outand punts the kid across the ring! As Nick's getting to his feet dazed, he'stoo out of it to notice that Reed's rushing in until he gets lifted off hisfeet by an uppercut to the chin! And then another ax-handle blow smashes thekid into the mat once more! The Vice cop twirls his baton up, aims, then stabsdownward as hard as he can at Nick's stomach!*
!!BLAOW!!
*But the attack gets nowhere near Nick's gut, cause thepseudo-saiyan's managed to bring a Barrier up to block! While Reed's stillstunned by the miss, Nick scoots underneath his legs, gets behind him, thenbrings his knee up for...*
!!BLAAAOW!!
Ralph: z_z...
Jeice: LOL!Low blow! Low blow!
Bob: >_< Ladies and gentlemen,Reed is DEFINITELY going to feel that in the morning!
*Sure thing, Bobby.. that is, if Reed doesn't feel the painof the spot where Nick just now crashes his heels into the small of his back!The cop falls face first onto the ground! Nick takes to the air, then dropsdown heavily with a splash! He covers and the ref slides down to make thecount!*
Ref: 1...
!!BLAOW!!
Fans: >_< !!
Jeice: LOL!That baton's got some reach!
Bob: Reeddelivers a stunning blow to Nick's forehead! Man, where did THAT come from?
Ralph: Z_Z
*Yep! It appears that while Nick had him on the cover, Reedwas able to keep enough composure to swing his baton up and crack it againstNick's head one more time! Shrugging off the kid, Reed gets to his feet andthen hauls him up! Rearing back, Reed then connects with a Haymaker that spinsthe pseudo-saiyan on his axis... and right into the cop's grip again for..*
!!BLAAAAAOW!!
Bob: Double-arm DDT!
Jeice: That's it! It's OVER!
Ralph: Z_z...o_O It's over?!
*Reed stomps down on Nick's chest and calls the ref over! Heslides down to make the count!*
Ref: 1..2..3!!
*Ding!*
Winner and STILL IP Champ:
Bob: Greateffort by Nick, but Reed emerges as the still Interplanetary Champion!
Jeice: Yeah, that kid needs some experience but he did alright.
Ralph: ^_^Quick, onto the next match!
*In the back, Sue Tellarusso catches a hold of Covetous,who’s walking through the back!*
Sue: Covetous! Covetous!
Covetous: ??? e_e...
Sue: Do you have any comments about your matchlater on?
*Covetous chuckles a bit..*
Covetous: Yeah. I have something to say.Tonight... I settle an old score with Jin Saotome. e_e....
*He walks by, without saying another word*
Sue: ... old score???
Suicide vs. Hyperkat
UCTF Anime Championship
Ladder Match
*”Eye of the Tiger” starts up, kicking up a trailing blazeof pyrotechnics down the ailse into the ring. Of course that can only mean onething.. former Anime Champion and questionable homosexual Hyper Kat makes hisway down the aisle, receiving a nice large pop from the crowd! …more so fromthe men than the ladies for some reason… o_o*
Hyper: >=\
Jeice: He’s an alright fighter I guess… eventhough he’s a fruitcake.
Ralph: LOL X_X.
Bob: well, regardless of Hyper’s sexualpreference, he has waited a very VERY long time to get his revenge againstSuicide!
Jeice: Heh. Yeah.. both of these characters arepretty screwed up. Hyper jumped out of the closet in front of the entire nationon MTV.. and well Suicide… let’s just say He’s in the same boat as RobertDowney Jr!
*Speak of the devil, ”Links 2 3 4” kicks up! As you readerswould expect, he’s getting a great heel response from the crowd! Hyperkat stepsout of the ring and positions himself on the apron, ready to pounce the momentSuicide comes out!*
Hyper: >=|!
!!POP!!
*But unfortunately for the challenger, Suicide pops him frombehind with a chairshot! The Kat turns a full two hundred-seventy degrees fromthe impact, before landing back of the head first on the concrete, drawingmassive heat from the UCTF Arena Crowd!*
Suicide: >=)…
Bob: Suicide came in through the crowd! Thecoward!
Jeice: Heh! That’s right, but it may have gottenthe job done already!
*Suicide steps out onto the apron, with the chair wrappedfirmly under his arm like a football! He leans back before making a running startand diving off of it! Taking a page out of the book of the manical Mick Foley,Suicide almost crushes the poor kitty’s head with an amazing elbow/chair drop!*
Hyper: X_X!
*Hyper is mounted like a horse by the champion, beforefeeling several stiff forearm shots to the side of the face from Suicide!Afterwards, the champion stands up, kicks him in the chest a few more timesbefore SPITTING on him*
Suicide: >=|!
Jeice: holy mother of all that is sane! I’ve neverseen ol Seth this pissed before!
Bob: ~_~.. He didn’t have to spit on him though…
*He lifts his feline opponent by the fur, and stuffs hishead between his legs, prepping him for a powerbomb on the concrete floor!*
Ralph: This doesn’t look good at all…
Jeice: Yeah, but it’s smart wrestling. Suicide’sgonna put Hyper back on the shelf for ANOTHER six months if he nails this move!
*Suicide lifts him for a powerbomb, but instead of throwinghim back down, the champion falls BACKWARDS. Hyper flies face forward, andlands THROAT FIRST on the iron barrier! He flips backwards, landing on hishead!*
Everyone: OOOH!!!! X_X!!!!
Jeice: ho… LOL.. X_X Holyshit!
*Seth looks down at his FUNKED up opponent, just to makesure he’s finished!*
Suicide: >=|….
*Then marches up the aisle where the ominous structureawaits! The FIFTY foot ladder is folded up by the champion, and dragged downthe aisle! Yes.. it’s too heavy to be lifted! The champ struggles down theaisle with the monstrocity, before sliding it all the way in..*
Jeice: Damn, that thing is huge.. if someone comesoff of it…..
Bob: exactly.
Ralph: o_o…
*Once the ladder is in, Suicide jumps out of the ring andsends three HUGE stomps into the lower back of Hyperkat just to make sure hewon’t interfere!*
Hyper: X_X!!
Suicide: >=|!!!!
Ralph: LOL! Man, Suicide is not playing around!
Jeice: I can understand him. e_e. Look, if someonehit me with MY finishing move in front of the world and I had to be carriedout.. I’d want to kill him too!
*The champ is back in the ring, using all of his strength justto stand the ladder back up and unfold it! Once it’s unfolded, the camera showsa shot from the Anime Title looking down at the ring, it looks like height of asmall skyscraper!*
Ralph: X_x… I’m about to get a nose bleed justlooking at the monitor!
Bob: Right.. That ladder goes twice as high as ourcommentator’s booth! It’s amazing!
Jeice: yeah, it’s ok. e_e…
*The champion begins his ascent up the ladder! The crowdbegins to actually chant Hyper’s name, in attempt to give the challenger enoughenergy to get his ass up!*
Crowd: Hyper! Hyper! Hyper! Hyper!
Commentators: *look ateach other* O_o….
Hyper: X_x…. o_o…
*He suddenly jolts up like popeye after a can of spinach anddives into the ring! Suicide however, is 95% of the way to the top of the ladder!*
Jeice: oh yeah.. Thismatch is over already!
Hyper: … >=|!!!
*Out of desperation, Hyper leaps to the top rope in a singlebound, then the 6’7 kittie leaps from the top, and grabs the back of Suicide’scamoflague jeans in an impressive display of mad hops! The champion’s beltcan’t support the weight and snaps apart, bringing the champion’s pants aroundhis ankles ALONG with his boxers!*
Suicide: O_O!!!
Crowd: O_O!!! LOL!!!!
Bob and Ralph: LOL!!
Jeice: X_X! I SEE A BAD MOON RISING!! LOL!!
*Suicide’s so embarrassed, he actually tries to pull hispants up, forgetting he was holding onto ladder! Forty 45 plus feet later, Thechampion crashes back first on the UCTF mat along with Hyperkat beside him, whofalls on his side!*
!!WHOOM!!
Crowd: OOOH!!!!
Bob: Whoa! What a spill!!
Ralph: X_x can I get a mosaic above Suicide’ssolider please?!
Jeice: What scares me is that the ladder barelyeven moved after those two grown ass men were hanging off. >=|
*Hyper’s the first one to show some movement. As he goes tostand back up, Suicide wraps his short legs around the challengers, trippinghim back to the mat! Once he’s down, the Champion quickly pulls his pants backup, then goes for his AWAL submission manuver. Before he can snap it on, Hyperdelivers a low blow to the military Jewels!*
Suicide: >_< !
*Suicide stumbles into the corner after the paralizingballshot! You’d think it was over… nope. >=| Hyper is back to his feet, andhe delivers a running kick to the balls! The force is so strong, Suicide landson the top rope! Before he can do anything else, Hyper finishes off with a EvilNeko Fury, once again directed to Suicide’s BALLS.*
Suicide: X_X!!!
*Too hurt to move, Suicide is helpless whenever thechallenger climbs to the second rope, and superplexes his ass to the mat!Seconds after, the champion rolls out of the ring goes underneath the skirt!The crowd POPS whenever the challnger brings out a forklift full of tables!!*
Hyper: e_e!!!
Jeice: >=)!! YEAH!!
*Suicide begins showing signs of life on the inside, whileHyper sets up EVERY single table from the palates up on the outside! After he’sdone.. he goes back under the skirt... and pulls out ANOTHER forklift filledPalate of Tables!*
Bob: Good God!!
Jeice: This is making my dick hard fellas!
*These tables are slid into the ring!*
Hyper: >=|...
*Suicide stands back to his feet, albeit wobbling around thesquared circle! Hyper walks toward him, and points to the ground*
Hyper: is that your wallet? O_o
Suicide: @_@..
*He looks down, only to get a huge Dusty Rhodes style elbowto the back of the head! He then locks him up, and lifts him for a verticalsuplex, before bringing him face first to the mat!*
Bob: The Flea Collar!
Jeice: Heh. He’s not done. Looks like he’s gonnatry to put Suicide away here, then go for the gold.
Ralph: yeah. e_e They’re gonna have to make surethe other’s in a coma if they’re gonna climb that big thing and grab thebelt...
*While being pulled up to his feet, Suicide lays in a fewpunches to the midsection of Hyper! The challenger however, responds with astiff kick to the face, a stiff kick to the stomach, then a STUNNER! Thechampion bounces off of his knees and lands against the ladder! Hyper grabs thesteel chair that was used before, and batters up!*
Jeice: OH SH--
*He SWINGS! STRIKE! Suicide ducks the chairshot, then kickshis opponent in the stomach! Hyper doubles over and drops the chair right underhim, while Suicide comes off the ropes with extreme velocity and axe kicksHyper ONTO the chair! The champs slow to get up, but once he does, he comes offthe ropes a second time and nails ANOTHER axe kick to the back of the head!This time, Suicide Leaps back to his feet with a second wind, which gets..believe it or not, a mixed response from the crowd!*
Suicide: >=|!!!!
Jeice: Wow! Two leg dropsonto that chair! A few more of those and Hyper’s own mom won’t be able torecognize him tonight!
*Seth leaves the ring, then digs under the skirt as well!*
Bob: Oh NOW what?!
*He rips out a set of LADDERS from underneath the ring!*
Ralph: What?!?! X_X!
Bob: Isn’t the fifty footer enough?!!?!?
Suicide: >=|...........
*He rips apart the rope, then heaves all six ladders overthe top rope and into the ring! Once he’s back in.. he sets up ALL of theladders before grabbing one, and climbing to the top rope... Once above, helooks down on Hyperkat who’s still yet to get up!*
Bob: What’s.. .this...?!
Jeice: ... O_O! It’s the Scott Hall! He’s gonna dothe scott hall!
*That’s right! Using the move that Scott Hall made famous,Suicide RIDES the ladder from the top rope, all the way down onto Hyper’scarcass!*
Bob: X_X!! Good God! Stop the damn match!! Stopit!
Jeice: YES!! O_o Ralph, you ok?
Ralph: =\ no puppies...
*As Suicide starts to climb for the title, he looks back atHyper, who’s buried under the ladder! ...Something inside him snaps!*
Suicide: ......
Bob: oh no... what is hethinking?
*He hops down from the second Rung, and once again climbs tothe top rope!*
Jeice: ... What is hegoing to do here?!
Suicide:>=|!!!
*Then he leaps off, nailing his patented Corkscrew ElbowDrop on top of the ladder which is ONTOP of Hyperkat!*
Crowd: OOOOOOOH!!!
Ralph: OUCH!!
Bob: X_X!! Suicide just sacrificed his body to putHyperkat’s Lights out folks!
Jeice: ... Let’s See that again!
*The camera replays the corkscrew elbow drop ontop of thedamn ladder! Back in realtime, Suicide has pulled his military ass back ontothe ladder, and starts climbing slowly! Hyper pushes the ladder off of him. Nowbleeding from the face, he crawls back to his feet, and climbs right behind theChampion! Suicide sees him coming, and knocks him off of the ladder with aSavate Kick! He lands on his feet, and stumbles around...*
Suicide: ...
*The champ turns around on the ladder, and flies off for abody press! Unfortunately for him, Hyper catches him in midair, and spinebustshis ass Arn Anderson style through the damn table set up in the ring!!*
Crowd: O_O!!!!
All Three: SHIT!!!
*No longer waisting anytime, Hyper begins climbing theladder! The crowd is behind him, urging the challenger to suck it up and gofaster up the inanimate object! Suicide pulls himself from the wreckage, andsees his title slipping away with each passing second! He begins climbing aswell!*
Bob: ..here we go!
*From the opposite side of Hyper Kat is the Anime Champion!As both are almost to the top rung.. it’s apparent that this next exchange mayhave some fatal results!*
Suicide: >=|…
Hyperkat: >=|….
*Being the taller of the two, Hyper makes it to the topfirst! Like the smart (yeah right) kitten that he is, he reaches over the otherside of the ladder and sticks the Anime Champ in the face in attempt to knockhim off of the ladder! But the tough Military brat fights back, eventuallyclimbing to the rung second to the top, along with Hyper!*
Jeice: e_e… something bad is about to happen here…
*Suicide throws a punch which is blocked and responded witha Hyper Punch not once, not twice, but three times! He leans back, half lucid!Hyper draws back to deliver the final blow, and when he does, Suicide ducks,and hoists him into a fireman’s carry position!*
Everyone: O_O!!!!
*You can hear fans saying “OH SHIT” in the background, asSuicide looks around, contemplating whether he should do it or not…*
Bob: Oh God No! Suicide! Don’t do it! Don’t doit!!
Ralph and Jeice: DO IT DO IT!!
Suicide: … >=|!!!
*He does it! Leaping from the fifty foot mark, Suicide nailsHyper Kat with the Courtmartial through a damn table!!*
Both: X_X!!!
Crowd: HO-LY-SHIT-HO-LY-SHIT-HO-LY-SHIT!
Jeice: Yeah.. They’redead! Definitely Dead!!
*Both lie on the outside in what used to be a table.. bothbroken in half! They remain there for the next five minutes without making anymovements! Finally, Hyper Kat is the FIRST to start moving suprisingly!Somehow, he’s able to pull all six feet seven inches of his body into the ring!All alone, he climbs UP!*
Jeice: Wow.. This has been a great match.. Suicidegave it his all, but.. It’s OVER!
Bob: Damn right.. x_x Both bodies fell FIFTY Feetto the outside.. THROUGH a table!
*Seth reaches up and grabs the apron! He pulls himself backinto the ring, and slowly picks up the chair that has been used more than oncein the match already! He falls into the nearby corner, and pulls himself to thetop rope!*
Suicide: >_< ...
Ralph: What is he doing? He can’t make the leapfrom there! Especially in his condition right now!
Jeice: You’re right.. what the hell IS he doing?!
*Hyper makes it to the very top! YES.. He’s STANDING on thevery top Rung, He reaches upwards and actually has the strap of the belt in hishands! That is.. until...*
!!BLAM!!
*Sucide throws the chair, connecting Hyper HARD!!*
Hyper: X_X!!!
*With the mighty chairshot to the back of the head, HyperFLIES of the ladder and falls fifty feet below, crashing through the river oftables! That leaves Suicide in the ring all alone! He walks off of the top ropeonto the top rung of the smallest ladder!*
Suicide: x_X…
Jeice: … I know he’s not going to…
*Yes, Suicide walks across the ladders like they’re a flightof stairs! Once he’s ontop of the next to tallest ladder, it loses balance!Right when it falls to the ground, he leaps valiantly onto the fifty footerlike it’s a horse! Fighting to stay in the air!*
Bob: X_x!
Ralph: o_o!
Jeice: oh shit.. it’s Jeff Hardy all over again!
*Kinda, but Suicide doesn’t screw up the spot like Jeff!>=( Instead, he regains balance, climbs to the top of the ring, and whilestanding on his tip toes grabs a hold of the belt!*
Hyper: X_X
Suicide: X_X!!
*But Seth can’t breathe easy just yet, because Hyperkat’sback in the ring! Using his reverse, he “DECLEATS” the ladder itself, leavingSuicide dangling over fifty feet in the air, hanging on by the hook!*
Everyone: X_X!
*Hyper grabs the hefty fifty foot ladder, heaves it over hishead! It smacks the champ in his wide open chest, loosening the grip to ONEhand!*
Suicide: X_x!!
Hyper: >=)!!
Jeice: … here we go!
*He heaves it up one last time to finish the job, butSuicide KICKS it, sending it crashing back to the canvas! Inertia sends theshock through the ladder and into Hyperkat’s neck like a whip!*
Hyper: X_X!!!!!!
All Three: HOLY SHIT!!
*As Hyper collapses under the ladder, with a possiblecrushed trachea, Suicide snatches the belt from it’s restraints, and fallsfifty plus feet on top of the very ladder that’s on top of Hyper Kat!*
!!DING DING DING!!
*The stunned crowd watches with wide eyes as ”Links 2 3 4”kicks up again. EMTs on hand rush down to help the broken in half Suicide andHyper Kat!*
Winner and Still UCTF Anime Champion: Suicide
*The next few moments pass by, as the ring crew swiftlyremove all ladders and table parts away... A second team follows right behindthem, setting up the surrounding area for the DOME CAGE!*
Jeice: >=)!! Yeah!
Bob: Now this is the match we’ve all been waitingfor! Daniel Hibiki has a chance to prove himself tonight!
Ralph: yeah.. he’ll prove that he’s an idiot! X_X!He’s gotta face the saiyans, Jin Saotome, AND Rott! All for the Grand Title!!
Jeice: AND it will be inside a steel cage.. wherenone of his Pink Tsunami Buddies can help him!
Daniel Hibiki vs. Covetousvs. Hystalin DeWarrloc vs. Jin Saotome vs. Rott
UCTF Grand Championship
Electrified Dome CageBarbed Wire Bomb Match
*First "Power Fighter" kicks up over the UCTFsound system! Coming out to a warm "Welcome Back" reception from theUCTF crowd! The man also known as "Ronin" walks down to the ring witha confident look on his face!*
Jin: =|….
Bob: The Kamikaze killer made his surprise returnlast week at Saturday Massacre!
Jeice: Yeah. This bloke has made more returns tothe ring than I have! It's like the UCTF has a revolving door or something.e_e.
Ralph: stop hating, Jeice.
*He stops midway down the ramp and stops. From behind thecurtains, Eiji Kisaragi and Exeus follow close behind!*
Eiji and Exeus: >=|
Bob: Uh oh! Looks like Jin was making good on hispromijse! He's bringing his buddies from the Badd Company down with him!
Jeice: yeah, well it's not like they can doanything.. these guys are going to be in a dome cage!
*Once he climbs into the ring… "Hells Bells" kicksup! Rott walks out with his manager Kittie, who just went through 18 levels ofHell with Tira Misu earlier in the night! Through the mixed response from thecrowd.. the fans begin chanting….*
Crowd: ROTT'S IN LOVE! ROTT'S IN LOVE! ROTT'SIN LOVE! ROTT'S IN LOVE!
Rott: >=|… *tokes*
Ralph: aww look! I think he's blushing!
Jeice: oh man! My ribs hurt! X_X!
Bob: Hey Jeice, don't YOU have a girlfriend >=)
Jeice: and don't you have a BOYFRIEND?! >=|!!
Bob: >=|…….
*Next, "Symphony of Destruction" kicks up over thesoundsystem! On the big screen, the "Covetron Security Systems INC"logo pops up, as several thousand fliers float into the crowd! Jeice reachesout and catches one*
Jeice: O_o Covetous has become a marketinggenius!
*He holds up the paper with a SD picture of Covetous going"^_^"!*
*The Neo-Saiyan walks out, and he's immediately staring ahole into Jin Soatome's Soul! >=|*
Covetous: >:|
Jin: >:o|
Ralph: whoa! What beef does Covetous have withJin? "Settle an old score" O_o
Jeice: e_e.. I think I remember….
Bob: Then tell us!
Jeice: Hell no. >=| Do your own research!
!!THIS MEANS WAR!!
*That's right. It's jacked up B*tch time! "WarEnsemble" kicks up over the sound system! This brings out the eldest UCTFMember, Hystalin DeWarrloc, who's NEVER won the the "BIG ONE" in theUCTF! Tonight she plans on changing that, but she'll have to get through Threeof her greatest challenges…. And Dan Hibiki too.*
Hystalin: >=|
Bob: if anyone has anything to prove tonight..it's HER!
Jeice: yeah. e_e She's blown many opportunitiesfor this gold, and/or she was outsmarted for the title!
Ralph: like the Ranma Saotome Stable Warsincident?
Jeice: exactly. >=)
*Everyone's in.. except for one person…..*
!ALRIGHT PARTNA… JUST KEEPOOON POSIN.. YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS!
*That's right! "Posin" kicks up, bringing out theUCTF Grand Champion, Dan Hibiki, who's suprisingly coming out…. ALONE! That'sright, no Joe, no Satan, no Hurricane, and not even Johnny Cockring! Thechampion makes a B-Line for the ring, with a determined look on his face!*
Dan: >=|!
Jeice: uhh.. What the hell is going on here??
Ralph: X_X.. I don't know!
Bob: e_e It has to be a setup.. Dan wouldn't justcome down here alone. Did they check beneath the ring?!
*Right whenever Dan walks into the ring, he's PLASTERED witha right hand from Hystalin! He stands up, then gets knocked down by Jin, Thenby Rott, then by Covetous! The bell sounds, and the Dome Cage erects itselffrom the ground, wrapping itself around the fatal fiveway participants!*
!!DING DING DING!!
Bob: Here we go!!
Jeice: >=)
Ralph: O_o but how can we tell the cage isactually electrified??
*Just then, a small fly floats down and lands on the steelcage! 5,000,000 volts of electricity pulsates through it's little exo-skeleton,popping it like a zit!*
Everyone: O_O!!!!!!!!!!
Jeice: >=) There'syour answer!
*Back on the inside.. Dan uses the turnbuckle to pick hisown ass up from the ground..*
Dan: N... Namen Ja Ne DOOOOOOOOH!!!! X_X!!!!
*Hystalin drives a knee into his back, then viciously slamshis face into the turnbuckle repeatidly! She spins him around, and whips himacross the ring, where Jin awaits, nailing a Gale Beast Leg Lariat! As he layson his back, writhing in pain, Covetous comes flying from the TOP of the cage,executing a moonsault! THEN, Rott leaps off of the top rope, driving hisbuffalo knuckle right between Dan’s eyes!*
Jeice: x_X! Damn! Is thisa match or a gang beating! It makes no bloody sense!!
*Dan somehow rolls over to his knees to stand back up..that’s when we see that his cranium is cracked wide open!*
Dan: x_x… oyaji…
*Pink Tsunami has already seen enough!! Higashi, Helms, andMr. Satan himself sprint down to the electrified cage with pliers and othertools in their hands in attempt to save their friend, and leader Dan from thebeating he’s receiving inside the ring! Unfortunately for them, they’re stoppedby Eiji and Exeus in the aisle!!*
Jeice, Bob, Ralph: O_O!!
*Eiji and Joe beat the living hell out of each other, andExeus takes on Helms and Mr. Satan all by himself! The
Jeice: Damn! So much for the help Dan! You’re inthere alone!
Bob: Which can’t be good! Dan’s ass is gonna tryto cash the check his mouth wrote for him!
Ralph: heh.. I don’t think there’s enough money inthe bank.. e_e...
*Covetron military presses Dan over his head, and brings thepoor bastard neck first onto the third rope of pure barbed wire! The champ’sliterally stuck to the top rope! Hystalin and Covetous grab onto the the wireand begin bouncing the Saikyo master up and down until he’s ripped from thespiked object, and out of his Gi Vest!*
!!THOMP!!
*Dan rolls all the way back to his feet, and right intoRott’s Armada Heel kick! His ENTIRE body turns a full 180 degrees, and he’scaught by Jin Saotome!*
Jin: >=)...
*Jin executes a powerful belly to belly suplex! Dan flipsTWICE before landing in a straddled position on the top turnbuckle! Jin climbsthe barbed wire, and grabs the Grand Champion around his waist....*
Jeice: someone’s about tobe in a world of hurt in a few moments!
*He throws him back into a Super German Release Suplex! Danhits neck first, tehn flips over onto his stomach!*
Bob: UGH!!!
Ralph: They’re gonna KILL him!!
*If it’s not enough already.. Covetous hits him with aflying suplex! Then Hystalin picks him up one more time, and executes.........*
!!BLOOOM!!
Dan: X_X!!!
*THE SUPLEX OF DOOM!!!! After eliminating Daniel.. Hystalincovers him and hooks the leg! The ref slides down and makes the count!*
Ref: 1........2.....
*But Rott pulls Hystalin off! She jumps up and gets inRott’s face! Without warning, he punches Hystalin in the jaw, then quickilycovers Dan!*
Ref: 1.......2.....
*This time, JIN pulls Rott off, then Stomps him repeatidlyin the back of the head! HE covers!*
Ref: 1........2.....
*IT’s broken up by Covetous, who drops a Hulk Hogan leg onSaotome! Jin and Covie stand up, and begin delivering blows to each other,while Rott and Hystalin do the same!*
Bob: O_O! Here we go!
Jeice: >=)! Heh Heh Yeah! The honeymoon’s overnow! O_o Ralph? What’s wrong man?
Ralph: =\ not enough puppies in this match...
*The jacked up one throws Rott all the way across the ring,and into the barbed wire. Rott grunts slightly in pain, but RIPS himself freeof the spikes seconds before he’s knocked to the top of the dome by Hystalin’s”Flight of Destruction” uppercut! His body hits the roof!*
!!!!ZOOLLTT!!!!
Rott: X_X!!!
*She turns toward Covie and Jin, and almost decapitates theboth of them with a nasty double clothesline filled with light energy! TheNeo-Saiyan is back up to his feet right as Hystalin fires off the--*
Hystalin: ANGEL’S BLAZE!!
*Which engulfs Covetous and knocks him into the cage! Jinkicks back up to his feet and uses a high roundhouse kick which is caught byHystalin! She kicks out his other leg, sending him to his back! Now, with bothof his legs in her hands, she smiles deviously!*
Hystalin: >=)!!
Jin: O_O!!
*Jin’s lower extremities feels the fury of the NutshotExplosion! 24 ballshots later, she powers up to super saiyan level two, andprepares to blow a hole through him! Before she can, Covetous grabs her by theback of the head, and drivers her face down on the mat, saving Jin’s ass!*
Ralph: X_X.. Thank you God.. for making Covetous..
Jeice: x_x I feel ya.
Bob: *holds his crotch* X_X
*He wraps his arms around Hystalin and powers up to his“Neo-Saiyan” Status! Hystalin is ravaged from head to toe from his immensepower! Rott goes to attack Covetous from behind, but is caught with a heelkick! Hystalin is thrown face first into the steel cage and barbed wire! Hecrotches, allowing Rott to stand back up!*
Covetous: Heh!
*He creates a small sphere of ki known as the implosionball, and nails Rott in the face with it! After the second explosion, Rottflies back, and lands waist first in the barbed wire!*
Rott: x_x!
*Jin is kicked right on the bridge of his nose, shatteringit from the force of the saiyan’s boot! At the same time, Hystalin stumblesaround, just as Covetous raises his arms and unleashes his “Column of Hatred”attack! She’s caught in the brunt of the blast and sent into the cage AGAIN!*
Hystalin: X_X!!!!
*She’s ripped from the wire, kicked in the stomach andhoisted over the Neo-Saiyan’s head! He’s got her set up for the Crucifix Bomb!But before he can commit, Jin plasters the back of his knees with a nasty low,spinning kick! Jin then holds Hystalin down by her shoulders, and repeatidlyknees her on each side of her face! He draws back and gives her one final stiffknee to her temple before standing up!*
Bob: Saotome’s beggingfor Covetous to get up! This doesn’t look good!
*The moment Covetous regains composure, Jin grabs his ass andpowers up to the max! Then, he slams the saiyan head first into the mat, allfour turnbuckles, the floor again, then uppercuts his ass to the top of thecage! The impact snaps the barbed wire from the steel bars and all of it fallsto the floor!*
Jin: >=|!!!
*Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Rott starting tostand back up.. so for his troubles, he gives the chainsmoker the “SAOTOMECYCLONE” Rott is blown away!! It seems that Jin is on fire.. until DAN deliversa nasty Uppercut to the balls! Jin doubles over for a SECOND, then sucks thepain up!*
Jin: >:|!
Dan: O_O!!!
*He catches Dan around the throat!*
Dan: X_X!!!!
Ralph: oh shit.. Dan’s about to go for a ridehere!
Jeice: a big one...
*He flips the champion upside down, and nails the Hangman DDT!!Right as he goes for the cover, Rott miraculously kicks back up so his feet!Jin turns around as Rott preforms the Ginga Technique, immediately into his“Queixada-martelo-chapa-martelo-chapa de costas” Combo, then is finished offwith a Parafuso kick, shades of William Clarke! The former IP champion stompson the ground, releasing two straight razorblades from the very sole of hisshoe!*
Rott: >=|!! *LIGHTS UP*
*As Covetous stands up, Rott gains speed, and plasters thesaiyan with his Mariposa spin kick! Rott lands on his back, then spins back tohis feet in a “spinarooni” type manuver!*
Hystalin: KAMEHAMEHA!!
!!BLOOOM!!
Rott: X_X!!
*Hystalin uses Master Roshi’s infamous move to stop Rott’samazing Capoeira preformance!*
Hystalin: >_< ...
*Meanwhile in the back... Johnny Cockring climbs into thesound truck!*
Guy: e_e Hey! You can’t be in here! What are you doing?
Johnny: Get out of my way, or I’ll SUE! >=|
*The lawyer slides a CD into the player, and flips theswitch!*
........YOU’VE GOT THE TOUCH..................
YOU’VE GOT THE POWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jeice: What the HELL?!
*The champion hears the music, and he can feel energyreturning to his body!*
Dan: o_o...... >=|!!!
*Dan grabs a hold of Hystalin’s Leotard, and tries to pickhimself back up!*
Dan: >=|!!
Hystalin: ........ >=|........
*She helps him up.... into the fireman’s carry! She fliesinto the air, and brings him down with a SECOND Suplex of Doom!*
Bob: SUPLEX OF DOOM!SUPLEX OF DOOM!!
*Hystalin goes to cover Dan after the amazing Angeleesesuplex!*
Ref: 1....2....
*BUT DAN KICKS OUT!! DAN KICKS OUT!! Hystalin is shocked andfilled with disbelief!!*
Hystalin: O_O!!
*Dan slowly stands up to his feet! He points toward thejacked up bitch, and begins shaking his head! Yes.. Daniel Hibiki is hulking uplike the immortal one!!!*
Jeice: WHAT THE HELL ISGOING ON?!!?!?
*Hystalin actually takes a step back, unsure of what to do!That’s when it happens! The champ preforms a pirouette, and morphs into ChunLi! Another pirouette, then he morphs into Mai! Then Sakura!*
Hystalin: @_@!!
*Dan is now fully powered! With a raging aura of ki flowingaround him, he morphs into Kyo, Gouki himself!!*
Hystalin: X_X!!!!
*Hystalin is sent into the dark, demented parallel universeknown as Dan’s Super Taunt! Out of no where, Jin spins the champ around, kickshim in the stomach, and sets him up!*
Jin: e_e!!!
*He throws Dan over his shoulder and leaps to the top of thedomecage, before slamming him neck and head first into the mat!*
Bob: HEAVEN TO HELL! HEAVEN TO HELL!!
Jeice: X_X Jin’s got Dan folded up like a damnblanket!!
*Jin puts his feet on the barbed wire ropes for addedleverage!*
Ref: 1.......2....
*But Dan KICKS OUT!*
Ralph: X_X! I can’t believe this!!
Bob: How... After the beating he’s taken in thismatch.. HOW is Dan kicking out of these finsihing moves?!?!!?
Jeice: .....I think Dan’s going to win thisone.....
Bob: What?!
Jeice: .. nothing! X_X
*Right when Jin stands back up, five large ki spheres blasthim in the face from several different directions, courtesy the Neo-Saiyan.Jin’s sent flying into the barbed wire ropes, and falls upside down. TheNeo-saiyan pulls Dan up by the ponytail, and sizes him up for the next fewseconds..*
Dan: X_x...
Covetous: >=)!
*He drives a foot to the stomach, then lifts him into theair with his arms stretched out!*
Jeice: here we go! Timefor the Burter.. uhh.. Crucifix powerbomb!
*Not only that, but to make SURE Dan doesn’t get up fromthis next attack, he powers his ass down onto the ripped apart barbed wirerope!!*
!!!WHOOM!!
Crowd: OOOOOOOOOHHH!!!!!
Jeice: X_x!!!
Bob: Dan was just.. Crucifix Bombed on BarbedWire!! Just how much more can he take?!
*The ref goes down...*
Ref: 1.........2.........
*But Dan Kicks up AGAIN!!*
Crowd: O_O!!
Covetous: ... x_x!!
Dan: @_@!
*The now dumbfounded saiyan jumps back to his feet, unsurewhat to do next, that’s whenever he’s spun around! Covetous’ forehead isembedded with a bionic foot! He staggers a few seconds, giving Rott the spacehe needs to preform his “Parafuso” kick! Rott sends Covetous flying into theelectrified cage! Saiyan or not, the million volts fry what little fur he hasleft on his tail!*
Covie: ... x_x...
Ralph: Whoa!
*The mercanary senses the Grand Champion standing back up..*
Rott: .... e_e.....
*He leaps into the air, flying back
Dan: X_X!!!
*Rott makes the damn cover!!*
Ref: 1.......2.....
*NO! KICK OUT AGAIN!!*
Everyone: X_X!!!
10........ 9............8........... 7............. 6.........
*Everyone inside the cage looks around, trying to figure outwhat the hell is counting down!*
Jeice: e_e
Ralph: ....
Everyone: o_o.....
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*Several CLAYMOREMINES posistioned around the ring EXPLODE, creating not only an explosion equalto 80 pounds of C4 EACH, but also sending several hundred thousand ball bearingprojectiles totalling up to 300 pounds through the cage, and into the damncrowd!*
Bob, Ralph, Jeice: O_O!! OHSHIT!!
*The commentators duck down as their table is bombarded withprojectiles! Inside the ring.. the smoke clears, and EVERYONE, including thesaiyans assed out in the ring! Even the poor Referee caught some of the blast!*
Everyone: X_X!!!
*Anyone who’s still alive in the crowd chants...*
Crowd: HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLYSHIT!
*The crowd dies down.. because even after fifteen or moreminutes.. NO ONE in the ring is moving!*
Bob: .. I think it’saround this time that I say SOMEONE STOP THE DAMN MATCH!
*No one would expect the next turn of events! DAN is thefirst one to move! In fact, he actually.. miraculously.. stands back to hisfeet before anyone!*
Dan: X_x....
Jeice: How?! HOW HOW HOW?!!?
Ralph: ..maybe he’s better adjusted to getting hisass kicked than the other four???
*He’s up.. but he’s still delirious! He doesn’t even knowhe’s still in the damn match!*
Dan: x_x... I’d like two whoppers and a largeorder of fries please? Oyaji...and a large... x_x.. strawberry milkshake... togo...
*Jin, Covetous, and Hystalin all start to move as well....*
Jeice: finally.. e_e
Bob: Yes! The superbeings are beginning to comeback to their senses!
*Dan punches Hystalin, then kicks Covetous and Jin to keepthem down for as long as he can!*
Dan: X_x..!
*But Out of no where, Rott kicks up to his feet with a newburst of energy!*
Everyone: O_O!??!!?
Rott: >=|!
Dan: o_o.. O_O!!
*Dan turns around, and is quickily snapped into the FlamingFist technique, which grants a HUGE pop from the UCTF Crowd! He locks on theCarotid Artery Chokehold (The 9th level of the Flaming Fist)! After fiveseconds, Dan begins tapping like a wildman!!*
Jeice: O_O!! DAN’S TAPPING DAN’S TAPPING!
Bob: AMAZING! NEW GRAND CHAMPION!
Ralph: DAMNIT!! NO REF!!!
*But the ref is STILL Koed! Dan delivers a devestating mulekick to the nutsack of Rott which staggers him up!*
Ralph: OH WHAT THE HELL?!!?!?!?
Jeice: X_X!! No Referee! No win for Rott! You knowthe deal! It happened to me at the last OYC!!
Bob: X_X!!! Damnit we were so close!!! O_O and Ican’t believe I’m going for Rott!
Jeice: We’re going for ANYONE. As long as it’s notDan!
* The Grand Champion spins around, and catches Rott with hisHisshou Buraiken Super Combo! He finishes the combo with a super uppercut, knockingRott into the electrified Cage! He falls free, and right into the ShinkuuGadouken attack!*
!!THOOOM!! !!THOOOM!!!!THOOOM!! !!THOOOM!! !!THOOOM!!
Jeice: o_o... he...connected......
*He covers Rott for the win, but then painfully realizesthat there’s STILL no ref! That’s when he feels someone grabbing a hold of his ponytail, and YANKING him back to hisfeet!*
Dan: o_o!
Hystalin: >=|!
Bob: NOT GOOD FOR DAN!
Jeice: I can’t watch this...
*He’s quickly swept into the fireman’s carry, before Hystalinflies to the top of the cage! She barrels back to the mat with another Suplexof Doom, only this time, she drops him back-first over her knee!*
Everyone: OOOH!!!! X_x!!!
*She lets his now unconscious body fall to the ground!Before she goes for the pin, she nudges the referee ever so gently in thechest..*
Hystalin: GET UP! >=|
!!WHAM!!
Ref: X_X!!!
*Finally, the ref begins to come back to his senses! NowHystalin is only THREE short seconds away from finally becoming the new UCTFGrand Champion!*
Jeice: Someone better do something soon! I thinkthis match is just about....... o_o...... O_O!!
Bob: What?!!?
Ralph: ?!!
Jeice: O_O! Someone’s behind
*Right before she can go for the pin, someone DECLOAKS frombehind her! She turns around, and her eyes widen in fear when she sees...*
Jeice, Bob, Ralph: DAYVIDNITE?!!?!?
Dayvid: >=|!
Hystalin: O_O!!
*Before she can react, he spins her upside down! His rocketsboost him to the top of dome cage, seconds before he drives Hystalin severalfeet to the top of her head, nailing his Fire Thunder Piledriver! He doesn’tlet her go, as he delivers a SECOND, then a THIRD, then a FOURTH one rightafter the other!*
Hystalin: X_X!!!
Jeice: X_X! Oh SHIT!
*He sees Jin and Covetous beginning to stand and attacksthem as well! First, he delivers two more to Covetous, then another to Jin!*
Bob: He’s attacking EVERYTHING that moves!
Ralph: e_e I’m leaving.
Jeice: O_o?
Ralph: and you should too Jeice. >=| What doJin, Hystalin, and Covetous have in common?
Jeice: ... they were all in Fatali?
Ralph: ...
Jeice: e_e I’m coming with you.
*Ralph and Jeice LEAVE Bob all alone in the commentarybooth!*
Bob: o_o!?!? Where areyou guys going?!!?
*After disposing of everyone inside the cage, Dayvid takesthe current like a man before grabbing the electrified dome and RIPPING itapart! He walks away, leaving a trail of passed out bodies in the first row ofthe audience... Back in the ring... Dan slowly rolls over to his stomach, andplaces ONE FINGER on top of Hystalin! The referee crawls over into position...*
Bob: oh god no! Don’t letit end this way!!
Ref: 1...........
Bob: NO!! Hystalin Kickout!
Ref: 2..................
Bob: *Covers his ears*X_X!!!!
Ref: 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!DING DING DING!! !!DING DING DING!!
!ALRIGHT PARTNA… JUST KEEPOOON POSIN.. YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS!
Announcer: The winner... and STILL UCTF GrandChampion... DAN HIBIKI!
Crowd: O_O..BOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bob: ...HFALKJSDFAJJ!!!X_X!!!!!! I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS!! GIVE THE FUCKING ASSIST TO DAYVID NITE!! DANIS STILL THE CHAMPION!! WHY DON’T DAYVIDJUST F******* DIE?!!?!? >=|!!!
*The other members of Pink Tsunami rush in and grab his assbefore the enraged crowd can kill him! In a match that will probably put Dan inthe hospital for another three years, Dan Hibiki SOMEHOW came out the winneryet AGAIN!!*
Dan: X_X.......... *holdsthe belt up* ........
Winner and STILL UCTF Grand Champion: DAN
Bob: ~_~ For Jeice andRalph who just ran like little girls.. this is Bobby Hinden saying goodnight.~_~!!